Monday, July 29, 2024

Cinema Playground Journal 2024: Week 30 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness


Deadpool & Wolverine
⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Genre:  Comedy, Superhero, Action, Adventure, Science Fiction
Director:  Shawn Levy
Starring:  Ryan Reynolds, Hugh Jackman, Emma Corrin, Matthew Macfadyen


Marvel Studios' latest offering is more Cinematic Universe adjacent than lynchpin, which might be for the best considering how many hard knocks the brand took last year.  Though you'd probably be better off if you've at least seen the Disney+ series Loki.  Or have seen all of the Marvel films 20th Century Fox made.  Look, MCU lore is heavy and complicated now, okay?  Deadpool & Wolverine appears to have been made primarily as a rose-colored glasses love letter to Marvel's spotty history with film with other studios outside of their own MCU franchise.  Paired with the equally entertaining Spider-Man:  No Way Home, it's certainly an energizing nostalgia trip for those of us who kept up with the superhero movies of the 2000's.

The movie sees Deadpool (from the Fox movie series) taken by the Time Variance Authority (from the Loki TV series), who pluck him from his timeline and tell him that now that Wolverine is dead (from Logan), the X-universe timeline is now breaking apart.  Forgiving the idea that the Deadpool movies and Logan running concurrent to each other is clearly insane, Deadpool is given the opportunity to join the MCU universe while his world dies.  Why did they make this offer?  I'm not sure.  And the movie never clarifies.  It's just an excuse to get Deadpool out into the multiverse to search for a new Wolverine to take back to his universe and stop the timeline from dissolving.  Unfortunately, he finds one that is a horrible drunk and the TVA were just going to accelerate the pruning of the world anyway...for reasons.  I'm not sure.  None of this movie makes any sense.

Despite it never really coming together as a story, Deadpool is a character that thrives on chaos, so this film's chaotic, nonsensical narrative is something that doesn't hurt him.  If you boil down a lot of elements of this film down, this movie is just Thor:  Ragnarok again:  a plotless road trip movie where worlds are dying but the people who are to save it are punted somewhere else and they have to find a way to get back by digressing through noise.  I didn't find this type of story suited Thor that well (at least, not the haphazard way that Ragnarok told it), so I've never been that much of a Ragnarok fan.  Deadpool is a character that you can just throw a bunch of noise at and he'll glide right through it.  Wolverine is a different, more brooding character, but he's so based in blunt-force trauma that he can take the punches of this film's franticness.  Deadpool & Wolverine lacks the fresh irreverence of the first Deadpool or the heart of the second, but it's delivers hefty laughs in its flashy nonsense to make it a must-watch for genre fans.  And of course, as we've come to expect from these Marvel multiverse films, there are fun cameos to make our nerdy hearts melt, including ones from movies you won't expect and even movies that don't exist (you really need to be aware of a deep cut development hell to understand one of them, like Nicolas Cage Superman in The Flash).  Deadpool & Wolverine is a fun ride, even if you won't understand it the next day.


The Fabulous Four
⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Comedy
Director:  Jocelyn Moorhouse
Starring:  Susan Sarandon, Bette Midler, Megan Mullally, Sharyl Lee Ralph, Bruce Greenwood, Timothy V. Murphy, Michael Bolton


The hard counterprogramming pivot from the Marvel entertainment this weekend somehow feels titled like it was trying to get Marvel overflow by giving itself a title suspiciously similar to "Fantastic Four," though that mistake might lead to intense disappointment.  Instead, The Fabulous Four is a movie that targets the older women demographic who adore it's main cast from back in its heyday, watching Big Business, Thelma & Louise, and reruns of Will & Grace every time they hit cable, and really enjoys Abbott Elementary.  This movie sees Bette Midler getting married, with old friends Megan Mullally and Sharyl Lee Ralph tapped to be her bridesmaids, who then trick Susan Sarandon into tagging along, who fell out with Midler years prior.  To be frank, the movie has little to recommend about it outside of it's cast.  It's purely a play for people who enjoy these four talents and just want to see them again.  The movie is more silly and pleasant than outright funny, which only makes it charm opportune for what little expectation one might have for it.  They get into trouble, bond, have fun, find love, and look good doing it.  Those who just want that will get it.  Those hoping for ambition wandered into the wrong theater.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater
Despicable Me 4 ⭐️⭐️1/2
Fly Me to the Moon ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Inside Out 2 ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Longlegs ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Oddity ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Twisters ⭐️⭐️

New To Digital
Bad Boys:  Ride or Die ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Dead Don't Hurt ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Tuesday ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Physical
Arcadian ⭐️1/2
Back to Black ⭐️⭐️1/2
Ezra ⭐️⭐️1/2
The Fall Guy ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Coming Soon!

Monday, July 22, 2024

Cinema Playground Journal 2024: Week 29 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness


Oddity
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Horror, Mystery
Director:  Damian Mc Carthy
Starring:  Gwilym Lee, Carolyn Bracken, Tadhg Murphy, Caroline Menton, Jonathan French, Steve Wall


A somewhat deceptively complex premise is setup as a woman hears a knock on her door from a strange panicked man telling her a man is in her house and she needs to open the door and let him in.  She is later found dead and the man at the door is blamed, and in the aftermath, her blind, psychic twin sister acts to put the puzzle pieces together on what happened that night.  Also:  creepy wooden man.  What's up with that?  I will say straight off the bat that it's worth sticking with this movie, because it can come dangerously close to plodding at times and it's entirely possible to get impatient with it, especially as we dive deeper into characters who constantly seem resentful of each other.  Oddity is a bit meandering and tonally off-center, almost in a mischievous way.  It's probably because it knows what it has up its sleeve.  And I'm actually not talking about the plot, which is trite and well-worn (hint:  MSTies will recognize certain twists from a little movie called The Screaming Skull).  It's not hard to guess where the movie is going, but the movie certainly knows how to construct suspense.  Oddity is rich in mood and atmosphere, with a supernatural element that probably plays with the best haunted house spookums I've seen since the original wave of Ju-On films twenty years ago.  I wish this movie maintained its inspired suspense throughout, because Oddity has the potential to be a movie for the ages when it wants to be.  It drops the ball on characterization, jumping back and forth between macabre style and somber melodramatics, which tempers my enthusiasm.  But when the movie is going hard for the horror, it is absolutely on fire.


Twisters
⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Disaster, Adventure
Director:  Lee Isaac Chung
Starring:  Daisy Edgar-Jones, Glen Powell, Anthony Ramos, Brandon Perea, Maura Tierney, Sasha Lane


C'mon baby, let's do the twist!  Belated sequel to the popular 90's disaster movie that was a collaboration between Speed director Jan de Bont and Jurassic Park novelist Michael Crichton, Twisters sees more people chasing tornadoes for fun.  And science stuff, I guess.  But mostly fun.  But it stops being fun and games when Daisy Edgar-Jones's team dies in an accident, leaving her traumatized.  She begrudgingly comes out of retirement years later in collecting tornado data for a real estate company, while Glen Powell jumps in with his YouTube crew and cowboy attitude and rattles the cage.  Twisters is very much a case of being exactly what it should be and also not enough.  It adheres pretty strictly to the tropes of 90's disaster blockbusters, to the point where it could probably be considered comfort food for late Gen X and early Millenials.  If you've seen Twister, Twisters is just another one, for better or worse.  I definitely fall in that range, but Twisters doesn't bring enough to the table for me to feel like I can justify a second blockbuster of tornado chasing.  I'm not sure there are that many stories you can make out of this concept.  In trying create another one, they created something that feels hashed together from an abandoned script to a direct to video sequel from twenty years ago, suffering from undercooked elements that rely on coincidence, introducing sudden "Twister fodder" characters, and plot contrivance.  I was vibing with the film early on, but as it continued it just grew tired and repetitious, and I just got bored as it threw what felt like the same tornado scene at me over and over again.  I'd probably describe it as being less exciting than it thinks it is, but suitably matinee entertaining for those looking for a popcorn-muncher.  Lower expectations probably yields a greater experience, so be warned on that.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater
The Bikeriders ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Despicable Me 4 ⭐️⭐️1/2
The Fall Guy ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Fly Me to the Moon ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Inside Out 2 ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Lion King ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Longlegs ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
MaXXXine ⭐️⭐️1/2

New To Digital
The Boy and the Heron ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Thelma ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Physical
Perfect Days ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Coming Soon!

Monday, July 15, 2024

Cinema Playground Journal 2024: Week 28 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness


Dandelion
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Drama
Director:  Nicole Riegel
Starring:  KiKi Lane, Thomas Doherty, Melanie Nicholls-King, Brady Stablein, Jack Stablein, Grace Kaiser


The titular Dandelion is the name of a musician who has never quite launched her career, despite her best efforts.  Soon she meets a guitarist who helps inspire her best work, and as their relationship grows romantic, it starts to take a rocky downturn.  The film is a relation of struggling artist's internal conflicts, told as a romance that begins passionate and grows strained.  There is a lot of effort in making the relationship at the core feel raw and real, right down to the complications that rupture it.  That little taste of reality is what Dandelion does best, though on the rare occasion that it tries to reach for something bolder, it starts to weigh itself down with melodramatics.  It's stronger as a character piece that's relating it's messages through implication rather than saying them out loud.  The movie has no resonating power to it, despite some heavy, at times miscalculated, efforts.  However, it's one that's easily digestible and enjoyed.


Longlegs
⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Genre:  Thriller, Horror
Director:  Osgood Perkins
Starring:  Maika Monroe, Nicolas Cage, Blair Underwood, Alicia Witt, Michelle Choi-Lee, Dakota Daulby


Silence of the Lambs meets The Shining meets Hereditary, with Nicolas Cage popping in playing what comes across as a homeless pedophile take on Willy Wonka.  I don't know what you're picturing after reading that sentence, but it's probably not as off-putting as Longlegs is.  The movie is a startlingly uncomfortable watch.  In fact, it even ends with the end credits running upside down, to assure that the audience is nice and discombobulated as they exit the theater.  The movie is one of those suspense thrillers that is off-kilter and obtuse, which can backfire if they run too hard in an extreme direction (see:  Skinamarink), but Longlegs does it in a fascinating way.

The story relates an FBI agent who is on the hunt for a serial killer known only as "Longlegs," as the connections and oddities start to add up to something personal.  This movie draws suspense from the discomfort the larger world gives a traumatized introverted mindset.  The main character spends most of her scenes with other people looking like she wishes she was alone, and when she's alone, it always feels like she's never alone.  Continuing from there, it's only dead set on keeping it disquiet vibe, which is helped by one of Nicolas Cage's most unhinged performances in a long line of unhinged performances.  Cage is very interesting here, because he's almost too much for the movie to contain.  There are points where he's exactly what the movie needs and others where he's just aimlessly insane and the movie isn't quite sure what to do with him.  Director Osgood Perkins keeps the cinematography almost broken when he's onscreen, which is when Cage is at his best, because the movie is working with him to create something transcendent.  When the movie has no choice to shoot him flat, the cracks in the performance begin to show and it almost kills the movie.  But the fact that the performance is this dangerous keeps the movie intriguing, maintaining that it's one of the year's highlights.


Robot Dreams
⭐️⭐️1/2
Oscars Nominated:  Best Animated Feature Film
Genre:  Drama
Director:  Pablo Berger
Starring:  A dog and a robot


Well, I'll be damned.  This movie actually does exist.  I was starting to think the Academy made it up, because I couldn't find a goddamn thing when by the time the awards went out.  This movie that totally isn't a fever dream is about a lonely dog who orders a robot companion.  After some fun days together, the robot rusts on the beach and is unable to move.  Since he's too heavy to carry, the dog is forced to abandon his friend on the beach until he can fix him.  Unfortunately, the beach seasonally closes immediately after, and the robot is forced to stay there until the following summer.  The titular "robot dreams" are a series of sequences where the robot fantasizes about what it will be like to return to his friend.

I'm disappointed in myself that I didn't like this movie more.  I love a good animated movie.  I love a good pantomime movie.  This should be my favorite movie of all time.  Instead, I just found myself getting tired of it at points, which is shameful, because the technical merits of the movie are very good, but it just wasn't emotionally paying off for me the way the hype promised it would.  I feel like I understood the movie's point early on and the movie was just doing a little dance for me for another hour after that.  Robot Dreams is more subtle and artistic than a movie like fellow Oscar contender Elemental, but Elemental doesn't exhaust its flame as swiftly as a movie like Robot Dreams, which runs out of batteries and tries to switch them around to make it run again (I am punning up a storm here).  It just compounds until what seems to be a calculated bittersweet conclusion that is supposed to be a tearjerker of accepting our lives as they change and move forward but it only really works if you hold the firm belief that you can only have one friend in your life at a time, which is a really fucking weird personal outlook if you think about it.  It probably works better if you look at the movie as a romantic partner metaphor, but that opens a whole can of worms about this movie being about a dog and his mail-order bride and I'd rather not get into that.

Positive aspects include its expressive simplicity.  It's very silent film influenced, expressing itself through visual cue rather than voice.  One can probably picture how the film might have played out starring Harold Lloyd if he had thought of it.  And the animation is pleasant and vibrant.  There's a point where the film becomes lush animation for the sake of lush animation.  It's certainly lovely to look at, and animation fans will find it heavenly.  The movie's themes of companionship and longing are strong, even if they don't evolve as much as the film seems to think they do.  Despite my lackluster reception to the film, it's certainly a film I'd recommend people to check out.  The right viewer will probably adore it far more than I did.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater
The Bikeriders ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Despicable Me 4 ⭐️⭐️1/2
The Fall Guy ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Fly Me to the Moon ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Garfield Movie ⭐️⭐️1/2
Inside Out 2 ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Lion King ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
MaXXXine ⭐️⭐️1/2
Thelma ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Digital
The Bikeriders ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Garfield Movie ⭐️⭐️1/2

New To Physical
Abigail ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
The Boy and the Heron ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Boy Kills World ⭐️⭐️1/2
Civil War ⭐️⭐️1/2
Tarot ⭐️⭐️
Unsung Hero ⭐️1/2

Coming Soon!

Monday, July 8, 2024

Cinema Playground Journal 2024: Week 27 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness


Despicable Me 4
⭐️⭐️1/2
Genre:  Comedy, Adventure
Director:  Chris Renaud
Starring:  Steve Carrell, Kristen Wigg, Pierre Coffin, Will Farrell, Sofía Vergara, Stephen Colbert, Joey King, Chloe Fineman, Steve Coogan, Miranda Cosgrove, Dana Gaier, Madison Polan, Chris Renaud


It's time for Minion merch to conquer the world while critics and film snobs pull their hair out.  Welcome back, Despicable Me!  This fourth installment sees reformed villain Gru and his ever growing family go into witness protection after a supervillain Gru has put behind bars breaks out and vows revenge.  The villain's name is Maxime, which I initially misheard as "Maxine," and, after the screenings I've had this week, I was really hoping it would be Mia Goth walking up to Gru and saying "Maxine FUCKING Minx," but it's just Will Farrell with a bad French accent.  A Despicable Me movie can ride or die based on how entertaining its villain is, so that's kind of a wash.  The witness protection premise is cute, which brings about suitably awkward scenarios for these characters to get into.  Gru sells solar panels in this one.  Rod from Birdemic would be proud.  Little Agnes has trouble working with her new alternate name, because she sees it as a lie and lying is bad.  That's adorable.  Stephen Colbert plays a snobby neighbor with a aspiring villain for a daughter, and that's quirky.  These are all neat ideas, though they never add up to a complete story.  The movie is not much on plot, opting instead for segmented silliness.  A lot of what's going on feels like chaotic short films that branch out from the idea of the family in witness protection.  Even the Minions subplot of gaining superpowers feels oddly irrelevant, but provides adequate slapstick entertainment.  That slapstick entertainment was enough to keep the kids in my theater giggling throughout, which tells me that even if the Despicable Me franchise might be struggling with a direction, its target audience is still in the bag.


Fly Me to the Moon
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Comedy
Director:  Greg Berlanti
Starring:  Scarlett Johansson, Channing Tatum, Woody Harrelson, Ray Romano, Jim Rash, Anna Garcia, Donald Elise Watkins, Noah Robbins, Colin Woodell, Christian Zuber, Nick Dillenberg


We've got a pre-release review in the tank!  Early screenings of Fly Me to the Moon were at my cinema, and I was game to check it out.  This movie tells a fictionalized take of the Apollo 11 mission in 1969, where NASA hires PR expert Scarlett Johansson to help make the idea of landing on the moon exciting for a disillusioned American public and distract them from the Vietnam War, while also getting under the skin (read: getting flirtatious with) NASA Director Channing Tatum.  The situation grows rocky when government agent Woody Harrelson requests that Johansson help create a fake moon landing as a contingency, in case the mission goes south.  The movie is directed with spring in its step by Greg Berlanti, who most might know from Love, Simon and many, many shows on the CW, including Arrow, The Flash, Supergirl, and Riverdale.  Berlanti keeps the playful 60's vibes jamming with a groovy jukebox soundtrack and a swaggy presentation of its cast.  The movie's flamboyance is a sugar-coated flavor of delicious, largely thanks to Johansson's overwhelming charisma.  I have less to say about Tatum, because his role is more disposable, only acting as a straight man to Johansson and also a required love interest.  But Johansson's excellent spotlight-hogging ensures that all eyes are on her at all times.  It's a quirky movie that keeps itself constantly on the move.  Sometimes it feels like it's juggling too much, but its busy hustle helps endear it.  


MaXXXine
⭐️⭐️1/2
Genre:  Thriller
Director:  Ti West
Starring:  Mia Goth, Elizabeth Debicki, Kevin Bacon, Giancarlo Esposito, Moses Sumney, Michelle Monagham, Bobby Cannivale, Halsey, Lily Collins


MaXXXine is the third installment of a trilogy of spirited genre homages by director Ti West which started in 2022 with X, a grindhouse callback slasher movie that invaded the world of independent pornography, and continued several months later with prequel Pearl, which infused psychological horror into bright-eyed Judy Garland-style classical showmanship.  MaXXXine sees series star Mia Goth return as the heroine of X, Maxine Minx, who graduates from porn star to full actress, finally ready to make a name for herself in Hollywood by making her debut in a horror movie.  Soon after landing the role, Maxine begins receiving messages that link her to the massacre from the previous film, which may also be linked to real life serial killer the Night Stalker.

West has more of his genre cross polination secret sauce in store for his audience, this time working with vintage sex noir and combining it with a Michael Mann influenced homicide thriller, like watching a crossbreed between Angel and Manhunter.  Those who like their movies to coast on vibes will find more than enough in MaXXXine to feast upon.  Like previous entries, the movie does also feel like it has more at stake in nailing it vibe than its full experience.  In MaXXXine's case, the movie is content on having Mia Goth strut around to a techno beat and lay a pretty straightforward mystery in front of her before tossing a chaotic conclusion at the audience.  It's a movie that chills for two acts before having a cocaine fueled meltdown for its climax.  Its violence isn't as exciting as X and Goth isn't given any career-defining highlights like in Pearl, but its tonal endearment makes it enticing.

This is the first movie of the series that doesn't end with a teaser/title reveal for a follow-up that is already in development.  However, horror fans probably shouldn't fret about it, as West has already gone on record saying that a fourth film is in the cards.  I would be game for it.  While imperfect, the X trilogy has been a fairly unique experience in the genre, and if West can continue being this playful with it, another would be more than welcome.

Netflix & Chill


Beverly Hills Cop:  Axel F
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Streaming On:  Netflix
Genre:  Comedy, Action
Director:  Mark Molloy
Starring:  Eddie Murphy, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Taylour Paige, Kevin Bacon, Judge Reinhold, John Ashton, Paul Reiser, Bronson Pinchot


The original Beverly Hills Cop is probably the greatest cop comedy of all time.  I've only seen the sequels once each and don't recall being particular endeared by either of them.  The second one seemed more stylized than funny (directed by Tony Scott hot off of Top Gun), while the third one didn't seem all too concerned about being anything.  Five minutes into Beverly Hills Cop:  Axel F, I found myself laughing and enjoying the action.  Because of that, it was already the best sequel in the bunch.

Thirty years after the last entry in the series, Detroit cop Axel Foley once again returns to Beverly Hills after his attorney daughter gets involved in a criminal conspiracy that threatens her life.  Everything that follows is hardly a surprise, as we get corrupt cops, romantic tension between Axel's partner and his daughter, and a string of nostalgia cameos and needle drops.  I wouldn't expect anybody is watching Beverly Hills Cop 4 for originality, though.  After the tough break this franchise has had, simple competence will do.  Axel F is competent in the same way the later Bad Boys movies are competent, in that it wears its formula with pride and shoots only to be a solid representation of it.  Action and laughs are had, and I certainly enjoyed my time with it.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater
Bad Boys:  Ride or Die ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Bikeriders ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Fall Guy ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Garfield Movie ⭐️⭐️1/2
Inside Out 2 ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Kinds of Kindness ⭐️⭐️1/2
Thelma ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Digital
Babes ⭐️⭐️1/2
IF ⭐️1/2

New To Physical
Housekeeping for Beginners ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Coming Soon!

Monday, July 1, 2024

Cinema Playground Journal 2024: Week 26 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness


Daddio
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Drama
Director:  Christy Hall
Starring:  Dakota Johnson, Sean Penn


Dakota Johnson gets into Sean Penn's taxi for a long drive home, and the two use that time to discuss daddy issues and toxic relationships.  It's a very straightforward duet drama, often coming off as written for the stage with hefty dialogue that always sounds delicately written. The movie is mostly a stream of consciousness load psychoanalysis babble.  It can be a strength because Johnson and Penn commit, but it can also grow stale in that it can drive in circles with its tendency to overanalyze the obvious.  Johnson keeps pace with making flirty eyes at the camera, and when she's not, she's making contemplative scowls at her phone, while Penn maintains gruff vulgarity.  And I hope you like the word "panties," because this movie certainly loves it and is willing to call attention to it.



Horizon:  An American Saga - Chapter I
⭐️1/2
Genre:  Western
Director:  Kevin Costner
Starring:  Kevin Costner, Sienna Miller, Giovanni Ribisi, Jena Malone, Sam Worthington, Michael Rooker, Danny Huston, Abbey Lee


That feeling you get when you hear a Horizon movie franchise is coming out and you can't wait to see a redhead mow down robot dinosaurs with her bow and arrow and instead you get a Kevin Costner vanity project.

Costner apparently had the idea for this movie in the back of his head for a while.  How thorough the idea has been is unclear to me, though it feels like he just looked at fantasy epics that filmed multi-movie sagas like Lord of the Rings and the juggling of various stories that inch their way forward in Game of Thrones and said "Imma do that but western."  The western genre probably could produce a big sweeping, long, branching narrative epic, though it needs to come out the gate strong if it wants to do this.  Horizon:  An American Saga does not.

The series mostly centers on a western settlement in the 1860's called Horizon, and Chapter I sets into motion a few dozen narratives stemming around it.  They have little to do with each other, and few of them gather any steam to feel like they're going anywhere in this first installment.  This is problematic, because if your bait and hook for a four-part narrative is "Look at all these characters, we'll tell a story with them later" then you've lost the plot on grabbing your audience.  Granted, Costner tries to wake up the audience early on by having the settlement come under seige by territorial Native Americans, which leads to a lengthy battle sequence that is just thrown at the viewer with little context.  We don't know what the point is of any of this carnage is for about an hour, it's just a bunch of people being savaged in a lengthy setpiece, while Costner tries to convey the strong-willed victimhood of white men.  We have to root for them because we have no idea what's going on and they're the ones wearing cowboy hats.  After that, the movie mellows out, and just introduces characters for a straight two hours, few of which show any promise in being compelling protagonists promising character growth.  The movie gets a bit of color in its most endearing character, a patron-hunting prostitute who actually injects some levity into the self-seriousness of her surroundings.  The most entertaining scene in the movie is her hovering around Kevin Costner's character and giving him a five-minute sales pitch for her vagina.  She's legitimately amusing and the movie doesn't use her enough, instead launching what I'm assuming is the main storyline (because it's the storyline with Costner as the lead), where she and Costner go on the run with a baby that a group of outlaws want.  She is kind of just dragged around after that.  Outside of Costner and his colorful hooker, the movie is loaded with character actors, a lot of which I enjoy.  They don't do anything of substance, but I liked seeing friendly faces that I knew.  I got to hear Michael Rooker try and do an Irish accent.  I've never heard him do that before.  It's really weird.

But what it boils down to is that Horizon is three hours long and barely any movie actually happens.  I think Costner is so hellbent on wanting people to think of Horizon as being a twelve-hour movie that he's not paying attention to whether or not the individual films play as individual experiences.  That was something Lord of the Rings was smart enough to do.  Dune, as well.  Hell, Rebel Moon and that awful Strangers movie from last month could do it.  What's Horizon's excuse?  I can't recommend Horizon because Chapter I is just an extended prologue that conveys very little and one could probably watch the next movie just fine without having seen it.  It's the cinematic equivalent of "This could have been an email."


Janet Planet
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Drama
Director:  Annie Baker
Starring:  Julianne Nicholson, Zoe Ziegler, Elias Koteas, Will Patton, Sophie Okonedo


The film debut of playwright Annie Baker, Janet Planet follows a mother and daughter spending the summer together at home, as the audience observes several relationships and houseguests that come into their lives.  It's hard to adequately relate a story because the movie almost keeps it to itself.  Janet Planet is subdued to a point where it almost seems to be internalizing its story into subtext instead, while saying what probably should be subtext out loud.  It has very niche appeal because of that, though it commits to its creative choices with full determination.  The movie can almost be frustrating in its journey, because its progression can feel obtuse as the characters just sit and contemplate what their lives are, sometimes saying it out loud and sometimes internalizing it.  Baker does a good job at conveying certain elements with as few words as possible, and when it ends, we do feel like we've reached a destination.  Whether or not it's a viewer's particular cup of tea is a trickier question.


Kinds of Kindness
⭐️⭐️1/2
Genre:  Anthology, Comedy
Director:  Yorgos Lanthimos
Starring:  Emma Stone, Jesse Plemons, Willem Dafoe, Margaret Qualley, Hong Chau, Joe Alwyn, Hunter Schafer


Thusfar, every time Yorgos Lanthimos pairs up with Emma Stone his movie becomes an Oscar darling.  Why stop now?  When you find your lucky charm, it's hard to let go.  Their third project together is Lanthimos's stab at a bizarre anthology, telling three eccentric tales that are all performed by the same group of actors, headlined by Stone and Jesse Plemons.  Kinds of Kindness is so abstract that conveying what it is about is difficult, to the point where the trailer is nothing but a montage list of actors and letting everyone know what director it is.  That's just as well, because chances are that if you know who Lanthimos is then you know what to expect, and you probably already know whether the movie is worth watching or not.  Very little of my opinion on this movie matters because of that.  What I will say is that Lanthimos is most certainly a master at amusing himself, and I respect that.  Kinds of Kindness presents three tales that I'm sure amuse Lanthimos quite thoroughly, though he's so invested in them that he can't tell when he's meandering or failing to convey a point.  Those who want three straight hours of weird and silly will get just that.  There's not much else to it, though.


A Quiet Place:  Day One
⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Thriller, Horror
Director:  Michael Sarnoski
Starring:  Lupita Nyong'o, Joseph Quinn, Alex Wolff, Djimon Hounsou


Let's make some noise...while you still can.  This prequel to the thriller favorite A Quiet Place chronicles the early days of the hearing-sensitive creatures (despite the title of "Day One," it actually takes place over the course of a few days), as they descend on New York and just wreck house.  If you're hoping for explanations of the creatures or a thorough examination of how they took over the world, you'll leave disappointed, because the real story of the film is Lupita Nyong'o traveling through the apocalypse to get pizza.  If you think I'm joking or exaggerating, I assure you that this is the genuine story of the film.  One might hope it might push itself for something more interesting, but the film is frustratingly unambitious, squandering any story and thematic potential a prequel could bring, rushing though these elements to just make "another one."  Normality is kept to the first ten minutes.  Learning curve of "Quiet Place rules" is skipped over while Nyong'o is unconscious for a spell, waking up in a franchise status quo where everyone already knows to shut the fuck up.  There are more than a few possibilities for a Quiet Place prequel, and Day One chases none of them.  Which begs the question of why is this the "how it all began" story if you're not going to tell that story?

I'm inclined to believe the primary purpose of the film was to shoot for 9/11 allegory, which is fair enough.  Director Michael Sarnoski feels more invested in the movie when he's pushing crisis imagery on his audience.  When it comes to getting personal, he shows disinterest.  Nyong'o's story of just wanting a good slice of pie at the end of the world isn't engaging, even if Nyong'o is good in the role.  It just serves as an excuse to get her to wander in the opposite direction of everyone else and stumble into noisy situations.  She also does this while carrying an emotional support cat the entire time, which is a bizarre creative choice that never pays off.  In fact, the cat's inclusion makes the film come off even worse, because the cat goes through a lot in this movie and doesn't react to anything.  This cat is around crashing vehicles, rampaging monsters, and is even dunked into water at several points in the film, and it always looks like it's ready for a catnap.  This is the chillest fucking cat I've ever seen, when most would be freaking the fuck out.  Though, I guess I'm amazed at the crew found something to be in this movie that is more apathetic to what's going on than I am.


A Sacrifice
⭐️⭐️
Genre:  Thriller
Director:  Jordan Scott
Starring:  Eric Bana, Sadie Sink, Sylvia Hoeks


Eric Bana plays a psychiatrist who's daughter is being groomed by a dangerous cult in this crime thriller with a terrible title.  To be fair, A Sacrifice isn't terrible for those looking for the cinema equivalent of airplane novels.  It has an okay premise, looks decent, and is short as fuck.  I do wonder if any of this effort could have been put to better use creating something more compelling.  It's casually paced yet not very thorough and feels like it's goal is to kill the audience's time rather than hook them and put them on the edge of their seat.  A Sacrifice is like watching the production team of CSI try and recreate Silence of the Lambs from memory after seeing it once thirty years ago while on edibles and falling asleep halfway through.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater
Bad Boys:  Ride or Die ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Bikeriders ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Fall Guy ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Garfield Movie ⭐️⭐️1/2
IF ⭐️1/2
Inside Out 2 ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Thelma ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Streaming
The Boy and the Heron ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
Cabrini ⭐️⭐️
Ezra ⭐️⭐️1/2
Furiosa:  A Mad Max Saga ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
In a Violent Nature ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Summer Camp ⭐️
The Watchers ⭐️

New To Physical
The Boys in the Boat ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Monkey Man ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Coming Soon!