Sunday, August 7, 2022

"The Wonder of Reproduction" & A Tribute to The Pumaman (MST3K Special)


The Short

Learning all about the birds and the bees...from fish!

Let me tell you, with a title like this there were a number of ways this short could have gone and not all of them (0.01% of them) would have been family friendly.  I didn't expect it to be about a bunch of kids bugging some dude about seeing his new fish, but here we are.  How did these fish get here?  Well, it's the wonders of everyone's favorite social activity:  reproduction!

Just be glad we don't have to blow bubble nests or keep our eggs in our mouths, otherwise sex would be much more awkward than it already is.  I built a bubble nest once.  That date did not go smoothly.

This short is from a series of educational shorts called the "Wonder Series."  Whether every short is fish related or if this is just a one time deal, I couldn't tell you.  I'm not sure how many kids are interested in fish reproduction (unless they're a little too into The Little Mermaid), especially if what they know about human reproduction is up in the air.  All I know is I don't like fish.  Their giant eyes creep me out.  The less I know about how they have sex, the better.

Emily's crew takes on this short, and for the most part they keep it clean.  There are a lot of openings for some blue humor and it seems on the tip of their tongue, but this is a family show so restraint is probably for the best.  Still, if you're trying to please family audiences, then maybe a reproductive short isn't your best bet for material.  Emily's crew does well with the short regardless, though it's not a riot by any means.  It feels a bit safe to me, and while that's good for a few chuckles, openings for better jokes make me long to hear them.  But, you know, family show.  Maybe RiffTrax wouldn't have been afraid to take the shot.

Thumbs Up
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The Livestream

This livestream is less a celebration of an episode but rather a celebration of...upscaling, I guess.  Something that has been happening behind the scenes of the Gizmoplex is something that Joel Hodgson and Matt McGinnis refer to as "surgical enhancement."  Basically this means that they're working on a sort of digital remastering of the episode library of the original series.  Now, since the classic series was filmed and released in standard definition, there isn't a lot you can do, but they're working on making the best possible picture quality for these episodes anyway as our home media experience becomes more scrutinizing with video quality.  We have 4K home media discs now and TVs are up to 8K now (despite there being very little 8K content at the moment).  To expect classic Mystery Science Theater to meet those standards is unreasonable, but making the episodes look as sharp as possible is a prospect worth looking into.  Not to mention that new episode transfers could potentially drive traffic to the Gizmoplex for classic era MSTies who don't give a damn about new episodes.  It's something that could boost the MST library for a few decades in streaming.

So what is this, exactly?  Mostly it's an upscale.  Those of us who have seen classic MST on blu-ray releases has an idea of what it can look like (at least the better transfers), though they're also working on enriching the colors of the films and episodes.  Joel hosts an opening intro to this stream showing a side-by-side comparison, showing how faded Pumaman originally when the episode aired in the 90's while also showing off how colorful the enhancement is.


It looks fine.

Look, I'm of two minds of this.  I think altering the looks of the movies could potentially collide with the comedy of the episodes, since some jabs could mock the prints of the films themselves which would ruin the punchline.  Embarking on something like this is a thankless task that could potentially hurt the episodes.  But as stated above, video quality gets more important for media watchers by the year so there is a payoff, even if it could be a limited one.  So sure, work your library how you can.

But please, for fuck's sake, don't crop it.

What really grinds my gears about this stream isn't the remastering itself, it's that they cropped the episode.  They zoomed in to try and minimize the theater seats as much as possible, and it's not even enough to take away the full frame experience, so cutting off even that much is pointless.  However it should be noted nothing is cropped during the host segments (and I did ratio comparisons to confirm this) so all we're losing is a batch of black at the bottom during the theater segments.  But no matter what is cut off from the picture of the episode, altering an aspect ratio is something that doesn't sit well with me.  I even get pissed off watching Gamera vs. Guiron and seeing how the video on the film in that movie is stretched vertically.  I don't want it and if this is what "surgically enhanced" is bringing to the table, I'm not buying.  Luckily Joel does stress that the original versions of the episodes will still be available to viewers who don't want this.

So the last few paragraphs are just me wasting time getting to the point of me saying I don't care.  But there are probably people that do, so do it for them.


While the "enhancement" is the star of the show with this stream, let's not forget that Pumaman is a great episode (review here).  This stream doesn't have much to offer it except a few cute new host segments with Emily, Jonah, the Bots, Pearl, and Synthia.  Bonus host segments feature the Bots trying to get superpowers in a variety of Marvel and DC related means, Crow throwing around conspiracy theories, and just about everyone debating the pronunciation of "Pumaman."  And like the Gamera vs. Gurion stream, we conclude with a bonus feature from the Volume XXIX collection, which is an interview with Pumaman himself, Walter George Alton.

This stream is less a friendly episode rewatch and more a look at more of what the Gizmoplex can offer the series in the long run.  I don't have much use for it myself (at least not in the way featured here), but I do appreciate the effort and think it could be for the best.  I just ask that they don't fall into the darker traps of what projects like these can do, which they disappointingly already have.  I hope they can pull themselves out of it, though.

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