In a moment of innovation, Best Brains Inc. and Rhino Home Video decide to offer up a video of shorts, those small films that episodes would use to pad out the runtime in case they need ten more minutes to fill their time allotted. Often at the expense of dated educational films that mostly discuss common sense, these little slices of the series soon became fan favorites and now seven of them are presented in one package without the baggage of an entire Mystery Science Theater episode to weigh them down. It's like popping Skittles in your mouth without having to eat your spinach!
There would be five more shorts compilations that followed and while the quality short films wouldn't exactly run light, the one virtue this first volume of fun has is that it was made while the series was still on the air and they managed to get Kevin Murphy to film a series of bumpers for the collection in character as Tom Servo on the Satellite of Love bridge! Servo's intros are an absolute delight and it's unfortunate that it wasn't something retained for further volumes (or at least bring in Crow for the next volume to even it out) because he really makes this compilation special. It's not just a series of stuff we've seen before, but new material as well! This makes Shorts Volume 1 a must own for any MSTie!
As for the shorts themselves, the heavy hitter of the set is the exceptional Cheating short, which is just a gold mine. I have a lot of fondness for Why Study Industrial Arts and The Chicken of Tomorrow as well, while A Date With Your Family is pretty fun as well. Those are just the Mike shorts of the sets, what about Joel's you might ask? Joel's offerings take up the rear for me, though I do enjoy Body Care and Grooming quite a bit. Home Economics is a short that works better in the package of the episode it's paired with while Junior Rodeo Daredevils is probably the one short of the series that I struggle with. The downside to this volume is that these two lesser shorts are what open the volume up, which starts things off with a slow pace. Sticking with the compilation is recommended however, as the laughter spikes as soon as we get past those speed bumps.
Are you a woman who dreams of being President of the United States? An Astronaut? Curing cancer? Dream no longer! Because that aint gonna happen! We’re here to tell you how you’re paying good money to go to college yet the only course for you is Home Economics, to prepare you for all those jobs out there for women: like cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children!
A short that’s more dated than most provides a look at what doors were open to women in the 1950’s, which weren’t very many. The short was probably made as a helpful tool to guide young girls into picking a career, even if that “career” was housewife. Today it’s sad, but at the time it probably seemed proactive. This was what a woman’s life was like, and these were the options they had, and Home Economics was a safe bet in ensuring they exorcised those options into their maximum potential.
There’s very little here for a modern viewer, unless one really wants to be domestic and loves Home Economics. If that’s the direction you want, then power to you. But be forewarned that feminists aren’t high on this short’s list of people to please.
Now get into the kitchen, bitch. And don’t leave unless you’re popping out a baby.
To be honest, the first time I had seen The Home Economics Story was outside of the show on the Shorts Volume 1 DVD, and I was left unimpressed. It’s fairly long, drones on and on, and at times it can seem overwhelmingly monotonous. Within the context of the episode, it flows a lot smoother, and it’s hard to explain why. I think the surrounding episode gives the short in question a better foothold and it works better as an actual ensemble piece.
Junior Rodeo Daredevils
Two juvenile delinquents decide to be idiots and vandalize a horse’s rear end. Instead of doing the sane thing and letting the horse kick them, old cowpoke Billy Slater convinces them to use their energy by organizing a junior rodeo, because these kids are obviously focused enough to do such a thing.
I hate rodeos. I grew up with them, because my mother and sister were horse riders and both had been part of them several times (my mother was a barrel racer while my sister just marched through them with the US flag). However, I just could never get into the sport. I was constantly told that the only real men were bull riders. I’m sorry that not tying up a bull’s testicles and being stupid enough to climb on its back makes me not a “real man,” but personally I can live with that.
Rodeos feel like animal cruelty for entertainment, which just doesn’t gel with me. Needless to say, this short bugs the hell out of me. Not just the rodeos, but the obnoxious kids and shameless western drawl narrator just makes me want to burn this thing. Rodeos can go to hell. And this junior rodeo can rot right beside it.
Not only is the short annoying, but the riffing doesn’t cut it. It gets off to a bad start after the title is announced in a thick country accent, “Junior Rodeo Daredevils,” and Joel pipes up “Smothered in gravy, TEXAS STYLE!” I understand what this is a reference to, and to a lesser extent I understand why he made the riff. The problem is it isn’t funny. And when I say I don’t find it funny, I mean that I don’t find it funny at all. The short is littered with similar riffs, where I get them but don’t find them funny. As the short goes on there seems like there should be a lot that can be done with the material, but at times Joel and the bots become content with repeating the same lame jokes over and over. It grows tiresome hearing “And the crowd goes wild!” “Yaaaaaaaaaaay.” repeatedly over the short’s brief runtime. Junior Rodeo Daredevils is a tiresome chore.
Body Care and Grooming
Does one hear a condescending narrator? If you hear the sound of image shaming that means you shall be filmed bathing, dressing, and grooming one’s self in order to fit in with social norms and land yourself a husband. And thus is the tale of Body Care and Grooming, the short that desires you to look and smell your best.
Almost something of a companion short to Keeping Clean and Neat, this one targets college age viewers as opposed to children. As a result, it tries to get a bit more technical with bodily functions and appeals to one’s libido by making the claim that one will never get laid if they look a mess. The short is a bit self-explanatory, though one must wonder how bad college campuses got if they needed to spread the word about bathing properly.
Joel and the bots aren’t afraid to get messy, as opposed to the short which is about cleaning up. The love to pick apart the exaggerated examples and poke at the anal retentiveness, as well as just playing with the production values in general. They pretty much nail the tone as the short finishes with “the end of the perfect day,” to which Joel points out “An entire day spent grooming.”
Dumbass Johnny is having trouble with math and asks to copy off of Mary’s paper. Johnny is soon elected into student council and finds himself relying on Mary’s answers more than ever. But when his sham is discovered, everything he has achieved is at risk as his life spirals out of control.
This short is obviously shown to classrooms to dissuade cheaters, though it’s easy to deduce that the film portrays a worst case scenario. It’s unlikely most cheaters would hold a student council chair, and if they did I’d be more concerned that somebody holding a rank can’t do simple fractions. Though it skims over that with the line “I don’t think anyone that cheats should hold in office.” Political commentary noted, though all of Washington laughs at this line.
Melodrama runs high as the director aims for a bizarre noir-ish tone for a simple matter of someone cheating on a test. But they’re likely trying to evoke stress in a young viewer in hopes that they’ll straighten up and fly right. Can’t say it’s ineffective, though as an adult watching it’s kind of hilarious. And honestly I imagine the only real moral they’ll learn is “Don’t get caught.”
But remember, if you cheat in school, YOUR LIFE WILL BE DESTROYED!
The crew zeroes in on its jarringly dark tone and get dark with the riffs, taking Johnny through bits of depression and suicide. If the short were any less dour than it is they might have failed venturing here, but it’s really a match made in heaven. Not to mention it houses one of the best riffs of the entire series: “Your one mistake, you’ve signed your test ‘Mary Matthews.’”
A monotonous narrator guides us through the importance of spending time with the family as we watch a family spending the evening together for dinner and discussion. But be forewarned, there is a endless list of do’s and don’ts to take to heart, or father will scowl at you and narrator will disapprove.
Worthwhile subject matter of making family just as important as personal time is aimed primarily at teenagers and children in an attempt to show them how fun family time can be. It fails. It makes family time look anguishing; with so much proper etiquette to follow otherwise you ruin everything. Honestly, if you can’t fart in front of family, who can you fart in front of?
But that’s kind of the point, as it goes to great lengths to try and portray a proper socializing environment with the people you spend every day of your lives with. The short wants you to keep family close, which is something that gets lost as one gets older (specifically with teenagers). But this short is more likely to bore the people they’re trying to spread that message to, who are more likely afterward to pick up the telephone, call their buds, and ask them if they want to go to a movie instead of spending an evening at home.
Mike and the bots are on fire with A Date with Your Family, as the short’s pantomime becomes a huge advantage. The only dialogue comes from the narrator while the actors try to act out to the best of their abilities, often wildly overdoing it. It becomes child’s play for our riffers to just add their own dialogue to the scenes, resulting in huge laughs.
Why Study Industrial Arts
"You know, it's fun to have an idea..."
"There, wasn't that fun?"
This little instructional short was likely shown as introductions to industrial arts or as some sort of tool in order to help teenagers decide what courses to take that encourages an industrial arts course. It tells of a boy with a woody for shop (heh heh, I'm funny) who discusses why the class could help prepare anybody for future careers and/or homelife.
The points in this short are hard to argue with the points that are made, as it does an adequate job of relaying the handiness in having good hands and tools in the future. Though the short itself is one of those poor presentations of a stilted discussion that pretty much no teenager would ever have, where one lectures about proper preparation and etiquette while the other listens attentively and "Ya know, you're right!" at the end.
Maybe I'm just salty because I slept through my industrial arts course and have been learning shit like this the hard way ever since.
This is a grade-A short, where some fabulous riffs are nailing this educational tool back and crafting something more useful out of it. There is especially a fetishistic tone in the room, as they take the main character's love of industrial arts and makes it so very dirty. Riffing on teens in these films is always a hoot, because acting is usually robotic and Why Study Industrial Arts is no exception. Because of the lack of personality being displayed they can project whichever personality they desire onto them, and most of the time a laugh riot will result.
The Chicken of Tomorrow
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? WE MUST HAVE AN ANSWER! Unfortunately this short doesn’t give us one, instead being a documentary about the chicken farming industry and its various branches, all the way to eggs and a delicious roasted dinner! Celebrate the chicken by eating one tonight, whether unborn or with its head lopped off!
Like most industrial shorts, The Chicken of Tomorrow is a dry affair with repetitive footage of equipment being ran back and forth. This one gets off easy because chickens are fun to look at. But unless you have an interest in the subject they’re teaching you, it will still be quite a bore.
The riffing is just wondrous. Full of those wonderfully cuddly flightless birds, Mike and the bots have a blast at playing ventriloquist with them. They don’t slouch with the industrial side either, having fun with the almost lustful fawning over the technical aspects of chicken farming of the short. This short is classic.
The DVD
Rhino Home Video released Shorts Volume 1 as a part of their Volume 2 collection. Audio and video were solid, but there were no bonus features. Shout Factory also released their own version of Volume 2 with the shorts compilation intact.
