Poopie Parade of Values (MST3K Special)

*Warning:  Offer No Longer Valid.  Phone number may or may not be phone sex hotline now.

Probably one of the slighter little corners of Mystery Science Theater history is Poopie Parade of Values, a little infomercial Mike, Kevin, and Trace put on for Turkey Day 1995, which advertised home video products being sold by Best Brains Inc. directly.  Up for sale is the half hour MST3K blooper reel tape Poopie! and in addition to it is the MST Scrapbook tape of series highlights and behind the scenes footage, and if you buy both you can have them for the low, low price of only $30 (a $37.50 value)!

Being the comedians that they are, Mike, Kevin, and Trace don't just sell their tapes, but put on a delightful little parody of infomercials in general.  Kevin puts on his best Bob Vila fake laugh and smile while Mike enters and they mock the phony pleasantness of the artform in between sharing clips of the Scrapbook and blooper reels.  But things really spice up once Trace enters the picture, as he puts on the fakest of Australian accents and demonstrates how the tapes perfectly fit into a VCR, much to Mike and Kevin's amazement.  While the rest of the infomercial was pleasant enough, that was the one moment where I let out an audible laugh.

Outside of historical curiosity, there isn't much in Poopie Parade of Values to actively recommend.  It's just a scant 17 minutes long and a fairly amusing look at these guys selling products that are now out of print.  But Best Brains would branch out a bit, selling more tapes of their own making to fans.  They would start doing host segment compilations, tapes of popular songs from the series, and in some cases full episodes themselves.  This was only the beginning of MST on home media, as the following year Rhino Home Video would begin releasing VHS tapes of the series into retail stores (including Poopie!), which would begat them releasing episodes on DVD, which would begat Shout Factory acquiring the DVD license, which would begat Shout Factory buying the series outright, which would begat the show's revival in 2017.  In a weird way Poopie Parade of Values is the beginning of a domino effect that would ensure Mystery Science Theater 3000 would endure for years to come.

And Poopie Parade of Values may not be much, but it's a testament to the fact that we wanted to immortalize this show on home media way back in 1995 if nothing else.

Satellite Dishes (MST3K Specials)

Well it was bound to happen, Shout Factory ran out of episodes.  Almost.  Rights issues has backed Shout Factory into a corner, as remaining episode titles had certain entanglements that prevented them from being released (as of Volume XXXIX).  I'll spare you the legal mumbo jumbo, maybe I'll get into it at a later date, but Shout came up with the solution of if we can't have the entire episode, then maybe we can at least have the host segments!  Host segment compilations aren't new, as Best Brains used to sell video tapes titled Tom Servo's All-Time Favorite Host Segments, which were rather popular among MSTies in the mid-90's.  This one is just devoted to episodes that may never see the light of day on DVD.

Though that final statement needs an asterisk next to it.  It's looking likely one day Quest of the Delta Knights will see a physical release, as it has already been released digitally.  There is also a shot that Fire Maidens of Outer Space, The Deadly Bees, and The Space Children will see the light of day as well, while the others are more in the "When hell freezes over camp."  So one day a good chunk of this set will be obsolete, but until then, enjoy!

Interestingly enough, this compilation doesn't include the episode Godzilla vs. Megalon.  Technically this episode did see a DVD release, but it was infamously pulled due to Rhino Home Video (MST's then-home-media-distributor) failing to properly secure the rights to the movie, while Shout never released the episode at all.  It feels like it should be included here, but is left out for whatever reason.  There might have been an issue with footage of the movie being used in the Rex Dart:  Eskimo Spy sketch, but that might be a grey area and I don't know whether or not that's fair use (the use of Godzilla in the opening credits seems to be unchallenged, so...).

Rocketship X-M

I laughed often during the host segments, which introduce us to Tom Servo's new voice and TV's Frank, replacing the now MIA Dr. Erhardt.  Frank in particular is quite hilarious here, as he plays the role of an awkward trainee at a fast food restaurant who doesn't quite know what he's doing.  The biggest laugh of the episode is the very end in which the very first "Push the button, Frank" happens, and Frank can't quite figure it out.  This bit actually is probably funnier now than it was then, since Frank wound up pushing that button many times in his career and seeing him learn it for the first time is quite a treat.  On the Satellite, we're given one treasure of a host segment as Joel quizzes the Bots on things that are funny floating in space, meanwhile the salute to reporters segment is quite fun too.  The big loser to single out is Mike's cameo as Valaria from Robot Holocaust, which starts nowhere and somehow gets lost along the way.

Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster

The best segment is the catchy Godzilla Genealogy Bop, which chronicles the thunder lizard’s family tree.  The space madness sketch has some laughs, and there are a lot of cool drawings in the final sketch.  The Invention Exchange is a simple delight, as Joel and the Mads invent new types of guitars that look really neat (Joel’s is mind controlled while the Mads’ are made of squeak toys).  Probably the closest to a dud is the visit from Mothra, which is neat but never really takes off.  Mike does the voice of the giant moth, but his turn as Gamera next season is much more memorable.

The Amazing Colossal Man

The host segments are a fair standard.  They're all charming and there's not really a loser in the bunch.  Mike has a wonderful guest spot as Glenn the Colossal Man and Crow and Servo get some wonderful pot shots at Joel during an exchange where they learn about tact ("And we know if you HAD breath mints you'd use them!").  The Invention Exchange offers a cute magic trick turning Kevin into a talking plant, while Joel turns a children's toy into a "Non-Permanent Tattoo" device.

It Conquered the World

The host segments are mostly forgettable, with top prize being the solid skit where Servo narrates a Snow Thrills parody.  There’s an intentionally off-key song that doesn’t really rank among the series’ best, however that particular segment does include a fourth wall “wink-wink” where Servo questions the direction of the skit and Joel whispers to him that the movie is running short, so they need to pad the episode out.  Lackluster segments include a Servo and Crow bicker session and Joel trying to use Crow as a ventriloquism puppet named Peanut (and if this episode weren’t from the early 90’s, I would have sworn the “puppet named Peanut” was a reference to comedian Jeff Dunham).  The episode closes out with Peter Graves final speech being repeated over and over again, which is one of those gags which is funny at first, grows tiresome, then becomes funny again because of how long it goes on.  Invention Exchange involved a hanging man’s noose Halloween costume and the Sony Sea-man.

Fire Maidens of Outer Space

There is a dark force invading the Satellite of Love...a dark specter named Timmy has taken the form of Crow and creeping around.  Timmy initially acts like Crow's friend, but acts increasingly more hostile as the episode goes on:  attacking Cambot, telling Crow the wrong things to say, and messing with the controls to everything in existence.  The theater segments even get in on letting the story unfold as Timmy sneaks into the theater and sits in silence for most of the third theater segment, eventually attacking Tom Servo.  All of this leads to a host segment that parodies Aliens where Joel fights Timmy ("Get away from him, you bitch!") and blasts him out the airlock.  This is really one of the most enjoyable host segment arcs in the history of the show.

Also as a minor note of episode importance, the letter read at the end was written by a girl named Ashley, who compares Tom Servo to her brother.  Ashley grew up to be a musician and was invited by Joel to participate in the Kickstarter that helped relaunch the series during the 2015 Turkey Day as well as the concluding Kickstarter live telethon.

Attack of the The Eye Creatures

The only host segment I’d say goes the full mile is the “They just didn’t care segment!” that closes out the episode, with a montage of visible flaws in the movie (“Take a look at this guy!  Take a good long look!”).  I mostly enjoyed the prop comedy of the third segment, however the Rip Taylor impressions make it feel loud and overly long.  I also kind of enjoy Tom’s desire to make out, even if I felt it kind of dwindled.  The rest of the host segments flounder.  The Earl Holliman segment just doesn’t do it for me, and while Joel’s funny gag fax machine ends with a cute Three Stooges style gag, the Invention Exchange is a bit of a loser (though I do like the creativity of the Router Ouija Board).

Terror from the Year 5000

The host segments are all delights, including the lovely song "When I Held Your Brain in My Arms" by the Observers.  Other amusing Observer bits include the Observer's forcing Pearl and Bobo to fight while failing to make Mike and the Bots do the same and also their evolved food in pill form (which honestly tickles me to no end).  Meanwhile, Crow acquires a time machine and uses it to woo Mike's ex-girlfriend Ginger Sssssssssssssssssnapop and the Terror, as played by Beez McKeever.

I Was a Teenage Werewolf

Pearl has shut off the Satellite of Love's protective systems so she, Bobo, and the sole surviving Observer can go camping, which leaves Mike and the Bots fending for themselves against alien infestation.  These segments delight with their parodies of the Alien franchise, featuring Servo with a facehugger before going full space marine and climbing into the ducts to fight more creatures (before breaking down and crying), while Mike tries to deal with all the alien eggs by making a giant omelet.  These segments are really fun and a genuine highlight of season 8's story arc.  

The Deadly Bees

The Bowler Hat Guy from the movie becomes a recurring gag during the end scenes, in which Jim Mallon wanders into the host segments with a Bowler Hat and interrupts them, tipping his hat as he walks by.  What does he interrupt?  Not a whole lot on the Satellite, which is mostly just random, goofy skits like Mike portraying the body movement of bees or Crow reading a sonnet to Hargrove's wife.  At Castle Forrester, it's another story, as the Observers return to take our Observer with them to rebuild their society.  I like the idea of this storyline, but I feel it's underdone.  It's told with minimal screentime and mostly seems to be present so they can set up a silly song in the middle of the episode (which isn't particularly great, in my opinion).  I thought the climactic mind battle between the observers was cute, but I can't help but feel there could be more done with this story and it became mostly a throwaway.

Highlighting the host segments is the intro segment, which dishes out "Previously on the Satellite of Love..." while Mike and the Bots play out a bunch of cliched soap operatics that would have happened if the show were a drama.  It's probably one of the best host segments of the entire series.

The Space Children

Host segments are a mixed bag.  They get stronger as the episode goes on, with an alien trying to take Servo’s nuke being the highlight of the episode for me, though Crow’s Jackie Coogan fashion show is pretty funny as well.  Servo’s kissing booth is a middle of the road “I don’t really know what to make of this” segment, while the big clunker of the lot is Mike imitating the guy from the short.

Quest of the Delta Knights

Host segments are definite highlights, and they obviously lead off the episode gimmick of Pearl being in the theater.  Pearl is unhappy with the pain that Mike is receiving from the movies and wants to witness what is wrong from the inside.  Meanwhile Mike pals around with Bobo and Observer with some “guy talk” and gossip.  Other segments prove to be just as good, with a song from an all Servo choir and a visit from Leonardo da Vinci (who hates Servo).  My favorite segment is the intro, in which Crow breaks down and Mike and Servo are forced to use a “Loaner Crow.”  Loaner Crow may be one of my all-time favorite characters on the show with what little screen time he has.

The DVD

Satillite Dishes was brought to us on Shout Factory's Volume XXXIX collection.  Audio and video quality was uneven.  Most of the footage looks fine, but It Conquered the World, Terror from the Year 5000, I Was a Teenage Werewolf, and The Deadly Bees look and sound fairly below par, with dim video and scratchy audio.  Meanwhile Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster has tape hits abound.

There was a bonus feature on the disc, called Behind the Scream.  This is an interview with Daniel Griffith, who creates the Ballyhoo documentaries for the MST DVD box sets.  He talks about getting into documentaries by creating one on K. Gordon Murray, and attracting the attention of Shout Factory and creating these little documentaries for the DVD releases.

601-Girls Town

Film Year:  1959

Genre:  Drama

Director:  Charles F. Haas

Starring:  Mamie Van Doren, what lies in front of Mamie Van Doren, what lies behind Mamie Van Doren (Gigantor?), just all of Mamie Van Doren, also Mel Torme and Paul Anka (and Harold Lloyd Jr. and Charles Chaplin Jr.?)

MST Season:  6

The Movie

Listen to me girls, watch your P's and Q's,

Boy you're gonna have the Girls Town blues!

Hey, Mamie!  It's been a while!  We haven't seen you since you were an Untamed Youth!  Oh you still are an Untamed Youth?  Well that's because you haven't gone to Girls Town!  This film sees the the endowed sex symbol as a 16-year-old (yeah right) named Silver framed for the death of a boy she stood up on the night he was killed.  She is sentenced to Girls Town, a house for troubled girls who need guidance.  But her wild ways has her butting heads with the head nuns and the straight-laced girls at the school.

For a good long while Girls Town isn't a bad movie, just very simple.  It's got a cute story of the bad girl surrounded by morality, even though it's funny that it portrays the supposed rule-followers as the bullies, while Madam Van Doren is the poor girl with an attitude getting picked on, but it's kind of fun in a role reversal sort of way.  The worst this movie has going for it is a subplot involving a sociopathic resident who has a crush on a singer played by blossoming singer Paul Anka, and goes full blown delusional in her devotion to him.  While her suicidal storyline does have give some urgency in the plot of the movie down the road, it can be a bit over the top at times.  And it's final solutions to her delusions?  Become a nun.  That cures psychosis right up!

I kind of want to see the thriller sequel to this movie where this character deals with a sort of Norman Bates style disorder while living at Girls Town.  Now THAT'S a movie!

The movie doesn't get too out of control until its third act, which throws a lot of nonsense into the mix.  In addition to Paul Anka, another hot singer of the time, Mel Torme, has a role in this movie.  Torme plays the villain of the piece, as he is the only witness to the crime, figures out that the sister to Van Doren's character is the actual culprit just as she coincidentally hitches a ride with him, takes her to a drag race for some reason where some other punk gets killed, then they get chased by the police, only to have her get caught making her a witness to his crime, only for him to kidnap her again and plan to highjack her to Tijuana so he doesn't get fingered.  This is one hell of a convoluted plot point and the movie just throws it at the audience.  Luckily Van Doren and the ladies of Girls Town break out to the rescue!

Weirdly enough this movie stars the namesake sons of two silent film legends, Harold Lloyd and Charlie Chaplin, both of which died young in their 40's and both have Girls Town as one of their final credits.  Harold Lloyd Jr. even plays the ill-fated Chip, the masher who falls off a cliff and springs the plot into motion.  Chaplin Jr. plays some dude named Joe.  With both of these legacy children in the film, it has to be intentional casting.  But that legacy is likely lost on the 50's teen audience, who don't give a flying fig about dirty old silent comedy.  Girls Town is just a silly movie to stimulate a teenager's rebellious side while surrounding it with the comforts of 1950's conformism to hopefully keep them in check.  Who knows if it worked, but they got to see Mamie strut her stuff so I doubt anybody complained.

The Episode

I think it's probably worth saying that Girls Town is the I Accuse My Parents of the Mike era.  It's a weird little teen drama that feature some deceptive protagonists who don't really take responsibility for their own actions.  Girls Town isn't quite as bizarrely misguided as I Accuse My Parents, but both feature wildly funny riffing just the same.  Girls Town targets things you'd expect, such as Mamie Van Doren's measurements and the all-girl setting bringing a bunch of chatterbox, cat fight, and girl talk riffs.  But Girls Town is also echoes I Accuse My Parents in the way it treats Paul Anka's stalker, as they endow further delusions of her relationship to Anka upon her, and it's pretty hilarious.  I'm also a sucker for un-nunly riffs on nun characters, of which this riff has plenty, while neither Paul Anka nor Mel Torme get out without a scratch.

And, of course, Mamie's swiveling hips bring Mike fond memories of "Gigaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnntor!"

The season six premiere also brings about the Umbilicus to the series, a sort of tether that Dr. Forrester attaches to Gypsy to better connect the Satellite of Love to Deep 13.  The purpose of it?  Ehhhhh...debatable.  I guess it allows them to send stuff up to the Satellite easier, but the show has never really bothered with explanations for things before so it's hard to see why they'd start now (How does he eat?  How does he breath?).  But the idea of Gypsy being a connection to the Mads is a neat idea, and it does set up a good Three Stooges pie gag!  Other host segments involve Tom Servo scatting like Mel Torme (to the dismay of Mike and Crow), Mike and the Bots envisioning the woman of the future, and Mike puts the Bots on the honor system (and regrets it).

Though in my opinion Girls Town is one of the better premieres of the series, as the riffing is wildly funny and the movie is watchably stupid.  And all the men and bi-curious ladies get a gander at Mamie Van Doren in her prime, so we're all winners here!  It's worth taking a trip to Girls Town!

Classic

The DVD

Girls Town was one of the last episodes to hit home media on Shout Factory's Volume XXXIX set, which as of this writing is the final collection of classic MST episodes.  Video is pretty solid, though the audio in the movie has a slight hiss in dialogue that that was typical of video tapes at the time.  I feel like it's safe to assume that it's not a flaw in the transfer of the episode but a flaw in the copy of the film they viewed.

Bonus features include Anatomy of a Theme, which is an interview with Chuck Love, who helped Joel Hodgson create the MST theme song.  He talks about the creation of both it and the ending "Love Theme," and how it's his most covered composition.  Also here is a trailer for Girls Town.

Make More MST3K Live Streams (MST3K Special)

Five-and-a-half years after the original Kickstarter campaign to Bring Back MST3K and one-and-a-half years after Joel announced Netflix wasn't picking up the series for a thirteenth season, Joel returned to Kickstarter in April of 2021 with a new idea of launching a new app called the Gizmoplex, to debut new episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000 on and hopefully self-sustain the series for the foreseeable future.  One of the more amusing things that Joel brought to this Kickstarter that had fans delighted was a series of live streams featuring himself, the revival cast, the tour cast, and a few special guests like J. Elvis Weinstein, Mary Jo Pehl, and Bill Corbett.

The majority of these live streams seemed to play with the seed of concept you could see brewing in the previous year's Riff-A-Long special, where the cast would watch a classic episode of the series together.  Instead of riffing over it like the Riff-A-Long did, these streams were meant to be more like watching MST together with your friends and hanging out.  They would commentate on the episode or the movie amongst each other as well, and the discourse is delightful.

There were six episodes watched during these watch party streams:  Hobgoblins, Untamed Youth, Quest of the Delta Knights, Gamera vs. Guiron, Werewolf, and Zombie Nightmare.  I have absolutely no problem with the episode selection.  I think all of these episodes are rock solid and fun.  Even Untamed Youth, while a first season episode, is one of the highlights of it's season.  And what's great about watching these episodes with the new casts intermingling and we get to see them talk about the series as both fans and people who worked on it.  It's cool to hear everyone throw out their favorite episodes and compare them to their own experiences on the show, such as Baron giving a shoutout to Yongary, claiming he and Jonah were certain that episode was going to be the hit of the season, only to be taken by surprise when Cry Wilderness got all the love (I like Yongary, but I'm going to give the edge to Cry Wilderness).

Probably the undoubted highlight is watching these episodes with Joel.  He even admits up top that he had never seen Hobgoblins or Quest of the Delta Knights before, which means we get to see him watch these episodes for the first time.  I'll tell you what, watching him get that huge belly laugh at a joke you're familiar with a million times over makes it feel like we're watching these episodes for the first time all over again.  One moment I treasure is when they watch the opening credits to Hobgoblins and Joel reads a name in the credits and says "I know him!"  That's the moment that made me fall in love with this format.

In a bit of a missed opportunity, while it's fun to see Joel respond to episodes he's not familiar with, I kind of wish there were more Joel episodes in this line-up.  There are only two, and it feels like there could be some behind the scenes trivia that could be deep dived into.  He and J. Elvis talk a lot over Untamed Youth, about how they had difficulty writing the episode and had to buy alcohol to get through it.  Joel was set to also view Gamera vs. Guiron but had to back out at the last minute (the official reason is that his co-workers asked him to take the day off), so that stream turns less informative and more rowdy, as Jonah, Hampton, Nate, and Conor turn the episode into a party.  But Bill Corbett drops in for the Werewolf stream to talk about the production of that episode, while Mary Jo barely remembers anything about Delta Knights.

On the flip side, Zombie Nightmare has a guest who actually worked on the film itself.  Frank Deitz pops in after the episode to discuss what sounds like a chaotic shoot, including Adam West stories, unfilmed nudity, and forgetting to pick up a guest actor at the airport.  Deitz is full of life and is eager to share these interesting tidbits, and it's fun to hear them!

There are also Q&A sessions.  A lot of basic stuff like "What's your favorite episode?" and so on.  I actually had a question that was answered on stream, though they didn't mention my Twitter account by name.  My question basically stemmed from how little we knew about Emily, Conor, Nate, and Yvonne, because they just kinda popped up in the franchise one day without much introduction and never left, so they've always felt like an enigma to me.  So I asked on Twitter how they met Joel and got into the fold, which apparently is a question that really excited Emily, because she "liked" my tweet within seconds and she brought it up right at the beginning of the Hobgoblins stream, and they all did a great roundtable about auditioning for their roles.  The fact that I helped spawn a Q&A highlight gives me the warm and fuzzies.

But the highlight stream wasn't even a watch party, but rather a Jackbox Game Night stream.  Jonah, Baron, Hampton, and Rebecca go head-to-head with Emily, Conor, Nate, and Yvonne to see which cast was the superior by playing several rounds of the Jackbox party games.  Let me tell you right now, any criticism that the new cast isn't "funny enough" went down in flames with this stream, because I was laughing so hard I couldn't breath.  Best in Show, in my opinion, goes to each team's Crow, which both walk up to the plate and hit a home run.  Nate gives us an outstanding Ed Wynn impersonation, which effectively annoys everyone in the room, but left me begging for more.  Meanwhile Hampton just steals the spotlight at every opportunity, culminating in a brilliant round of Talking Points, where he does an angry German talking about his life-changing Golden Girls fan fiction.  It is truly epic and hilarious.

However my one criticism is that when he says "Thank you" at the end, he doesn't add "For being a friend."

You see like the theme song.......okay, I'll shut up now.

Everything leads up to a second Final Countdown telethon, which culminated the Kickstarter by entertaining the audience to the best of its ability as the final hours counted down.  Unfortunately due to Covid protocols, the telethon isn't as extravagant as the 2015 telethon and had to be held over Zoom, but it still has a few surprises up it's sleeve.  There are pre-recorded bits by entertainment guests, including Dana Gould and Mario and his magic robots.  Celebrity guests include Alex Winter and Michael Sheen, who both give the Kickstarter their well wishes.  Jonah and Emily's crew even go in for Jackbox Round 2, which isn't as extravagant as the first stream and just consists of a few rounds of Quiplash.

Like the previous telethon, the main goal of the Kickstarter was already passed before the telethon began, and the telethon was just reaching for stretch goals.  In this case, Joel challenged us to surpass the $6.36 million that the previous Kickstarter raised, in return for a bonus holiday special episode.  Mission accomplished within the final hour, but the telethon continued as they continued to watch the counter go up until it surpassed $6.5 million and the Kickstarter officially ended, officially confirming MST3K would return for a thirteen-episode thirteenth season, and the Gizmoplex app will become a reality this fall.  I find myself optimistic for the future of the series.  But the real test of the fruits of these labors will be seeing whether or not the Gizmoplex can sustain enough funds for a fourteenth season.  Here's hoping we won't need another Kickstarter to get there, because I'm running out of money!

That being said, once the Gizmoplex gets up and running, it might be fun if the watchalongs become a regular thing.  There are certainly plenty of episodes, and I'm sure a lot of people will tune into them!  It would help sell the Gizmoplex and these streams help endear the audience to the new cast.  But even if these are all we get, these were some of the most fabulous moments of the second Kickstarter.

Make More MST3K Kickstarter Bumpers (MST3K Special)

Here we go again!  Our six million dollars last time apparently wasn't enough, so here they are again begging for more money.

Another Kickstarter came and went.  We actually made more money than last time but wound up with one less episode somehow.  Damn you inflation!  But this time instead of just investing in the episodes, we're also hopefully investing in thr future of Mystery Science Theater 3000 by funding the episodes and also a new app for them to debut on called the Gizmoplex.  What is Gizmoplex?  Well I'm glad you asked, because series creator Joel Hodgson is here to tell you!

Like last time, Joel put together a presentation for potential backers, pitching new episodes while Jonah and the Bots riffed him from theater seats down below.  Due to Covid restrictions, they present their ideas like a Zoom meeting this time, with each character featuring their own screen, interacting.  Joel pitches his idea for the Gizmoplex, an interactive app of MST content, while Jonah and the Bots listen and interject.  These bits are cute, though they're a bit stiffly scripted.  It might be that everyone's part was filmed separately then pasted together, making interaction feel like its lacking natural interplay.  Because of this, it feels like when it goes for humor they go for safe nostalgia laughs, like Crow referencing Earth vs. Soup or his desire to "decide who lives and who dies."  Everyone feels like they're sticking to a strict script, and maybe they need to, because they need to get this idea across as clearly as possible.

There are only two videos this time, with the first devoted to selling the idea of a Gizmoplex app, while the second has a lot to do with the production of the new season.  Joel pitches "remote production," which is an effort make the series through Covid restrictions, which Joel is pitching as making filming easier.  I'm going to trust Joel to figure that out, and we'll see if it works once season 13 debuts.

Probably the big news relevant to the series from this second video is something a lot of MSTies were expecting but never had confirmation of, that the cast of the Cheesy Movie Circus Tour was being worked into the show.  We didn't really know how or when, but Joel had really pushed to endear this cast to us for two years before actually saying they were going to be on the series, with them riffing shorts, hosting Turkey Days, and putting on the Riff-A-Long special.  This cast includes Emily Marsh as new test subject Emily Connor, Conor McGiffin as her Tom Servo, Nate Begle as her Crow, and Yvonne Ingrid Freeze as the new Gypsy model GPC (Joel decided to rename Gypsy upon learning the word "gypsy" is a derogatory slur) as well as the new Mad Mega Synthia.

Upon learning this crew will be adopted into the series, Joel then throws a pitch at us that the episodes will be alternating between the Jonah/Baron/Hampton/Rebecca crew and the Emily/Conor/Nate/Yvonne crew.  The idea coming across to me in this is that there are multiple experiments going on in Kinga Forrester's new "Gizmoplex" and each host has their own set of robots (I'm curious if Jonah's were ever meant to be the original Bots or were always just copies that Kinga created, and she created another group of duplicates for Emily).  It's an interesting concept and I'm eager to see it in action.

Joel also drops the bombshell on us that if they make the full $5.5 million they want for a full season, he would come back to host two episodes.  Well that's all well and good, but without Kevin/Josh and Trace as his Servo and Crow, is it really the Joel return we wanted?  Especially if we're playing with this multiple bot concept.  Plus if we're getting Joel back, that just has the fan in me begging for Mike to come back too.

But that's looking a gift horse in the mouth.  Of course I'd like to see Joel back, and those who aren't participating in the show have their reasons.  The new season sounds fun, though the plan is a bit convoluted.  Do these videos successfully sell the idea to me?  Honestly, I was in the bag no matter what so I'm not really sure.  If one didn't like the Netflix seasons, more MST is a hard sell, unless the person investing really likes Emily's crew a whole lot better than Jonah's.  I think the stilted comedy of the videos doesn't really sell the humor of the show.  I did however like the running gag where Crow becomes obsessed with the idea of eating Jonah and the closing of the second video where Crow pitches his World War Space script and everyone logs out except Emily's Crow, who is enraptured.

But whatever my opinion may be, people wanted more MST3K and the people spoke.  MST3K is officially coming back for a new season and we have these videos to partially thank for that.

1201-Mac and Me

Film Year:  1988

Genre:  Science Fiction, Fantasy, Comedy

Director:  Stewart Raffill

Starring:  Mac and him

MST Season:  12

The Movie

Witness the thrilling origin of that clip that Paul Rudd would always play every time he guested on Conan O'Brian.  Even when he was promoting Ant-Man.  ANT-MAN!  Imagine looking for footage of the latest Marvel movie and you get that shot of that kid in a wheelchair rolling downhill.

Mac and Me is a cheesy late-80's attempt to cash in off the popularity of Steven Spielberg's beloved family film E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial.  Like E.T., Mac and Me follows a group of kids in the suburbs who befriend a lost little alien who is trying to find his family.

Now imagine everything that E.T. did right was replaced by a bunch of creative choices that elicit the response of "Oh Jesus Christ, why did you do that?!"

Mac and Me was an instant crap classic when it came out, bringing about a slew of negative reviews and many critics calling it one of, if not THE, worst movies of the year.  The movie was even nominated for Worst Picture at the Razzie Awards, but lost to the craptacular Tom Cruise vehicle Cocktail (which incidentally was riffed by Rifftrax).  So Mac and Me has a bit of a reputation, yet I hadn't seen it until it aired on Mystery Science Theater 3000.

Yeah, it's pretty bad...I guess.

Mac and Me is more of a dumb movie than a painful one.  There are a ton of strange and bizarre hoops it jumps through to tell its derivative story.  I kind of admire that it jumps through as many as it does, with a sort of abstract, almost animated way of presenting the aliens, where they are living cartoon characters.  Mac and Me might even have been a better movie if they were animated characters, instead of people in really shitty suits.  Or maybe it would have just gone full-on Space Jam.  I don't know, but it's a kooky flick.

It's probably remembered most for its very aggressive product placement.  Most notably with McDonalds and Coca-Cola.  McDonalds is the setting for a fairly lengthy musical scene in the film (a good portion of it apparently is cut out of the MST version, mind you), while Coke is almost used as a prop.  The kids in the film almost always keep one handy, just in case the alien Mac is feeling down or hurt.  Then they bust out a Coca-Cola Classic and Mac is up and at 'em!

Drink Coke!  It'll cure what ails ya'!

It's a strange movie.  I didn't hate it, but I also didn't think much of it while watching it.  I think I see why it has such huge cult appeal, but I've seen too many movies like it or worse to think there is anything special about it.  I know it can't touch what I consider Mac and Me director Stewart Raffill's masterpiece, 1994's Tammy and the T-Rex, starring Paul Walker, Denise Richards, and a giant animatronic T-Rex puppet.  But maybe I was expecting too much for it to be genius on that level.

The Episode

Rejoice, MSTies!  Netflix has renewed Mystery Science Theater 3000 for another season...but on their own terms.  Our episode count in the previous season reflected a healthy Kickstarter campaign that overshot its goal and created bonus episodes to spare.  The problem is that Netflix is all about the "bingewatch experience," and you can't watch fourteen episodes of an hour and a half program in a single day (well, technically it's twenty-two hours long, so it's possible, but who's going to?).  Netflix will renew the show, but they want people to watch the entire season in a single day for...reasons, I guess.  So they just order six episodes and force a storyline to "encourage bingewatching."

I have...thoughts.

I do wonder if I should hold my tongue about this until my eventual season overview, but I think Netflix's "bingewatch experience" ruins the "television experience."  If an entire season of something was meant to be watched in a single day, it wouldn't be split into episodes.  Bingewatching can be a fun practice if I'm already familiar with a show and am doing it just for some me time, but when it's a brand new show, I don't see the merit.  Weekly episode viewing prompts discussion from the consumer and keeps a product in focus for a longer duration.  Pressuring viewers to watch an entire season in a single day can burn out interest and cause people to shift focus almost immediately.  This instant gratification demand that Netflix has created is why I try not to support the company if I can help it.  Netflix just...sucks.

That being said, new MST!  Yay!  I have to watch it all on release day or it will get cancelled, too.   Yay?  Oh shit, it's out on Thanksgiving and I have family commitments.  I have to watch it when I can and hope that's good enou.......oh.  Cancelled already, huh?  I guess I have nobody to blame but myself.

But here we are with the bingewatch season of MST.  The six-part marathon that wants us to watch all the episodes in a row.  How are they convincing us to binge though?  MST isn't exactly a binge show.  Episodes run too long, and it's hard to wrap arcs around watching a bad movie.  What scenario have they cooked up?  Why, it's a little thing called "The Gauntlet!"  Kinga is feeling particularly evil and decided that putting Jonah through one bad movie isn't enough.  Putting him through six in a row is better!  And hyping up the new season of MST we had cast and crew members daring us to run the Gauntlet with Jonah and the Bots!

First up, the E.T. knockoff with a McDonalds sponsorship, Mac and Me!

"It's just like that scene from Mac and Me where Mac came back to life!" - Crow T. Robot while watching Pod People

It's interesting to me that we've reached a point in MST3K where then-current pop culture references from previous episodes are now riffing fodder on it.  That particular quote above from Pod People was a comparison made by Crow making fun of a derivative scene, but he decided to say it's derivative of another derivative film (Mac and Me) when it should be derivative of the main source (E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial).  Though while Mac and Me does feature a resurrection, it's not Mac that gets brought back to life, so that kind of ruins THAT gag.

Mac and Me lends itself well to the riffing format.  While the film is comedic, it's so absurdly embellished that is helps fuel comedy at its expense as well.  The slapstick is over-the-top and the budget is so low that the film goes to absurd measures to try and pull it off.  All of this revs up Jonah and the Bots, who latch onto the film' wackiness and throw some wacky jabs at it to play up its stupidity.  They also get a kick out of the film's absurd product placement deals, which even sees characters using Coca-Cola to help heal the alien life forms.

"Dammit nurse, this is a Pepsi!  It doesn't have the unique healing properties of a Coke Classic!"

Outside of the theater, there is not much playing up this "Gauntlet" concept other than the intro and the outro, so the episode mostly stands on its own.  However, interestingly they do a format change.  They dump the little Moon 13 breaks from the previous season, which were pointless so who cares.  However the big news is that they drop a host segment from the structure of the show.  Before I grab my pitchfork, I think it's important to look at what this does for the way the episode presented.  The classic format of MST split the theater into four segments, which helped everything play out in half hour chunks in a two hour time slot.  With MST on streaming, the previous format is a bit needlessly archaic, and by splitting the theater segments into three instead of four, it creates a three-act structure.  This might actually be the superior framing for the streaming era of the show, in my opinion.  What I do know for certain is that the format of the previous season didn't work.

Though to be fully transparent, I have a gut feeling the reason the segment was dropped was because Netflix thought it would "binge better."  Maybe it was the right call for the wrong reason.

But while we lost a host segment, we still have a good amount here.  Jonah and the Bots communicate with Moon 13 through a series of whistles, like the aliens in the movie, while they parody the McDonalds product placement and dance number later in the movie.  The Invention Exchange features the Mads new drug, while Jonah and the Bots create a spam and Pez hybrid called Spez.

And as for the payoff to last year's cliffhanger where Jonah was devoured by Reptilicus Metalicus, Jonah tries to tell his tale but nobody cares.  I love it!

Interestingly the opening to this episode is one of the few (only?) times Cambot appears onscreen, as Servo and Crow reformat him for more mobile cinematography.  And a Cambot in motion does look pretty good, let me tell you.  In fact, I like the brighter and softer production design in general this season.

During promotion of this season, Jonah talked about how Joel initially wanted Mac and Me to be the big closer of the season to end the Gauntlet on a high note.  Jonah convinced him to make it the premiere instead insisting that Mac and Me was too infamous of a bad movie and "People would have watched it first anyway."  I see both sides of the argument, though it feels to me like the worst movies of the Gauntlet come out right out of the gate and Mac and Me would have been better used as a punchier finale, as opposed to Ator, The Fighting Eagle, which is relatively tame for a bad movie (or they could have used Atlantic Rim for the finale, which is arguably the worst movie of the season).  But regardless of where Mac and Me fell during the season, it's definitely one of the more enjoyable and hilarious episodes of the Gauntlet.  Maybe even the best.  The Gauntlet never really produced a great episode in my opinion, but Mac and Me does come pretty close.

Good

PRETTY NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICE!

The DVD and Blu-Ray

Shout Factory brought Mac and Me to Earth on the DVD and Blu-Ray box sets of Season 12:  The Gauntlet.  Audio and video were both pristine, and, while there were no special features on the disc, it shared a disc with the following episode, Atlantic Rim.  Those who contributed to a pledge drive fundraiser got a special collection with a bonus disc, deemed the Pledge Drive Edition.  My copy happens to be that particular set.

617-The Sword and the Dragon

Film Year:  1956

Genre:  Fantasy, Adventure

Director:  Aleksandr Ptushko

Starring:  Boris Andreyev, Shukur Burkhanov, Andrei Abrikosov, Natalya Medvediva, Yelena Myshkova

MST Season:  6

The Movie

Originally released in Russia under the title Ilya Muromets, the name of its protagonist, The Sword and the Dragon is a heavily edited version imported to the US by Roger Corman.  I'm sure that doesn't do wonders for its coherency, but the gist of the film does come through.  This particular film is a generational fantasy saga about Ilya Muromets, who inherits a legendary sword and a trusty steed, and quests to become a great warrior of his country and defend it from invading forces.

If these Russo-Finnish films seem similar, it's mostly because they're mostly made with largely the same crew.  The Sword and the Dragon is from the makers of The Day the Earth Froze and The Magic Voyage of Sinbad, and it certainly feels it.  I kind of like The Sword and the Dragon the best of these three movies, because I think the attempt at a warrior's life story is pretty interesting and, as always, these fantasy films bring some unique, playful, and cool, if somewhat wacky, visuals.

That being said, like all of these Russian epics, The Sword and the Dragon goes full speed ahead and leaves the viewers a bit in the wind.  It trusts the audience to keep up, which will probably be easier for those familiar with its folklore.  The Sword and the Dragon is just a whirlwind of fantasy adventure and swashbuckling action, and for some people, that's what the doctor ordered.

The Episode

As per normal with the Russo-Finnish films, the movie is doing all the heavy lifting.  The riffers are just there to enhance it.  And with the crazy, bombastic fantasy on display, The Sword and the Dragon is just as deliciously flavorful as the previous films.  Mike and the Bots latch onto the larger-than-life characters and wacky displays of spectacle and go to town with their embellishment of each, which makes the episode constantly fun and engaging.  These films never disappoint.

The host segments are a bit more uneven, but mostly okay.  I have a suspicion that the movie was running short for them, because a few segments run exceptionally long.  Oddly enough, those are the bits I really enjoyed.  I really like the "A Joke By Ingmar Bergman" sketch, which is a slow, long walk for its gag, but is mostly just a lengthy parody film fans will recognize and enjoy.  The other lengthy sketch is "SupercalifragilisticexpialiWACKY," which is a parody of a parody basically.  It's a riff on a zingy political satire performance like this that would get on stage and take rapid potshots at the government.  What I like about this segment is that it makes fun of how lame performances are, but it has a roundabout way of being funny because of how unfunny it is.

Other segments include a short re-enactment of the film and a visit from Ilya Muromets, who is now the owner of a pancake house for some reason.  On the Mads end, Dr. Forrester and Frank meet their new neighbors, who happen to be ladies (played by Bridget Jones and Mary Jo Pehl), but Dr. F and Frank don't know how to talk to girls.  This segment seems to be a giant dig on comic book nerds and sci-fi fans not being able to attract women, which can be a bit mean spirited.  However the segment does go an extra mile in stating that it's actually the introverted personalities of the Mads that is making the situation awkward, and not their hobbies in general.

While it seems like I have more to say about the host segments than the riffing, that's mostly because the pleasurable riffing experience is more or less just "It just works."  The flashy spectacle and fun ribbing is always a good combination, and it always has been. Fans of The Day the Earth Froze, The Magic Voyage of Sinbad, and even the eighth season's Jack Frost will want to seek out The Sword and the Dragon, because it is every bit as funny.

Classic

The DVD

Shout Factory brought us to the magic land of The Sword and the Dragon as a part of their Volume XXIV collection.  The video transfer occasionally had a slight flicker on the top of the screen, not too bothersome, while audio was solid.  The sole bonus features where a pair of shorts, Snow Thrills and A Date With Your Family.  Of the two, A Date With Your Family is the better one but it's an odd inclusion.  A Date With Your Family had already been released on DVD on Shorts Volume 1, and the episode it was featured with, Invasion USA, was released two volumes later.  There was really not much clamoring for the short to be a bonus feature.  Snow Thrills, on the other hand, was the short featured with It Conquered the World, which has never seen release and Snow Thrills was never on a shorts compilation, so it's inclusion is more welcome.