Yor, the Hunter from the Future (RiffTrax)

Film Year:  1983

Genre:  Science Fiction, Adventure

Director:  Antonio Margheriti

Starring:  Reb Brown, Corinne Cléry, John Steiner, Carole André

RiffTrax Year:  2019

Riffers:  Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett

The Movie

This film centers on Yor, a caveman with his own theme song, who saves a duo of hunters named Kala and Pag from a dinosaur.  Yor takes refuge with their tribe as Kala expresses attraction to Yor because he is cave-GORGEOUS!  But as Neanderthals attack the tribe and kidnap Kala, Yor and Pag venture to save her.  Victorious, the trio begin their own adventure, eventually stumbling upon a woman named Roah who may unlock the keys to Yor's origins and also really wants a piece of Yor, much to Kala's chagrin.  The perilous journey leads through many cavewomen who want some hot Yor action and they eventually find Yor's past and also his future.

Spoiler alert:  It could almost be argued that this is also some sort of remake of Teenage Cave Man.  Or maybe that's not a spoiler, since the word "Future" is in the title.

Yor, the Hunter from the Future is an Italian film that feels like it's trying to emulate many things simultaneously.  The film is primarily about barbarians dealing with other barbarians, which makes it a Conan the Barbarian riff, but it's hero is a dreamy blonde hunk who jams to his own rock theme tunes, which makes it feel like it's also inspired by Flash Gordon.  If those weren't enough, the film is also something of a slight callback to films about cavepeople mingling with dinosaurs, like One Million Years B.C.  The mixture between these corners of genre filmmaking is interesting to say the least and it's hard to not be amused by the odd concoction on display.  Though one can argue that the true reason the film exists is as an excuse for low angles so we can look up cave-people skirts and stare at asses.

One of those asses belongs to Reb Brown, who most will know and love from his starring role in Space Mutiny, though Yor predates that film by a good five years.  This was after his stint at playing Captain America in the late 70's in a pair of failed TV pilots, so this film nicely sandwiches in between those ripe slices of cheese in his career.  Another butt that flashes often belongs to Corinne Cléry, probably best known today for a side-role in the James Bond film Moonraker.  Brown is given a lot of women to fawn over him, while Cléry gives them all looks of jealousy, letting the entire world know that she is the only person in this movie that believes in monogamy.  But perhaps she gives in to the polygamous ways, because there is a curious scene later on in which she happily follows Yor and three young tribe girls into a secluded hideaway, which I can only assume was to set up an orgy that the movie never followed through with because they were interrupted by the village being on fire.

This all comes to a head as the movie takes a sci-fi turn in its third act, as the primitive people are given laser guns and rocketships and use them as if they've always known how to use them.  Yor is a crazy movie with a goofy premise that it more than lives up to.  While I can't promise that you'll admire the film, it's hard not to have fun with this movie as it just lets itself loose guns blazing with its meathead ambitions.  This is the type of movie Friday nights, beer, and pizza are made for!

The Trax

Cutting to the chase, the RiffTrax for Yor, the Hunter from the Future is funny.  I can safely say most will have a good time with this.  The one thing holding me back from going full praise on it is that I'm not entirely convinced that most of the heavy lifting isn't done by the film itself.  Yor is a funny movie and I find it almost impossible to not have fun with it, which means a RiffTrax of this movie is almost assuredly a worthwhile purchase.  But is the riff as funny as the movie?

I'm a little hesitant to say it is.  There are quite a few good lines in this riff that got me chuckling, I almost feel like I was laughing more consistently at the film itself than I was at the RiffTrax.  Sometimes the riffs can enhance the laughter, as there are some excellent reactions to the absurd moments of the film, the most memorable being a scene where Pag does some unexpected acrobatics at the end.  That's probably enough to recommend this riff as a purchase, because the riff is more a seasoning than an entire meal and that seasoning really brings out the flavor.

The riff is infused with a lot of jokes about Yor being a "himbo," frat boy, surfer type, which works quite well because of Yor's constant smiley cluelessness to his surroundings.  Backing him up are a load of riffs about Kala's jealousy of Yor's constant flirtations throughout the film, which is a running gag in the film through her constant stink-eye that they just give a vocalization to.  And watching them work with Pag is fun because he is an out-of-shape middle-aged man who is stuck with these sexy things and they have nothing but fun ways to point out how he is an unwelcome third wheel on Yor's sexy adventures with bikini babes.  There is definitely enough here to make this a part of your RiffTrax collection even if the movie does slightly overwhelm them.

GOOD!

Ventriloquist from the Future!

The DVD

Yor, the Hunter from the Future was released through RiffTrax's website as a part of their Toxic Box set.  Audio and video were solid, however it should be noted that since Yor's digital version offered an HD version of the video, this disc is a downgrade.  Unlike other RiffTrax DVD titles, this disc does not offer an unriffed track of the film, likely since it was edited down for their use which would make a separate audio track impractical.  There is however a bonus feature of Talkin' RiffTrax, which was a five minute discussion of the film by Mike, Kevin, and Bill that was originally released to patrons.

Mystery Science Theater 3000: Volume XXXIV DVD Retrospective

Release Date:  December 1, 2015

Buy It Here!

The Saga of the Viking Women and Their Voyage to the Waters of the Great Sea Serpent (retitled on cover as Viking Women vs. the Sea Serpent)

War of the Colossal Beast

The Undead

The She-Creature

This box set is such a celebration of American International Pictures and their contributions to the cheesy movie market that its special features are mostly devoted solely to a documentary about the history of the company that is about as long as the Mystery Science Theater episodes themselves.  While it doesn't have every AIP episode of the series (there were way more than four), it is a nice sampler pack with some pretty fine episodes in Viking Women and the Sea Serpent and The Undead.  War of the Colossal Beast and The She-Creature aren't nearly as good, but the former contains the most popular short of the series, Mr. B Natural.  I'm not a huge fan of the short myself, but most would consider the set a must-own based on that alone.

Average Rating (out of 4):  2.75

Audio and video for this release were mostly good, though Undead featured some slight flaws.  The only sizable bonus feature is the above mentioned documentary, It Was a Colossal Teenage Movie Machine.  It also features a trailer for Viking Women and War of the Colossal Beast by Frank Conniff and theatrical trailers for Colossal Beast, Undead, and The She-Creature.  That's it, but the documentary is so massive that it makes up for the lack of content.

The box art is the usual stock cover that Shout Factory gave the series, featuring the Mystery Science Theater logo in the upper left corner, the theater seat silhouettes at the bottom looking up at the roman numerals XXXIV painted in purple against a starry backdrop.  The interior cases however feature wonderful art by Steve Vance.  Viking Women's title has been shortened to the much more shelf-friendly Viking Women vs. the Sea Serpent, and features Tom Servo as a Viking woman daring to sail the treacherous waters and do battle with Crow as the sea serpent.  War of the Colossal Beast sees Servo playing Glen, the titular Colossal Beast, towering above his sister, played by Crow.  The Undead sees Crow dressed up as the male lead and Servo as our time traveling hooker, surrounded by inferno as the face of the devil looks on above them.  The She-Creature sees Servo as hypnotist Carlo Lombardi putting his lovely assistant Crow under his spell as the title creature looms behind them.

Disc art is the standard episode logos against a starry backdrop.  The menus continue the puppet skits that we've seen in the last few sets.  Viking Women sees Crow trying to sacrifice Viking Servo to the gods by burning him at the stake.  Colossal Beast sees Crow and Servo accidentally summoning Mr. B Natural and having to call Glen the Colossal Beast to save them.  The Undead sees Crow and Servo selling their souls to the devil and all hell breaking loose on the Satellite of Love.  The She-Creature sees Crow trying to hypnotize Servo, only to have the She-Creature appear on the SOL bridge and make out with Servo.

Unfortunately Volume XXXIV was eventually pulled from the market due to a lawsuit, and not for the usual reasons of lapsing movie rights.  The AIP documentary used footage some archival public domain footage of films that were under a copyright, and the copyright holder took objection to that.  The court settlement allowed the set to remain in print for a few years though so it's not exactly a rarity, and there is always the possibility that Shout could reissue it without the documentary since they still have all the episodes under license.  That would mean setting up a new disc for Viking Women, but it doesn't seem like it should be that difficult to do.  That's just speculation on my part.  I'm glad to have the documentary, and it's sad that other fans might miss out on it, but the stars of the set will always be the episodes and at least two of them are worth collecting, while another has one of the most popular segments in the history of the show.

319-War of the Colossal Beast

Film Year:  1958

Genre:  Science Fiction

Director:  Bert I. Gordon

Starring:  Sally Fraser, Roger Pace, Dean Parkin

MST Season:  3

Featured Short:  "Mr. B Natural"

The Short

The androgynous music sprite Mr. B Natural appears to a socially awkward boy named Buzz to turn him on (?!) to the wonders of music.  Mr. B gets him to toot is own horn (?!?!) by going out and buying a trumpet.  And with no practice necessary, he is awesome at it.  Mr. B then goes into hibernation, awaiting to be called upon once again.

This weird short has been a long time favorite among MSTies for being something of an oddity.  And it lives up to the oddity part.  It tries to make children interested in music by creating a magical character out of it, but this storyline comes off less encouraging than intended.  Mr. B is a bit of a high-pitched annoyance and Buzz doesn't really experience much of a growth.  His story arch pretty much consists of buying a trumpet and reaping the rewards.

Remember kids, being instantly good at music makes you popular.

The Movie

Glenn Manning is back and he is PISSED!  Likely because he had half of his face blown off.  Now looking as badass as Gus did during his death scene in Breaking Bad, Glenn still roams the country side as a mindless giant, eating whatever the fuck he finds in the latest truck that crosses his path.  Ignoring the fact that Glenn had a fiancé in the previous film who would likely be interested in knowing that her beau is still alive, the army instead goes to Glenn's sister, likely because she doesn't have the ball and chain that Glenn's lady love had and they're free to have soldiers flirt with her.  The army aims to catch Glenn and his sister tries to reach what humanity he has left.  But is there any to reach?

This sequel to The Amazing Colossal Man seems like it should hit the ground running, as it features a Colossal Man already on the loose.  Alas it's a bit slower and the Colossal rampages seem a bit subdued.  I mean, there's nobody getting impaled by a giant syringe in this movie.  Why am I even here?  Instead we get a lot of Glenn getting tied down as people beg for him to be able to understand them, which results in a lot of garbled grunting wearing the viewer down with its unpleasantness.

Even the effects aren't up to auteur Bert I. Gordon's usual standards.  Amazing Colossal Man had fairly fake looking effects, but they held up a bit better than what's seen in Colossal Beast, as more often than not Glenn can be seen straight through like a ghost in this flick.  Miniature work tends to be a little more likable, though one wishes they did more with it than just Glenn lifting a bus and growling at it.  All of this leads to Glenn's final fate, which the movie decides to enhance its drama by filming it in technicolor.  It's only twenty seconds of footage and it adds absolutely nothing to it.

War of the Colossal Beast has no war and it's monster isn't much of a beast.  It's a lackluster sequel to a silly but enjoyable slice of B-movie cheese.  It's not so much that it's bad, it's just a bit dull.

The Episode

Come for an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000, get blindsided by Mr. B Natural instead.  If War of the Colossal Beast earned a must-see status, it's because of the short featured.

Like "Manos" The Hands of Fate, Mr. B Natural is one of those "discoveries" MST made.  When it aired, the fan base exploded with adoration for the ripe slice of WTF they had just watched.  It's one of those pieces of riffing that every fan had to see and love.  Being a fan from the Sci-Fi era I was very late to the party on Mr. B, but I had heard a lot about it, how weird it was, and how funny the riffing was.  Finally watching the short I found myself disappointed.  Maybe I built the thing too much in my head, but I think the short kind of overwhelms them.  At times they just react to it, and in the moment that's the right approach, but as the short goes on it becomes clear the majority of the short is reaction.  Reaction is great for a shock laugh, but repeating the shock over and over loses it's charm.  They ride on maybe one too many run-on gags in Mr. B Natural:  sexuality confusion over Mr. B's gender, Buzz being a loser, and just saying "Huh?" and "Oh wow" at it. And once Mr. B leaves the picture the riffing becomes a bit dead.  It's decently funny short, but not one of the greats in my book.

Now that I've successfully been a buzzkill (first Pod People, now this.  What an ass I am), we remind ourselves that there is a movie here too.  While Mr. B Natural already earned a bit of clout for this episode, I find myself greatly looking forward to the movie a bit more.  The Amazing Colossal Man is a Bert I. Gordon masterpiece and the previous Colossal riff was definitely a fun one.  Unfortunately Colossal Beast is a bit of a downer as well.  The movie is much slower, more padded, and uneventful and while there are some wacky sights, there really isn't all that much to comment on.  Some kooky segments bring highs, like a slide show for Glenn and him wriggling around some cute miniatures, though nothing here is too inspiring.  Like, Joel sees an image of an almost transparent Glenn where you can see the backdrop through him and all he can say is "He looks like a Big White Guy."  That's it?  Even if they hadn't encountered the title "Amazing Transparent Man" yet, there's definitely quite a few off-the-cuff remarks you can make that are funnier than that.  It's clear that the short has them all jazzed up though, so there is energy in the theater.  That energy might have been put to better use against a more active movie though.

The host segments do continue the wonders of Mr. B Natural, as Crow and Tom Servo debate whether Mr. B is a man or a woman.  And as we live in a world that is more accepting of trans and nonbinary culture than we were in the 90's, I say leave it be.  Mr. B can be whoever he feels he is and he's allowed to express himself!  Pronouns in the bio might be helpful though.  We also get another visit from Glenn, once again played by Mike Nelson, who is a bit more friendly and less irritable than we last saw him.  The new Mex-American food dishes are a treat (Curly Joe Dorito is genius), while the Invention Exchange is just food in canons making a mess.

This one is treated by most as one of the must watch episodes of the series, I myself am going to be more restrained about it.  Mr. B Natural is fine, I like it but don't love it.  The movie itself isn't a huge bit of hilarity but it has its moments.  It's not an episode I usually pop in by choice, more out of rotation, though it's not too disagreeable.

Average

The DVD

This episode popped up in Shout Factory's Volume XXXIV collection, with good audio and video.  There is an intro by Frank for the episode, who says he's not too fond of Bert I. Gordon movies but he respects the effort.  Also featured is a trailer for the film.

Mr. B Natural was released much earlier with the short compilation disc of Mr. B's Lost Shorts, which Rhino included on Volume 6.  Shout eventually re-released this volume with the compilation disc intact.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (RiffTrax)

Film Year:  2007

Genre:  Fantasy

Director:  David Yates

Starring:  Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grunt, Emma Watson, Evanna Lynch, Matthew Lewis, Katie Leung, Bonnie Wright, Helena Bonham Carter, Robbie Coltrane, Ralph Fiennes, Michael Gambon, Brendan Gleeson, Richard Griffiths, Jason Isaacs, Gary Oldman, Alan Rickman, Fiona Shaw, Maggie Smith, Imelda Staunton, David Thewlis, Emma Thompson, David Bradley, Warwick Davis, Tom Felton, Robert Hardy, George Harris, Natalia Tena, Julie Walters, Mark Williams, Harry Melling, James Phelps, Oliver Phelps

RiffTrax Year:  2011

Riffers:  Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett

The Movie

*I HAVE SURVIVED WATCHING THIS MOVIE UNRIFFED*

When last we visited the Harry Potter universe, the Dark Lord Voldemort had returned and murdered Edward from Twilight before it was cool to hate Edward from Twilight.  Now Harry and his friends are returning to Hogwarts for their fifth year of wizarding school and finds it being overrun by the Ministry of Magic's propaganda machine, insisting that Harry's story about Voldemort is fabricated and attempting to turn everyone against the Boy Who Lived.  With the school taken over by Ministry Official Deloris Umbridge, the school's normal activities are interfered with, causing Harry, Ron, and Hermione to rebel by creating an underground school of their own to teach the children of Hogwarts to defend themselves from whatever darkness might be lurking outside.  Harry also begins to have vivid dreams about Voldemort, hinting that he may have a dangerous link to the Dark Lord.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix was longstanding my favorite novel in the Harry Potter series.  One of my criticisms of the previous book, Goblet of Fire, was just how bloated with subplot and irrelevance it was which resulted in tiring me out long before the next plot point could take place.  Order of the Phoenix is the longest book in the series, but it seems like every plot and subplot is relevant to the story being told.  It was a compelling read the first time I picked it up, and I breezed through damn near nine hundred pages in two days.  I don't think I've done that before or since.  I'm a slow reader, goddammit!

The film adaptation is mostly faithful, however it does scale back to a fault.  Prisoner of Azkaban and Goblet of Fire were scaled back versions of their books too though it's hard to argue that what was cut out actively hurt their narratives.  Order of the Phoenix is a bit of a different story, because the structure is there but it's anemic.  Out of all of the Harry Potter adaptations, this film in particular just takes the bare essentials from the story and scrubs away a lot of what made them emotionally investing because they're kept simplified and straightforward.  And in some cases things have been whittled down to the point that reading the book almost seems like a necessity, as certain plot points are ran past without the film being all that attentive to them.  One of the most glaring occurrences is in the finale where Harry, Ron, and Hermione are joined by their friends Neville, Ginny, and Luna who all just kind of pop up for no reason.  Why are they there?  There's a reason they're there in the books, but in the film they're just kind of present in a space where they wouldn't normally be present in.  The movie doesn't care why they're there but it does know they need to be there, so it puts them there.  It's a movie that's filled with little shortcuts like this and for the most part it almost comes off as a two hour montage at times.

Order of the Phoenix is the first Harry Potter film to be directed by David Yates, who went on to finish the series as well as helm all of the prequel Fantastic Beasts films so far.  I've always enjoyed just how moody and distinctly British (for the lack of a better term) Yates made the series, which always felt like a correct tone for the Harry Potter franchise that they had been struggling to achieve.  Chris Columbus directed Harry Potter like a storybook fairy tale, while Alfonso Cuaron gave it a more macabre Brothers Grimm meets Tim Burton quality, while Mike Newell was distinctly an actors' director that didn't really care about style in the slightest.  Yates is like a compromise between Cuaron and Newell, letting the young actors carry their parts and the film narrative on their shoulders while also keeping this world of witchcraft effectively moody and a little intimidating.  Since Yates had very little large-budget experience when making this film he does suffer from some growing pains, as the green screen in the opening broom sequence can be pretty cringe and the CGI landscapes in the finale can feel a bit overblown and detached from the actors running around in them.

One thing about Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix that I feel is worth pointing out is that the film feels rather poignant today in 2022, after several years of a life-threatening event that has been played down and lied about by politicians who are clinging to their jobs by doubling down on falsehood, which created something of a shockwave that we're still dealing with.  One could say this story was ahead of its time, though I might argue that Harry Potter's outcome might be a tad bit optimistic as it seems to believe that people will accept the truth when it's finally staring them in the face.  I'd personally point out that the entirety of 2021 proves that wrong, sadly.  It's a nice thought though.

I don't think there was necessarily a bad Harry Potter movie (I even have esteem for the Chris Columbus films), though if one rang of being a missed opportunity it was definitely Order of the Phoenix.  The movie is a bit too much of a clip when it needs room to breathe, though it gets the idea across while also providing some exciting directions for the series to head toward in future instalments.  It's the definition of good, but not great.

The Trax

Some movie series sell consistently for RiffTrax as they're popular and everyone has at either a copy or a rental option at the ready.  At the same time it's probably not best to encourage continued riffs of them because even if the movies do in some cases get worse, material can dry up because you've already used everything you've had in your arsenal.  Star Wars is an example of that, as that series went through its ups and downs as RiffTrax took it on.  Twilight was the exact opposite, as each movie got more inane than the last and there was always new material to be mined.

I had suspicions that Harry Potter would be the former, but I hadn't listened to every Potter riff so I didn't know for sure.  If there is one thing that I underestimated about RiffTrax it's that these guys have a tendency to find something to latch onto to something that amuses them personally which can make the experience more fun, even if the jokes surrounding it can be a little bit stale because we've heard them before.  In Order of the Phoenix they meet a character named Deloris Umbridge and it's love at first sight.  I should have looked into my crystal ball and say I saw this coming, but for some reason I never considered it.  Their take on Umbridge is a joy to watch, as she is such an infuriating character in the narrative behind the guise of a pleasant demeanor.  Her unnatural happiness is fuel for jokes of her arousal and sexual desire, giving her the personality of a near-nymphomaniac, sometimes alluding to an affair with the school's dirty janitor Filch.  Her strict mothering personality also sets them alight, causing them to give her just enough push to make her frustrating dictatorship absurd enough to generate a belly laugh.  It's a great character for them and I'm glad I got to see them have their way with her.

And if I were to choose one dumb line at her expense that made me laugh way harder than it had any right to, it would be:

"She works for Fudge."

"Sometimes she works for peanut brittle."

Umbridge isn't onscreen for the whole film however, and the riff does teeter on the brink of being same-old-same-old.  I mean, Order of the Phoenix is the first movie in the series that doesn't see or bring up Quiddich, but that doesn't stop them from getting a few jabs at the silly game they don't understand all the same.  And as always, there are plenty of jokes at the underlining Satanism of the subject matter.  There is a reliance on jokes we've heard before which makes Order of the Phoenix almost a lesser experience than it probably should have been.

It doesn't stop them from bringing some new silliness to the table, which really pulls Order of the Phoenix out of the dirt and dusts it off.  Mike starts off by retitling the movie "Harry Potter and the Enchanted Donkey Show," which is just goofy enough to make me giggle.  There are fun new jabs at the Dursleys, reminding us that at one point that Vernon and Petunia had sex and also mocking that Dudley was the subject of the Dementor's Kiss, as Mike would reveal "Dudley's first kiss with a human would go way worse."  Harry also has a lot of angst in this entry, and at one point Mike would point out "Harry hasn't been this upset since he found out Moaning Myrtle hid a webcam in his toilet."  There is a lot of getting confused at the twisty transitions through newspapers which leads to a little motion sickness.  And I couldn't help but go "HA!" at the one moment where Harry and the students are caught by Umbridge and they just blurt out "It was all Neville's idea!"  That's just beautiful.

Like the movie it's making fun of, this riff is far from a perfect experience, but it is an acceptable one and one that I enjoyed.  There are riffs to recommend over Order of the Phoenix to be certain, though I'd argue it's worth a look even if you're sick of Harry Potter.  Personally I'd say the experience may be enhanced if you're a Harry Potter fan, because there are a few obscure references that only Potter nerds would get (and the movie would be easier to follow), though that's not entirely necessary.  Order of the Phoenix is just funny enough to stand on its own two feet.

Good

As We Like It (RiffTrax Shorts)

RiffTrax Year:  2009

Riffers:  Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett

Beer.  I'm certain we've all needed it at one point or another to get through some of the movies featured on RiffTrax or Mystery Science Theater, so let's have a toast!

As We Like It assures us that we like beer and beer likes us!  We crave it, ingest it, make sweet love to it, vomit it up in the morning...circle of life.  It offers up a small peek at the alcohol industry, bartending, and how it gets to your crystal clear glass to both refresh you and ensure you need to call a cab for the ride home.  Have one, won't you?

I can't say I learned much from this short, which seems to be more of a propaganda piece to ensure that people keep buying beer and subliminally saying it's what you want right now, even if you're sober and going through AA.  There is not a lot of talk about how beer is made, a lot of still photos of breweries and bars, and also close ups of delicious frosty cold ones.  The intent of the short seems to be shoving this imagery in your face so you'll hit the bar on the way home.  I guess that works, because I'm thirsty.

Since this short doesn't offer much except random imagery, Mike, Kevin, and Bill aren't given much to do except latch onto a flashing image and try to project a joke on it.  Some of them hit (I like how the work industry is compared to cattle with simple mooing), while others tend to just be generic exclamations of "Beer is good!"  It's successful at mocking the underlining theme of the short though I confess that it becomes monotonous after a while.  Also the short features endless narration, which means a lot of the guys talking over it, which results in a lot of dialogue overlapped with dialogue.  There are smiles to be had here, but there isn't enough of an opportunity for comedy in this particular short.

Thumbs Down

👎

The Brain Eaters (The Mads)

Film Year:  1958

Genre:  Science Fiction, Horror

Director:  Bruno VeSota

Starring:  Leonard Nimoy (name misspelled), Ed Nelson, Alan Jay Factor, Cornelius Keefe, Joanna Lee, Jody Fair, David Hughes

Special Guest:  Carolina Hidalgo, Marcus Parks

The Movie

Invasion of the Body Snatchers eat your heart out, because The Brain Eaters are here to infect your heads with slugs that feast on the brain and control your mind.  It's up to the mighty 50's Caucasian scientists and law enforcement to get to the bottom of the secret invasion and save the day!

Produced by Roger Corman, one of the most noteworthy aspects of this film is how the filmmakers were sued by author Robert Heinlein (MSTies will know him as the screenwriter of Project Moon Base and RiffTrax fans will recognize him as the author of the original Starship Troopers novel) who claimed the film was too similar to a novel he wrote called The Puppet Masters.  No, not that Puppet Master, as awesome as killer dolls might have been in this movie.  That also dealt with an invasion of parasites that control the brain.  But if one wants to split hairs, another Corman film played with a similar concept in It Conquered the World.  Was a little mushroom alien all Corman needed to avoid lawsuit?

Though as it turned out a film adaptation of The Puppet Masters was cancelled because of The Brain Eaters.  Eventually a movie did get made in the 90's starring Donald Sutherland, but nobody cared.  Also there was Animorphs, which is the same thing only with kids who mutate into animals because why not?

Aside from this, The Brain Eaters is pure Corman hokum and padding, wasting what intrigue the premise could generate with dry scenes of actors looking grim.  The film shows people going through the motions of characters who understand that something weird is going on without understanding exactly what.  Certain scenes are suspenseful enough, and it provides decent mood pieces, though its all coming to a head in a goofy scene involving power cables and lightning bolts, which makes the final impression of the film more kooky than grim.  But there is an attempt here, I'll give it that.

Interestingly a young Leonard Nimoy has a pivotal exposition-supplying supporting role in the film.  Young Spock pops in in Gandolf the Grey cosplay to explain exactly what the movie is before disappearing as quickly as he appeared.  He's a welcome addition, since a science fiction production is always elevated by the presence of Nimoy even if they can't spell his name right in the opening credits.

The Riff

This movie has the flavor of Corman cheapies that Mystery Science Theater would show on season three or four, so this feels a bit homey to me and I imagine it does for Trace and Frank as well.  They're in high spirits throughout the riff, though I will say they throw out with a little too much gusto at times when the movie comes to a standstill.  There is a sequence where a brain-eating slug is crawling into a woman's bed and the movie is completely silent, and their response to this is to pack it with every joke they can think of.  Some of them land, some of them feel like they're just something to say to fill dead air.  It's tricky, but the laugh quota is high.

Frank is in a mood during this riff.  He spends portions letting out a lot of passion aggression on Christopher Nolan, as he hands out dark gritty reboots to the likes of Airwolf and Paul Blart:  Mall Cop.  Characters could be searching in the blackest woods causing Frank to pipe up "Existential Void Canyon isn't as much fun as I thought it would be," or we reach our climax as two lovers find themselves on opposite sides of the conflict, leading Frank to growl their frustration out as "You never want to eat brains or do anything experimental in bed!"  Trace is a bit calmer by comparison, and even though he isn't as thick and heavy with the movie as Frank is, his laughs are just as consistent.

In the aftershow, Movie Sign With the Mads co-host Carolina Hidalgo is back with her husband Marcus Parks.  Talk turns very movie heavy of course, because that what these folks do.  Since Halloween season is approaching, there is a lot of talk about horror movies which leaves Trace and Frank a bit in the wind.  Carolina and Marcus gush over the new Candyman (and I concur) and they have a discussion of what movies would be best to watch on Halloween.  Frank doesn't go full horror and recommends a few thrillers like Night of the Hunter and Sorcerer, while Trace goes the safe route and says Universal Horror is always good (this goes without saying, because they go with Halloween like pumpkin pie goes with Thanksgiving).  There is a chat question about underrated movies which actually gets a little sidetracked as Marcus instantly brings up the wonderful Starship Troopers (bringing it back to Robert Heinlein, even though nobody seems to realize this), but the discussion evolves into talk of Paul Verhoeven movies like RoboCop and Total Recall and just kind of peters away.

Speaking of Robert Heinlein properties, there is a little bit of discussion about the lawsuit on The Brain Eaters, which Frank uses as an opportunity to talk about Roger Corman suing Cinematic Titanic for their use of The Wasp Woman.  Incidentally this particular movie also got this live stream copyright struck on YouTube which meant they had to stream on Twitch.  The lawsuits just keep coming.  This movie is cursed.  The riff is worth watching though, however you can get your hands on it.

Good

Eggs to Market (RiffTrax Shorts)

RiffTrax Year:  2011

Riffers:  Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett

"An egg farm like this one..."

"...hides many a dead body."

What came first?  The Chicken of Tomorrow or the Egg of Today?  Answers will not be found here, which shows us the many steps of an egg farm, how much machinery laid off a good work force, and how it eventually reaches market so you can have your fancy pants poached egg.

Full disclosure, I hate eggs.  They're odd textured, have a gag-inducing smell, and just in general are an edible abortion on the breakfast table.  Uncracked eggs though are oddly cute.  Just little round simple white lumps that roll quite easily, can be dyed Easter colors, or put little trousers on and make them up to look like Don Rickles.  Eggs.  I don't get them but here they are.  This short is a fair look into the farming techniques it takes to get them from chicken to you, which is oddly simple and complicated at the same time.

"Oh yeah.  Right between the crack.  We know it's bad but that's the way I like it!"

"Who are you voicing there Bill?"

"Oh...you know...the collective eggs...they're kinda...perv..."

Eggs to Market is a simple little delight.  The short is mostly comprised of eggs rolling from one machine to another and Mike, Kevin, and Bill, like the eggs themselves, just roll with it.  There are plenty of jokes targeting chickens, eggs, and the gizmos that make up an egg farm, pointing out that something as simple as a suction cup puts dozens of people out of work.  There are jabs at the mundaneness of the subject matter being set to the tune of playful music and how odd the whole thing feels, which compliments the short quite well because it does boil down to being a bunch of eggs being stared at.  But staring at eggs has never been this much fun.

Thumbs Up

👍

Mystery Science Theater 3000: Volume XXII DVD Retrospective

Release Date:  December 11, 2011

Buy It Here!

Episodes Featured:

Time of the Apes

Mighty Jack

The Violent Years

The Brute Man

Also Featuring:

The Making of Mystery Science Theater 3000

Oh the Japanity!  Hot off the previous Gamera set we have another helping of Japanese deliciousness.  This set offers up a couple of Sandy Frank imports of Eiji Tsuburaya shows edited together into movies.  There are also a couple of dated black and white cheapies on back-up, including one written by the legendary Ed Wood!  Of the episodes, Time of the Apes and The Brute Man are just about even in greatness and if you asked me to pick between Japanese apes and the delicious Chicken of Tomorrow, then I might favor Brute Man.  The Violent Years is a very respectable third while Mighty Jack just isn't that mighty.

Average Rating (out of 4):  3.25

Audio and video are both solid.  Included in the set is an official special on the making of the series which aired on the Sci-Fi Channel during the eighth season.  The Making of Mystery Science Theater 3000 was used to promote the show after its move to the channel and offers up some cool behind the scenes footage and even exclusive jokes by Mike and the Bots.  We have some introductions here too, with one by Mary Jo Pehl, who discusses The Brute Man.  Japanese media historian August Ragone is back for two more intros, this time discussing Time of the Apes and Mighty Jack.  We also have a making of retrospective on The Brute Man and MST Hour wraps for Time of the Apes.  Rounding out the set is a special feature devoted to the DVD menus Rhino and Shout had been creating for the series.

The artwork reverts to the basic Shout art after switching it up the previous volume.  It's just the Mystery Science Theater logo in the upper left hand corner with the theater seats down at the bottom again, while the roman numerals XXII are painted in yellow and orange against a starry backdrop.  But we do have another selection of Steve Vance posters here to please our eyes as well!  Time of the Apes sees Crow and Tom Servo getting out of a cryo capsule only to find an army of apes looming above them.  Mighty Jack sees Servo dressed up as a Mighty Jack agent in the arctic, while Crow is a Q agent firing a gun above the title logo as a white cat chills next to him.  The Violent Years sees Crow and Servo dudded up as the bad girls of the film opening fire through a broken window.  The Brute Man sees Crow as the Creeper sneaking up on defenseless damsel Servo.

The disc art is basic logos against a starry backdrop.  DVD menus offer up more fun, which, as discussed in the bonus features, are little sketches in CG using episode audio.  Time of the Apes sees Crow and Tom Servo waking up in cryo capsules and monkeying around with Pepe.  Mighty Jack sees Servo playing with a ray gun and accidentally shooting Crow.  The Violent Years features Crow, Servo, and Gypsy attending a pajama party thrown by the movie's lead, where Crow reluctantly makes out with her.  The Brute Man sees Servo cooking eggs while Crow is romanced by the Creeper.

With three great episodes (some personal favorites), this is absolutely a set for the shelf.  And if you're a admirer of the Japanese arts, Eiji Tsuburaya, or what those crazy kids call "tokusatsu," then this set is a must-own for Time of the Apes and Mighty Jack just for the craziness of it all.  It's a blast full of laughs and any collection is just that much better with it in it.

The Making of Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K Special)

It wasn't abnormal for channels to produce little half-hour "making of" specials to help promote a series.  If I'm remembering correctly, Sci-Fi Channel used to do quite a few of them back in the late-90's which always gave the impression to me that they were really pushing a series to succeed.  Mystery Science Theater 3000 was one of the shows they made a special for and in comparison to Comedy Central's attempt at making one with This is MST3K, The Making of Mystery Science Theater 3000 is a much more satisfying experience.

Instead of handing the special to a host that threatens to take over the entire special with his personality like Penn Jillette, this special has a narrator (uncredited, but I'm assuming it's writer/director Anthony Caleca) who provides context when necessary and periodically hands it off to interviews with the cast and crew explaining how the show comes to be.  We also get to hear the premise explained through the crew's own words as opposed to a host talking to the audience under the presumption that they wouldn't understand.

But what truly sets this special apart from the previous one is the wealth of behind the scenes footage, which is abundant.  We don't just see clips from the show, we see footage of Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett performing Tom Servo and Crow under the stage as a comparison to each clip.  We see much more footage of Mike Nelson and his robot friends filming the theater segments.  We even see them talking about the sets and all the cheap crap that's on the walls.  There are so many neat little details that this special dives into and it's a pure joy.

The main issue of the special is that since it was aired in the middle of season eight, it's a little restrictive of what it can discuss.  A lot of the footage seen is of the same group of episodes from the first half of the first Sci-Fi Channel season.  However credit where credit is due, they do offer up footage of Comedy Central episodes, which is something I didn't expect them to do.  It's not a lot of footage and it's mostly host segments, but they do give us small clips from "Manos" The Hands of Fate, Attack of the The Eye Creatures, and The Crawling Eye (which is actually overdubbed for some reason).  It's a bit more effort than I would have expected from this as Sci-Fi's promotional material usually tended to not show anything from Comedy Central at all.

The cherry on top of this is that instead of Penn Jillette shouting nonsense at the screen, this special actually has Mike and the Bots watching some of the footage in their theater seats and throwing jokes that are exclusive to this special at it.  And they aren't half-hearted either, a lot of them are legitimately funny and true to the spirit of the show.  Also thrown in is some rare footage of some undercelebrated behind-the-scenes crew members at work such as prop diva Beez McKeever, cinematographer Jeff Stonehouse, make-up and hair stylist Andrea Ducane, and production manager Jill Roozenboom.  The Making of Mystery Science Theater 3000 has definitely aged better than the previous making of special on Comedy Central and is still worth a look today and not even just as a curiosity or a novelty.  There is stuff here that you genuinely won't get anywhere else and even a few laughs you might miss out on if you haven't seen it.

This is MST3K (MST3K Special)

This is MST3K was a half hour "making of" special produced for Comedy Central in which Penn Jillette of Penn & Teller fame (and then Comedy Central talking head host) explains the premise of Mystery Science Theater 3000 to the audience.  The format is kind of interesting, as there would be footage of Penn talking about the series in a manner that is not unlike Mike Nelson's parody of Jack Perkins in the Mystery Science Theater Hour only to be interrupted by another Penn Jillette who is watching the footage down below from silhouetted theater seats.  Penn's heckling doesn't tend to be very clever, with generic quips like "Your fly is open!" and whatnot, though it's all there to set up some behind the scenes footage of the series that not a lot of fans would get to see at the time.

The special is told in three parts.  The first section explains the concept of the show, as Penn relates the idea of taking a movie and talking over it (you know, in case the audience doesn't understand that it is possible to watch a movie without total silence), and he also tries to explain the premise of the show about Joel, his robots, and the mad scientists who torture them.  Between all of this is a bunch of talking head interviews with notable celebrities like Neil Patrick Harris, select newspaper critics, and even the executive producer of Cheers while also interviews with fans of the show on the street.  This is probably the most laborious portion of this special, as it tries really hard to sell and over-explain the series.  If you're already sold on it, you don't need this.

The second section is a bit more interesting, as we start to dive into how the show is put together and we get interviews with the cast and crew.  There are tidbits about writing jokes and what kind of films work and don't work and just how it's compiled into a whole.  This section also uses a lot of footage from the show, mostly as examples of how many jokes they can do in this comedic style and how many types.

Probably the most interesting segment (at least for fans back in the early 90's) is the final segment, where they discuss the origins of the show and how it came to be on Comedy Central.  While it's abridged and not in-depth, there is a lot here that's just interesting enough to hook a fan into wanting to know more.  They have footage of Joel's appearance on Saturday Night Live and how his LA stint led him back to Minneapolis and being approached by Jim Mallon for making something for KTMA.  They even use a small clip of KTMA footage for reference, which I'm sure not a lot of people had seen at the time.  They also discuss how they pitched the show to Comedy Central and got traction with it, and also close out with a look at the writers' room and filming the theater segments.  It's not a whole lot of info, but it's satisfying.

Flaws with the special is mostly regulated to Penn Jillette being a very overbearing host when he's onscreen.  I understand why he was used (and Penn is actually a fan of the series, to my understanding) though he has a tendency to talk down to the audience while he's selling it to them.  This might have worked for selling the show in the 90's, though it can be disruptive if you're already a fan.  There are also clips from first season episodes, but there is no mention of Josh/J. Elvis Weinstein during the special and they don't cover the Tom Servo actor switch.  I guess they don't need to, but some more acknowledgment of the show's history might have been nice.  Basically I'm just asking for less farting around and more information because that's what we're here for and we only have a half hour.

This is MST3K was a fun little novelty in the 90's but in the many years since it has become obsolete.  We have so many more features by Shout Factory overviewing the show that the scraps we were given back then don't cut it anymore.  But it's a nostalgic trip to see the series explored while it was still at its peak, so This is MST3K does have some historic value.

306-Time of the Apes

Film Year:  1987 (edited from a 1974 TV series)

Genre:  Science Fiction, Fantasy

Director:  Atsuo Okunaka, Kiyo Sumi Fukazawa

Starring:  Reiko Tokunaga, Hiroko Saito, Masaaki Kaji, Tetsuya Ushio, Badu Hatakeyama, Kazue Takita 

MST Season:  3

The Movie

A Japanese TV series evolved from the Planet of the Apes franchise?  You did it.  You finally really did it!

Of course this had to happen.  Why wouldn't it?  In the mid-70's, Planet of the Apes was so hot that other countries were bound to want their own versions, and Japan went to their most popular company for tokusatsu shows at the time, Tsuburaya Productions, best known for their Ultraman franchise and also the effects house that created the original Godzilla.  They create their own little lore for a future conquered by simians, though it's a rather childish and mostly complete nonsense.

Aired in Japan under the title of Army of the Apes, this series was about a pair of children named Johnny (originally Jiro) and Caroline (originally Yurika) who visit their uncle's science lab.  During an earthquake they and a lady scientist named Catherine (originally Kazuko) accidentally get frozen in cryogenic tubes and covered in rubble, which left them lost for generations.  They awaken in a future where apes have taken over society and aren't exactly friendly to humans (though oddly more accepting than those in the Planet of the Apes franchise).  They meet a human in the wild named Godo and a child ape named Pepe and the quintet live on the run from ape soldiers.

Around the time Army of the Apes was airing, Planet of the Apes also made a move to television with its own TV series in America (starring the series mainstay Roddy McDowall).  That series was an episodic "heroic misunderstood vagrant" series like The Fugitive, where the characters went from town to town, sometimes got into some mischief, but mostly fixed some local problem.  It wasn't a great show, but it was what TV at the time expected it to be even if it was too expensive to produce for the ratings it gathered.  Army of the Apes seems to be more serialized, as from what I can tell each episode led into the next and the whole series told one giant story.

This particular version is an import edit called Time of the Apes, where American producer Sandy Frank took all 26 episodes of Army of the Apes and whittled it down to an endless supply of chase scenes that barely make sense.  Humans wake up and there are apes!  Why are there apes?  Doesn't matter.  Just run!  They meet a guy named Godo.  Who is he?  Nobody cares.  He helps them.  Ape soldier wants Godo dead.  Is there a reason?  He doesn't really have one (not until the conclusion anyway).  He's a threat, so more running!  The apes are rebelling!  Why?  Who's to say?  But the ape in charge is like "Stop, please" and they're like "Okay."  There is a UFO in the sky!  Is it relevant to anything?  Not really.  But it will help write us out of a corner at the end.  It won't do it well, but it's something.

I have no idea if any of this is fleshed out more in the original Japanese series, but grinding away eleven hours into a lean ninety minutes is bound to lose something.  Time of the Apes is all action and no context.

Tokusatsu fans will likely look to this production just to see what a Tsuburaya version of Planet of the Apes might look like.  The apes in this movie aren't as expressive as John Chambers' impressive make-up from the original Planet of the Apes films as Army of the Apes looked more like slightly mobile gorilla masks.  The one thing I will give the ape design here is that the main apes all look distinct from each other.  Planet of the Apes usually relied on the actors to make each ape distinguishable from the next, but here there is more effort to make each ape look different than the previous, which does wonders for character distinction.  Less effort is put into ape extras (which was true for Planet of the Apes as well), but there is a clear effort here.  Both the series and the resulting film re-edit are silly as hell, but there are a few things worth praising here.

The Episode

Being a Planet of the Apes fan, I always find myself thinking fondly of Time of the Apes.  I might have a slight bias as a non-apologetic lover of dystopian simian fantasy and tokusatsu though.  Should I recommend this episode to the average MSTie?  Maybe.  I do think it's quite funny even if the movie is frantic nonsense.  The KTMA version succumbs to that frantic nonsense and the riffing kind of seemed like a loss for words.  Given that this third season revisit is much more planned out than that vintage episode, there is definitely stronger material being tossed at the film, flung like apes with poo in their hands.

The answer is yes, there are a lot of poo flinging jokes.  Bear with that or just sit back and have a giggle.

One would expect there to be more Planet of the Apes references in this episode, but aside from a mention or two of "Ape Law" there isn't really much to write about.  The confounding plotting of the movie is more of a target, while there are more monkey jokes than anything.  Our characters are one-note, though the riffers take particular target at the character of Johnny and they turn his introductory line of "I don't care!" into his entire personality.  It works for Johnny's character, because he's a bit brash and really doesn't seem to care about the consequences of his actions.

"I don't want to be killed by a monkey!"

"I want to die by my own hand!"

And of course the episode starts a rather targeted disdain for American producer Sandy Frank, who imported this and several other Japanese shows and movies to America and edited them into VHS tapes for the children's market then kindly licensed them to this show for mockery.  Obviously he is our enemy.  Joel and the Bots take the theme for Time of the Apes and dub over it with their own song giving Sandy Frank the business.  Honestly even back when I first watched this episode I thought it was kind of mean and a bit aimless, but I like Joel's dance, so there's that.  Other host segments take more specific aim at the movie as Servo gives a presentation on why "Johnny Doesn't Care," an Ape fashion show, and a debate on ape/man evolution, which are a bit stronger and add to the flavor of the episode.  I also like them breaching the hull by playing baseball during the opening, which is cute and fun.  The Invention Exchange has Joel's cellulite phone and Dr. Forrester and Frank playing god with Miracle Baby Growth Formula.

One small thought I had while watching the Invention Exchange is how the baby they used would be just barely 30 now.  I wonder what he's up to these days?  And if he knows his parents pawned him off to a puppet show for a day?  The credits list him as Eli Kenneth Mallon.  Jim Mallon's son?

Fans of Japanese cheese and Planet of the Apes alike will find stars aligning on this episode, as it's a gold mine of an incomprehensible rip-off film and mockery of it.  Those who actually watch the show and hope to actually follow the plot of a goofy movie will be left in the wind, because there is not really one here.  The laughs are strong and if one is willing to keep pace with the film they will find themselves rewarded with solid laughs.  I'm personally not waiting for others to keep up so I'll call this a series highlight.

Classic

"I don't care!"

The DVD

We awoke in the Time of the Apes in Shout Factory's Volume XXII collection, with good audio and video.  The disc features an interview with Japanese media historian August Ragone discussing the history of the project and how it was born out of the popular airings of Planet of the Apes in Japan.  He also covers the pedigree behind the film and how it was surprisingly strong for a show of this type.  Also included are MST Hour segments.

Frankenhooker (The Last Drive-In)

Film Year:  1990

Genre:  Comedy, Horror, Science Fiction

Director:  Frank Henenlotter

Starring:  James Lorinz, Patty Mullen, Louise Lasser

The Movie

From the director of Basket Case and Brain Damage comes what is probably his masterpiece.  Frankenhooker tells the tale passed on between generations about a woman named Elizabeth Shelley (Frankenstein fans will get it) who is accidentally dismembered by a lawnmower.  Unable to move on from the tragedy, her boyfriend, Jeffery Franken, is determined to bring her back to life.  Jeffery hits the streets to find local prostitutes to find the perfect body and stitch Elizabeth's head onto it, only through a string of accidents finds himself with the bodyparts of many to stitch together and create the perfect girlfriend.  Finally he reanimates Elizabeth but finds her personality has been replaced with the echoes of the sex workers she has been stitched together from, and she escapes from the lab to find clients.

Frankenhooker is one of those titles that is strictly a cult film but finds itself referenced relatively often in mainstream media, which gives it some level of credibility even though most people who have heard the title might not have actually watched the movie.  It's definitely a title I was aware of and knew I was going to watch some day, but it was never opportune for me to actually sit down with it.  Frank Henenlotter's other films were interesting and amusing enough, but I'd be lying if I was overtly enthusiastic about them as they ended.  Especially Basket Case, which tends to leave a viewer with a feeling of "Okay I'm done watching movies for the day" as they turn off the TV.

I didn't expect to be utterly in love with this movie once I finally watched it.  Frankenhooker is an absolute blast of camp, absurdity, and laughs.  What a wild ride.

With my history as a Mystery Science Theater 3000 fan, the first film that was echoing in my brain as I watched Frankenhooker unfold was The Brain That Wouldn't Die.  It's pretty much the same idea, as a boyfriend preserves a disembodied head of their lover in hopes to reanimate them and goes on the hunt for fine female bodies.  What sets Frankenhooker apart is its tone.  The Brain That Wouldn't Die is bleak and voyeuristic, with a protagonist who is a bit of a scuzzbucket.  Frankenhooker is wacky, comedic, and cartoonish, and while his desires of chopping off a whore's head is questionable, one sympathizes with Jeffery's heartbreak a lot more.  I'd hesitate to say I'm rooting for Jeffery though I see where he's coming from.

If one has seen Henenlotter's other work, one might know what to expect from Frankenhooker.  For the most part it's a more stomachable presentation of his style throughout the film, as while it's his trademark oddball tone it's also not aggressively gross.  It's a bit more absurdist, as the film is played for far more laughs at how excessive it gets, mostly peaking in a near orgy scene where a bunch of prostitutes explode after using poisoned drugs.  It doesn't look realistic in the slightest, but it was never going ever be considered realistic so the movie uses that to its advantage.

This all leads to the climax of the film, where they unveil Frankenhooker in all of her glory.  Played by Penthouse model Patty Mullen, she plays the title character like a short-circuiting robot:  moving stiffly, twitching her face in odd gestures, and bellowing streetwalker phrases "WANNA DATE?" and " LOOKIN' FOR SOME ACTION?"  The movie steamrolls into an outstanding climax where she breaks out of the lab and tries to pick up men, only to make anybody she hooks up with explode.  The Frankenhooker sequence is what we're here for and it delivers, only getting more enrapturing as it gets more absurd.  This is how to deliver on your title even if you're working on a low budget.  Take notes, everyone.

I left Frankenhooker with only one question on my mind...how did Basket Case get two sequels but Frankenhooker never got one?  There were way more places to go with this story in the aftermath, and I'm much more invested in the further adventures of Jeffery and Elizabeth.  I mean, a Sapphic-erotic Bride of Frankenhooker almost writes itself.

The Drive-In

Joe Bob has an old friend at the Drive-In today.  Director Frank Henenlotter, who helmed this movie, Basket Case, and Brain Damage, is here to talk about his horror-comedy creative process.  Joe Bob hails him as the only director that they've shown three movies from on The Last Drive-In.  I don't know if this is strictly true.  Off the top of my head, he had a Phantasm marathon years ago which featured three films directed by Don Coscarelli.  It's possible that those might be the only two though.  And Henenlotter could take the lead if Joe Bob ever shows Basket Case 2 & 3.

The behind the scenes info on Frankenhooker is plentiful, as he talks about the origins of the film as he had Fangoria editor Robert Martin working on a novelization of Brain Damage and they decided to write a script together, which turned into Frankenhooker.  He also discusses how the MPAA initially rejected the rating because "They didn't have an S-rating.  S for shit!"  Henenlotter discusses his being influenced by The Brain That Wouldn't Die and how that film's director, Joseph Green, met Henenlotter and said he heard that he was plagiarized by his movie.  Gloriously, Henenlotter showed the movie to Green, who absolutely loved it.  They also discuss some of the more absurd scenes in the film, trying to make sure Jeffrey wasn't a villain and Joe Bob praises his "symphony of exploding hos."  Henenlotter also gifts Joe Bob one of the dismembered breasts from the film too.

It's not often that you can say that you were given your own personal boob as a gift.

Later on they bring out the movie's star, James Lorinz, who discusses his beginnings in the film Street Trash (oh jesus, they had to remind me of Street Trash) and how that film led to Frankenhooker.  They also turn to discussion of Patty Mullen as soon as the focus of the film starts to focus on Frankenhooker herself.  They talk about how Henenlotter was hesitant about casting a Penthouse Pet for the title role because he wanted a "girl-next-door" type, only to find Mullen was exactly what he was looking for.  They also discuss Frankenhooker's ability to make men explode and Joe Bob asks the silliest question in that he wants Henenlotter to explain the logic behind that.  There is also mention that Mullen wears a "fat suit" at the beginning of the film to imply she had a different body when she was Frankenhooker but the audience didn't notice (I can't see it myself).

Before he leaves, Henenlotter drops the bombshell that he wanted to remake 13 Ghosts.  I have to say, a Henenlotter 13 Ghosts remake would undoubtedly be better than the remake we eventually got.

Darcy in particular is excited about the screening of this movie on this show, because Frankenhooker is one of her favorite movie.  She's so excited that she cosplays Frankenhooker for the final segment.  This episode then turns into a bit of a Valentine to Darcy herself, as Joe Bob reads a touching letter at the end from a viewer who says the show and the community helped him through a divorce, a pandemic, and his father's death, which they use to springboard how much she works to bring the Drive-In Mutants together on social media.  That doesn't stop Joe Bob from specifically targeting Darcy during his bizarre rant on "smelling stores," which Darcy says she doesn't know what he's talking about.  But whatever the rant, Frankenhooker is definitely a flick worthwhile to watch and wreck any Valentine's Day with.

Joe Bob's Rating

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Black Roses (The Last Drive-In)

Film Year:  1988

Genre:  Horror, Comedy

Director:  John Fasano

Starring:  John Martin, Ken Swafford, Julie Adams, Carla Ferrigno, Frank Deitz

The Movie

Mystery Science Theater 3000 fans may recognize John Fasano as the screenwriter of Zombie Nightmare (which also starred Frank Deitz) and also director of the RiffTrax featured film Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare (which also featured Deitz and Zombie Nightmare star John Mikl Thor).  A year after both those films he directed this movie, which has a band called Black Roses coming to a small town and playing three nights of concerts.  The parents of the city are furious, desiring the band be banned from playing for "satanic music."  Little do they know that Black Roses is actually a real satanic cult and is actually using their music to turn the teenagers of each town into literal demons.

Black Roses is a bit of an "on-the-nose" satire of the scrutiny heavy metal music met in the 80's.  It takes the criticism of "the devil's music" and takes it literally, having the music literally be an act of corruption for all who listen to it.  It's a very base premise, but it sets up some wildly entertaining stuff, as our young cast subtly moves from normal teen to threatening force of hell throughout the film.  While acting is about to be expected for a Troma release (and the entire cast of "teens" is pushing 30), the cast compiled for these sequences do quite well with the chaos they're spreading.  And the movie certainly does get chaotic as the premise gets more out of control the further in, almost to the point of just being gratuitous murder and mayhem, and some sex thrown in for good measure.

I'd almost say that the movie demands to be bigger, because there is a certain something here that could be expanded upon if it had more money.  That being said, I also concede that the film does run the risk of losing its charms if that were to happen.  There some neat make-up and puppet effects spread throughout the film, all of which aren't exactly realistic but a lot of fun to watch and add a lot of personality to the film.  Things like the climax do stumble around a bit, with hokey sound effects that amount to a "Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots" style punch fight between our hero and a demon. and the demons being terrorized by a fire feels absurd as one would picture actual hellbeasts would be at home in flames.

Black Roses has a lot going for it though and it's a low budget charmer.  I had a blast watching it and I'd watch it again.  It's a pretty good ride if you're into movies distributed by Troma that are a little bit rock and roll.

The Drive-In

I think it goes without saying that last year's Valentine's Day counterprograming double feature was a triumphant success, with the absolute power pairing of Tammy and the T-Rex and The Love Witch helping fuel it.  It makes sense that The Last Drive-In returns this Valentine's Day for another double feature for those who like their love holidays full of blood red colors.  First up on our Valentine's Day is a bouquet of Black Roses, which unlike last year's offerings isn't really a horror movie underlined by romance.  It does have a fair bit of sex in it, which probably counts for something.

The film seems to have been selected by Joe Bob's guests tonight, the Boulet Brothers!  I had never heard of them before this episode but they are a pair of drag queens who host a horror-themed reality show called Dragula.  I don't watch many reality competitions anymore, but the Boulets are very entertaining guests with a lot of colorful things to say.  They discuss how they got their start, which is just as raunchy as you'd hope, and share tidbits on the making of Dragula.  I have no idea what half of what they're saying means, but their show sounds crazy.

Joe Bob and the Boulets also discuss the film of course.  Joe Bob is interested in relating behind the scenes knowledge and talks about the origins of several castmembers, including his resume listing of actors up to and including the late Julie Adams, who isn't in this movie for very long but most will know and love from one of the greatest monster movies ever made, Creature from the Black Lagoon.  He is also a little obsessed with the fact that Carla Ferrigno, wife of bodybulder and TV's Incredible Hulk Lou Ferrigno, is in this movie and he doesn't understand why she's in this movie.  The Boulets talk more about what is onscreen, like the creature effects and what they think looks good or not.  They get into a discussion of the effect of a record demon that sucks a guy up into a speaker, which looks like a puppet that more-or-less resembles Shin Godzilla.  They're a bit split on the effect, but they all seem to agree that they love the sequence.

Black Roses isn't too much of a romantic movie for this years festivities, which is a downer, but according to Joe Bob's Drive-In Totals it does feature "Gratuitous Walt Whitman," so I'm going to give it a pass.  Joe Bob will tie in more to the holiday with tonight's second feature, Frankenhooker, so stay tuned for a horror themed romance to remember.  But one of the reasons Black Roses is worth remembering as an episode is that it concludes with a metal music video featuring Joe Bob, Darcy, and the rest of the Drive-In gang.  It's a treat that isn't to be missed.

Joe Bob's Rating

⭐⭐⭐