705-Escape 2000

Film Year:  1983
Genre:  Action
Director:  Enzo G. Castellari
Starring:  Mark Greggory, Henry Silva, Valerie Dobson, Antonio Sabato
MST Season:  7

The Movie

“You must leave the Bronx!”

This low budget, Italian 80’s action movie wannabe is actually the second installment of a supposed trilogy, following up a film called 1990:  The Bronx Warriors and in turn followed by a flick called The New Barbarians.  I’m not sure if Escape 2000 (AKA Escape from the Bronx) is the worst of these, but if this movie is anything to go by, the rest of the series probably didn’t amount to much.

In this movie the Bronx has been targeted for demolition and all the residents are being forced out of their homes by the latest generic evil corporation made up for a movie.  Those who refuse to leave will die, and a lady reporter vows to reveal the truth to the world.  She teams up with tank-top-wearing Trash (you know you’re trying too hard to come up with an action hero name when…), the eternally cackling Dablone, and a group of underground resistance to kidnap the corporate president because hostage situations always end well.

Yes, this is one of those really stupid movies where the government is corrupt and the only way to survive is terrorism…er I mean “fighting back.”  Kind of like those garbage Hunger Games or Maze Runner movies, only more endearing.  It’s kind of hard to really get interested in the story, because our villains, a corrupt politician and an evil corporation, kill people mercilessly to basically try and make the neighborhood a better place, and our “heroes” who are fighting back are hard to root for because they basically want to keep their residential area a garbage wasteland full of violence.  Granted our bad guy corporation is being a dick about the whole thing in murdering civilians (with FIRE AND TORCHES no less), but I’m more inclined to side with them.  At least they're doing something productive, while our "good guys" are fighting for their right to lounge around in a dump.

Shoddy production tries its damnedest to deliver the action goods, but when your movie looks cheaper than a Cannon production maybe you shouldn’t bother.  Not to mention it’s odd to use the word “Escape” so prominently in your title when your characters are actually fighting to stay, not leave.  On the plus side, the movie has an unapologetic punk rock edge to it.  Whether or not it knows how ridiculous it looks is up in the air, but it has a confident stride to it that makes it likable.  It doesn’t make it not terrible, but it’s got some things going for it.

The Episode

Here we have the penultimate episode of the Comedy Central era of MST, and it’s a delightful one.  80’s cheese is almost never a recipe for disaster, and the crew manages to bake yet another tasty cheesecake out of a goofy movie.  Mike, Servo, and Crow seem to be enjoying this one a lot and have fun playing with its inanity.  There’s nothing about the production that’s a slog, and we just go limp and run with the current of the movie, and the results are golden.

First thing you’ll notice off the bat about the host segments are that a handful of them are devoted to setting the Satellite of Love on fire.  There might be a passive attitude going down after the show’s cancelation saying “Meh.  If the set burns, it burns.”  The non-pyromania host segments don’t fare very well by comparison.  The opening auction, for example, is cute but never funny.  That said, I really do enjoy Dr. Forrester’s take on “putting mother in a home.”  And I absolutely LOVE Mike at the end as Dablone.

“I hear of a Jack-in-the-Box but…I NEVER HEAR OF A LADY-IN-THE-BOX!”

It’s too bad that Dablone never managed to be a recurring guest character, like Torgo.  I think he had it in him, and our gang on the show clearly love the guy (it definitely looks like Mike is having a blast).  But as is, this one dip into the land of Dablone is a good one, and it’s always worth going back just to see him again.

Note:  This is the last time a fan letter was read on the classic series (each episode is the funniest ever and confusion over where the bots sleep).  The Sci-Fi era had a callback in Deadly Mantis where the SOL crew read a letter from fictional character Peanut the ape, but other than that this was it.  Letters would later return in select episodes of the revival series.

Good

The DVD

Escape 2000 finally left the Bronx and currently resides in Shout Factory’s Volume XXXVII collection, with solid audio and video.  The episode is given a lengthy introduction by Mary Jo Pehl, who talks about her then new movie selection job, the wacky host segments about putting Perl in a “home,” and Trace’s line in the episode that she considers an all-time favorite.

Next up we have a documentary titled, what else, Leave the Bronx:  Making Escape 2000.  The feature is pretty much just an interview with film historian Chris Poggiali, who discusses how the success of films like The Road Warrior and Escape from New York led to films like Escape 2000.  He talks a bit in-depth about the cast and influences.

Finally there is an anamorphic widescreen trailer for the film, under the original title of Escape from the Bronx.