509-The Girl in Lovers Lane

Film Year:  1960
Genre:  Drama
Director:  Charles R. Rondeau
Starring:  Brett Halsey, Joyce Meadows, Lowell Brown
MST Season:  5

The Movie

Afraid at the thought of his parents' divorce, an upperclass boy named Danny runs away from home and gets caught up with a drifter named Bix Dugan.  Bix takes Danny under his wing and protects him from the various unfriendliness out in the world, also saving Danny's large wad of cash in the process.  Their latest stop is a small town, but their way of life becomes complicated when Bix falls in love with a local waitress and wrestles with his opposite desires to stay with her and run away from his problems.

The Girl in Lovers Lane's biggest crime is that it's not any notch above watchable time killer.  The story of two drifters is fairly trite and it offers very little new about the world weary main character trope.  That said, while it's not well made, it's fairly adequately made.  Acting is a bit wooden, but nobody is particularly horrible.  This is one of the most mediocre movies ever featured on the show, and it's hard to really have an opinion on it in any direction.

When it is discussed in Mystery Science Theater circles, the one point that always seems to be brought up is the film's third act, which is divisive in that it takes a depressing plot turn that doesn't sit well with a lot of viewers.  For those who don't mind having their crappy movie from MST lore being spoiled, it goes like this (skip a paragraph if you do not wish to read it, but it's really hard to discuss this film without bringing it up):  Bix's girl Carrie is brutally murdered by the town's local creepy stalker and the blame falls on Bix, so the town chases him down in a mob-like fashion.  Does the film's story need this jolt?  That's debatable.  There are probably a number of ways this story could have played out without killing Carrie, who is the most likable character in the movie by a wide margin.  However given how bland in general this movie is, the fact that it's plot twist is fairly ballsy and gives the film a bit of personality it had been sorely lacking before, I'd say it's probably the best thing that could have happened in the story.  I mean, there is a reason we keep talking about Carrie's death and hardly anything else about the film.

But with "the twist" out of mind, The Girl in Lovers Lane is...a movie.  There's not much debating that.  It's neither a great one nor a bad one, though I'd say I'd rather watch this movie on a rainy day over other films I could name.  But I'd probably watch something else instead too.

The Episode

"Big Stupid to the rescue!"

I think this episode lives a bit in the shadow of I Accuse My Parents, which was only several episodes ago and also centered around a black and white youth drama.  That episode clicks with a lot of people, what with it's goofy movie, rapid fire riffing, and stellar host segments.  I'm not taking anything away from I Accuse My Parents, because I love it too, but I enjoy The Girl in Lovers Lane more.  The movie is more of a downer than I Accuse My Parents, which can sour the experience, but those willing to let the riffing work its magic will find that they're perfectly in step with it.

Probably the main characters make the riff, as they take their lackluster personalities and project more entertaining ones into lead duo.  The character of Bix Dugan has his unique name misheard by our riffers, forcing them to dub him "Big Stupid" (which honestly shouldn't make me laugh as much as it does, but here I am).  His sidekick character of Danny also comes under fire, and they turn him into Big Stupid's eager lapdog, constantly agreeing with him and asking him questions.  They played up melodramatic scenarios that these characters find themselves in the middle of also become an advantage, because there's so much for Joel and the Bots to build upon and play with.  There's a scene early on where Big Stupid and Danny get into an ally fight, which is hysterical ("Plop plop, fist fist!  Oh what a fight it is!").  There is an excellent sequence in a brothel also that works up some of the biggest laughs of the episode ("Joel, when I grow up I want to be a drifter!").  The romance of the piece holds up to the humor as well, as Danny's rushing through prostitutes to start dating the most promiscuous non-hooker in town, while Bix's budding relationship with waitress Carrie and dealing with her drunk father is a greater joke target than it should be.

Plus this episode has "Camera three!  Get off the tracks!"

The host segments are pretty lightweight but mostly amusing.  I quite love the closing segment where the Bots create their own ending to the film.  There's also a great song called "Pleasant Journey," a reenactment of the pinball machine scene, Crow imitating the creepy Jack Elam, and the Bots trying to create their own belly buttons.  The Invention Exchange offers Don Martins footwear, while the Mads come up with evil baseball promotional days.  The latter is hilarious, but not really an invention.

While the movie does indeed become aggressive in the home stretch, the episode surrounding it counterweights everything about it just so beautifully that I can't help but give this a high grade.  This isn't just one of the best episodes of the season, but it might even be my all-time favorite Joel-hosted episode.  This one is immensely rewatchable for me, with a reasonably watchable movie that's easy to follow and the hearty laughs I get from the series.  Give it a shot, and it may just become a favorite of yours as well.  Or it will depress the hell out of you.  Either way, MADE YOU LOOK!

Classic

The DVD

THE GIRL IN LOVERS LANE LIVES!  On DVD that is.  The Girl in Lovers Lane was wisely one of the episodes Shout Factory released early on in their Volume XV set.  Audio and video were good.  The only bonus feature was footage from the MST3K Scrapbook, though technically it's footage they took from the Making of MST3K special that aired on Comedy Central, so I guess you could just skip the middleman and say it's just clips from that.  We watch the writing process of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and filming of scenes, as well as a visit to "the Toolmaster" (Tim Allen?).