Multiplex Madness
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre: Comedy, Horror, Romance
Director: Zelda Williams
Starring: Kathryn Newton, Cole Sprouse, Liza Soberano, Henry Eikenberry, Joe Chrest, Carla Gugino
Screenwriter Diablo Cody flips off those who dismissed Jennifer's Body by returning to her dark comedy sensibilities, this time aided by Zelda Williams, daughter of beloved comedian Robin Williams, making her directorial debut. Together they weave a goth fantasy romance about a young girl who accidentally reanimated a body in a cemetery, and she slowly rebuilds him out of body parts harvested from those who irritate her. Lisa Frankenstein leans heavily into its 80's horror comedy influence, and it does so really, really well. Zelda Williams approaches the movie as a bleak fairy tale, like a young Edward Scissorhands era Tim Burton, only with heavy valley girl vibes. Kathryn Newton is channeling Beetlejuice/Heathers era Winona Ryder, and absolutely owning it. The movie does so much right that it would be forgiven if you turn a blind eye to what it doesn't do as smoothly. Cody is going for a very chaotic narrative, but she plays it so deep into that chaos that it almost feels like its own coherency is escaping her. It's a movie that starts out being so lovable and offbeat but confuses itself along the way. If the film stuck the landing, this probably would have been my favorite movie of the year. Instead, it's a solid one that I had a blast watching.
⭐️⭐️1/2
Genre: Horror
Director: Andrew Cumming
Starring: Sasha Oakley-Green, Chuku Modu, Kit Young, Iola Evans, Luna Mwezi, Awo Luening
Cavemen are afraid of the dark in this indie from the UK that was filmed during Covid lockdown. It sees a tribe who begin to fear something unknown in the darkness and venture to kill it before it kills them. The movie is refreshingly unique with its approach to horror, using the genre's fear of the unknown as an allegory for alienation via xenophobia. It's a noble effort that is impressively filmed for such a small-scale picture. I just can't escape the feeling that it's only halfway there. Most of the elements feel correct, but they also feel anemic. A beefier, fleshed out version of this movie would have probably driven something more compelling, because while the goals of the film are excellent, they also don't resonate. It winds up being a forgettable movie that should have been memorable.
⭐⭐⭐⭐
Oscars Nominated: Best International Feature Film
Genre: Drama
Director: Ílker Çatak
Starring: Leonie Benesch
Look, I know we already had a German-language film in the International Oscar category, but this one is actually German. Zone of Interest hailed from the UK, which is always at a disadvantage in the International category because a non-English language is a requirement, so they just happened to have a slam dunk with their drama about Nazi Germany. The Teacher's Lounge is Germany's actual submission into the race, which also had its share of hype. It's going to lose, mind you. Zone of Interest pretty much has the trophy in the bag, which is humiliating for The Teacher's Lounge, because it's losing to a German-language movie that isn't actually German (but Germany won the award last year, so it'll get over it). It deserves a glance, though. I swear, it's always worth a look down each year's Oscar list, because while some movies will be slogs (Killers of the Flower Moon) and some might be an Academy-favored niche that might not be an individual's cup of tea (The Holdovers), the hope is eventually you'll find one that hits. The Teacher's Lounge is one of those movies that makes it worth just seeing what's going on in the prestige side of cinema, even if you can't stand prestige cinema.
The Teacher's Lounge is about a German school that has been experiencing thefts. As the school tries to find out who the culprit is among the student body, one teacher begins to suspect the faculty, and accidentally starts a domino effect that threatens to fracture the entire school. To shoot it straight, this movie is intense, but not in a thriller kind of way. It's a film about personal paranoia, and how finger-pointing and victimization can make civilization crumble. It's a series of events that goes from "Oh...shit" to "Oh shit" to "OH SHIT" as the situation grows out of control over the course of its breezy runtime. The film even acts as a social satire in its way, mimicking the pressures of scrutiny from outside eyes, as one's actions that seemed simple in the moment become not-so-simple to explain. The movie might be frustrating in certain elements of ambiguity and unresolved conflicts, but the film is such a whirlwind that the teacher at the center of the conflict just wants it to stop. Some people are left worse for the wear, and we never fully understand why. The movie just expects us to move on and live with it. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've felt that I've had to do that in my life.
Art Attack
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre: Drama, Comedy
Director: Pawo Choyning Dorji
Starring: Tandin Wangchuk, Deki Lhamo, Pemo Zangmo Sherpa, Tandin Sonam, Harry Einhorn
A true vision of cinema: A movie about a monk...but he's got a gun!
In The Monk and the Gun, a young monk in Bhutan sets out on a search for a gun, a request by his lama. What he needs it for, he didn't say. The monk just knows he needs one. He finds one that happens to be an antique American Civil War rifle, but as he prepares to present it to his lama, an American gun collector attempts to buy it off him. This all plays out during Bhutan's switch to democracy in 2006, even though they seem to have some anachronistic confusion, because advertisements for the movie Quantum of Solace are prominently featured (and even a slight plot point), even though that film didn't come out until late 2008 (Casino Royale was the 2006 James Bond flick). The movie takes a few sharp jabs at democracy, though softly with a friendly smile. It's happy to point out the flaws and vitriol it causes, right down to a pretty on-the-nose scene where a mock election is held, and the people trying to teach democracy to the people tell them to be louder and angrier. The movie seems to not want to comment on whether democracy was a good thing for Bhutan or not, because it's portrayed as a strange idea that seems to be flowing through their contentment in this film. So, it just mocks it, instead. "Elections? Is that a new pig disease?" The movie doesn't formally announce what the theme of all these seemingly random elements are until the end, when we finally learn what the gun is for. It's a slow burn journey, but one that finds a satisfying resolution. It's not really a memorable movie, but a charming one.
Netflix & Chill
⭐
Streaming On: Shudder
Genre: Horror
Director: Asif Akbar
Starring: Terrence Howard, Valery M. Ortiz, Cuba Gooding Jr.
A family's child is dying of cancer, but also seems to be haunted by a spirit as her parents do whatever it takes to find a way for her to get better. Just going to get this out of the way: This movie sucks. It really sucks. Dear god, does this movie suck. I was initially hopeful, because it's not often you see a movie on Shudder that stars Terrence Howard and Cuba Gooding Jr. But then again, it wasn't every day you see a movie on Shudder that stars Eva Green, either, and that didn't save Nocebo last year. Nocebo was at least something, though. I can see why Green thought that was a movie worth making. Skeletons in the Closet doesn't even have that going for it. Maybe on paper it seemed like an interesting drama with horror undertones that might have been interesting if done well ("done well" being a generous way of saying "work of stylish brilliance"), but it is also a script that is very easily be boring if you don't know how to enhance it. And what makes this particular movie worse is just how unwilling it is to enhance itself. It leans so heavily into soap-operatics and presents itself like a TV horror movie from the early 2000s that is stuck in a limbo of between something that would be made for Showtime but sold to the Sci-Fi Channel. It devolves into chaos in the end, with flashbacks and an evil scarecrow. This movie is just an unpleasant mess.
God, I hated this movie. I spent ninety minutes waiting for it to do something, and in the end, it was just nothing. It might be the worst movie I've ever seen on Shudder.
Oscar's Trash Can
⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Oscars Nominated: Best Original Screenplay
Genre: Drama
Director: Todd Haynes
Starring: Natalie Portman, Julianne Moore, Charles Melton
Potential can of worms being opened by this film, which is inspired by the Mary Kay Letourneau statutory rape case. Natalie Portman plays an actress who spends a period of time studying for her latest role with Julianne Moore, who was tried and convicted after having an affair with a 13 year old boy and is now happily married to him decades later. The approach of the film is unique, because it could easily be a work of damnation and shock value, but it maintains a tone of neutral observer that a lot of films probably wished they could achieve. It doesn't contest that statutory rape is a bad thing, both legally and morally, but the film has its eye set squarely on the ever after, showcasing people who had committed these sins working to live an ordinary life among those who can, and occasionally cannot, accept them. It's the basic "challenges of reform" thematic premise of Psycho II, only done as a drama. At the same time, it also tells about how the lives around them were affected and how one's sin ripples to those around them. It's a movie that looks at the human being inside of someone who was publicized as a monster, showcasing that a person is more complex than their worst deed and the steady hand trying to maintain one's humanity under intense scrutiny. It also tries to delve into the psyche of those who commit such misdeeds, though it tends to shrug its shoulders and say "Dunno. People do stupid shit." It's bound to polarize, but that doesn't diminish its brilliance.
Oscar Nominees
20 Days in Mariupol (N/A)
The ABCs of Book Banning (N/A)
The After (N/A)
American Fiction ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️American Symphany (N/A)
Anatomy of a Fall ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
The Barber of Little Rock (N/A)
Barbie ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Bobi Wine: The People's President (N/A)
The Boy and the Heron ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
El Conde (N/A)
The Color Purple ⭐⭐⭐1/2
The Creator ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Elemental ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Eternal Memory ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Flamin' Hot ⭐️⭐️1/2
Four Daughters (N/A)
Godzilla Minus One ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Golda ⭐️⭐️
The Holdovers ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Io Capitano (N/A)
Invincible (N/A)
Island in Between (N/A)
Killers of the Flower Moon ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Knight of Fortune (N/A)
The Last Repair Shop (N/A)
Letter to a Pig (N/A)
Maestro ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
May December ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Năi Nai & Wài Pó (N/A)
Napoleon ⭐️⭐️1/2
Nimona ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Ninty-Five Senses (N/A)
Nyad (N/A)
Oppenheimer ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Our Uniform (N/A)
Past Lives ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Pachyderme (N/A)
Perfect Days (N/A)
Poor Things ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Red, White, and Blue (N/A)
Robot Dreams (N/A)
Rustin ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Society of the Snow ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Teachers' Lounge ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
To Kill a Tiger (N/A)
War is Over! Inspired by the Music of John and Yoko (N/A)
The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar (N/A)
The Zone of Interest ⭐⭐⭐1/2
Movies Still Playing At My Theater
American Fiction ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Anyone But You ⭐️1/2
Argylle ⭐️⭐️1/2
The Beekeeper ⭐⭐1/2
The Boy and the Heron ⭐⭐⭐1/2
Dune ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Migration⭐️⭐️1/2
Poor Things ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Wonka ⭐⭐⭐
New To Digital
American Fiction ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Book of Clarence ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Cult Killer ⭐️1/2
I.S.S. ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Coming Soon!
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