Cinema Playground Journal 2025: Week 19 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness

Clown in a Cornfield

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Horror, Comedy

Director:  Eli Craig

Starring:  Katie Douglas, Aaron Abrams, Carson MacCormac, Kevin Durand, Will Sasso

One of the stranger young adult novel series on the market finally gets a big screen adaptation, likely playing itself up to appeal straight to people who were raised on R.L. Stein but want just a tad more gore and risqué in their horror these days.  Or it will at least fill that void until Fear Street:  Prom Queen hits Netflix later this month.  Clown in a Cornfield follows a group of teenagers in a small Missouri town who make viral internet videos depicting their town mascot, Frendo the Clown, as a serial killer murdering unsuspecting citizens.  Their practical joke starts to turn on them when an actual serial killer dressed as Frendo starts stalking them in turn.  This either sounds stupid or generic, but that's because it is.  Clown in a Cornfield actually benefits from its simplistically silly premise because it knows exactly how to present it.  A movie called Clown in a Cornfield demands to not be taken seriously, and it's self-aware of this, knowing a movie with a story this goofy needs to have a goofy take on it.  This movie is really funny, almost surprisingly so.  This may not be that much of a shock to people familiar with the director, Eli Craig, who helmed Tucker & Dale vs. Evil, which I will admit to being one of those titles I've heard of but never saught out.  Clown in a Cornfield is good enough for me to correct that at some point, but in the meantime, I'd rather glow about how much fun I had during this movie, which brings traditional dead-of-night suspense/slasher and dive bombs it straight through a rambunctious teen comedy, where every one parties hard, lives life stupidly dangerous, and is slightly horny.  The film becomes reliant on two things:  how funny it is and how gruesome it is.  Clown in a Cornfield doesn't skimp on either, even crossing them over to make it even more delicious as its conflict ramps up.  The movie does lose some steam toward the end, where the clown loses its mask and we get to hear a villain monologue that is pretty much a load of "nobody cares."  That being said, that finale does bring about some generation gap and "kids these days" themes into the foreground, which the movie had been playing with off-and-on.  It even is the core of one of the funniest gags I've seen in a while, where a pair of teenage girls try to phone for help, but are unable to because they're boarderline gen Z/alpha and don't know how a rotary landline works, hearing the dial tone that smartphones don't have and shouting "I think the line is dead!"  I had an absolute blast with this movie, about as fun as I've had with the best of Evil Dead, Chucky, and Tremors, which are all my go-to horror/comedies of my personal admiration.  It's difficult for me to picture a horror fan who won't enjoy this movie.  The violence is chaoticly messy and its sense of humor is infectious.  The movie is horror movie hokum at its most gleefully entertaining.

Fight or Flight

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Action, Comedy

Director:  James Madigan

Starring:  Josh Hartnett, Katee Sackhoff, Charithra Chandron, Marko Zaror

Challenging Clown in a Cornfield for most tongue-in-cheek movie I saw this weekend is Fight or Flight, which sees disgraced American agent Josh Hartnett sent on a plane leaving Bangkok in search of a mysterious hacker, only for chaos to erupt when half of the passengers turn out to be bounty hunters.  The movie plays itself up for absurdity, as most of its violence is over-the-top and cartoonish, amping up a hyper-reality where everyone looks and behaves ridiculous.  The film's biggest drawback is that most of it is filmed in zoomed close-up, including the action, making it come off as choppy, likely to mask a low budget.  The movie's cheek does a lot of heavy lifting misdirection to make the movie seem ballistic.  A lot of its humor is pretty amusing, mostly centered on Hartnett, who plays the role of a man who is having a lousy day and doesn't want to be here, and will kill the people who are in his way mostly because he just doesn't want to deal with this bullshit right now.  It's fun, if flawed.  It might make a nice B-movie option in a double feature with Bullet Train, if nothing else.

Juliet & Romeo

⭐️

Genre:  Musical, Drama, Romance

Director:  Timothy Scott Bogart

Starring:  Clara Rugaard, Jamie Ward, Jason Isaacs, Dan Fogler, Rebel Wilson, Rupert Everett, Derek Jacobi

Juliet & Romeo is advertised as being based on the story that inspired Romeo & Juliet instead of a straight adaptation of the play itself...so, just ignore all the anachronisms and pop music embellishing this portrayal of Italy in the fourteenth century as we try to provide a reinterpretation the story of Romeo & Juliet while also trying to claim faithfulness to pre-Shakespeare text, yet evoking the Shakespeare play in its title because it seems afraid to distance itself too far from it.  It's hard not to be familiar with this story, mostly because it's the most iconic romance of all time, which sees two young members of fueding families who have fallen in love, defying their family allegiances.  Only now it's rewritten with modern lingo and set to the tune of a string of original power ballads that all sound exactly the same.  For the sake of artistic license and sex appeal...or something.  Maybe.  I'll be honest, I have no idea what this movie is trying to achieve.  All I know is that it's bad and I don't like it.

It's not often that a Shakespeare adaptation tosses Shakespeare's "Where for art thou, Romeo?" dialogue in the garbage can and makes up its own, which is usually reserved for reinventions like 10 Things I Hate About You or The Lion King.  Juliet & Romeo doesn't want to be seen as old-fashioned, so it opts for anachronism to appeal to tweens, while also pushing for classical color pop in an attempt to make it visually sumptuous in a traditional musical sense.  It gives the impression that it's fighting a notion that Shakespeare is something for old fuddy-duddies and aiming for youthful attention, albeit in a package that will be more dated in a few years than the Shakespeare play has gotten in centuries.  This isn't entirely without merit, because doing this exact thing to Romeo & Juliet is what gave birth to West Side Story (which is an archaic musical in of itself, but let's not get into that), but Juliet & Romeo is no West Side Story.  If anything, Juliet & Romeo shares DNA with a movie from a few years prior called Journey to Bethlehem, which was a similar pop musical adaptation of the Nativity.  I was softer of Journey to Bethlehem than I am Juliet & Romeo because, while it shared some of its more bizarre traits, I at least understood it.  Juliet & Romeo is a much more puzzling production, one that I'm spinning in circles trying to wrap my head around.  That, and the fact that faith cinema is mostly a landfill and throwing it a bone when something was moderately enjoyable wasn't going to hurt anyone.  Shakespeare adaptations are a far different landscape that is full of films that are worth checking out.  Romeo & Juliet has its own fair share, and Juliet & Romeo looks much worse standing next to them.  It's a dumpster-fire of a movie, one that was likely made with its heart on its sleeve and the purest of intentions but unable to offset the lack of a cohesive vision other than "Shakespeare, but singing."

The thing is that there is a part of me that wants to claim the movie is harmless, despite how much of a misfire it is.  This all changes by the time I get to the ending, which completely botches the assignment and does something so profoundly stupid that it could go down in history as one of the worst endings in cinema history.  An ending so terrible that it recontextualizes just how bad the movie is while you're experiencing it.  I'm going to throw spoiler caution to the wind when discussing this movie, mostly because nobody in their right mind would want to watch it, or, if they do want to see it, they likely aren't reading reviews for it and are likely assuming a Romeo & Juliet story ends the way Romeo & Juliet always ends.  Juliet & Romeo gets to the tragedy that defines the story, then shallowly reverses it, deflating the entire story in the process as the doomed lovers are given an antidote at the last moment, gasp back to life, and run off into the distance holding hands and is instantly followed by the text "To be continued...in Juliet & Romeo:  Book II."

::presses pillow into face to muffle my screaming into the void::

So, let's pretend this doesn't entirely miss the point of why Romeo & Juliet is a timeless story that has been passed down through generations, one of a love that has been smothered into lifelessness by the world around them and a conflict they want no part of.  Let's say that they did fake their deaths and ran off together.  The only reason to do this would be to give them a happily ever after away from the fued that almost killed them.  To then say "Stay tuned for The Further Adventures of Romeo & Juliet" even deflates that purpose.  From what little information I can find, the intent is supposed to be that this movie is supposed to be the first in a trilogy about the conflicts in Verona, Italy in the early 1300's, which is where the story of Romeo & Juliet stems from.  What I'm trying to figure out is why it is so important to keep the duo the main focus of the story, and why it needs to be done in such a frilly, feel-good production.  Nothing about this approach makes sense.  That's not even taking into account whether such productions ever take place, because the assumption that your audience is on-board for a hypothetical Romeo & Juliet Part II:  Romeo Returns and Part III:  Juliet's Revenge is a hugely presumptive idea, one that can only be done out of cockiness or if you already have those particular film shoots in the can.  Whether or not they already filmed these movies is something I cannot find any information on, which leads me to believe that they only have this one at the moment.  But these are indie films, so it could really go in any direction.  If they aren't set in stone, it could be one of those small potatoes franchises that is forced to change the cast with each movie because they have to let go of their bigger names in the quest for penny-pinching, and there are a few here.  Jason Isaacs, Rebel Wilson, Derek Jacobi, Rupert Everett, and even Dan Fogler, who isn't a huge name by himself, but select cinephiles do recognize him and go "Oh hey, it's that guy!"  I wouldn't even get attached to the unknowns in the title roles, because actors seek stability and prospects like these are unstable.

Juliet & Romeo is probably a contender for the worst movie of the year, could very well be one of the worst of the decade, and it's one I don't recommend actively seeking out.  In spite of that, it's really something that needs to be seen to be believed, and those with morbid curiosity might just feel a burning desire to need to have proof that someone actually made this movie.  I had seen the trailer for this movie a few weeks ago at a fucking movie about talking shoes, and was frozen in my seat with my head cocked to the side in an expression of "But why, though?"  I think I went to this screening looking for an answer, but I'm even more confused than before.

Shadow Force

⭐️1/2

Genre:  Action

Director:  Joe Carnahan

Starring:  Kerry Washington, Omar Sy, Mark Strong, Da'Vine Joy Randolph, Method Man

Yet another piece of violence this weekend sees notable action director Joe Carnahan releasing a movie into theaters with little-to-no fanfare.  You could almost say this Shadow Force movie was shadow dropped.  Shadow Force sees Kerry Washington and Omar Sy play estranged lovers from a secret military unit that disappeared and went into hiding, with Sy having taken their child.  When he accidentally blows his cover, the couple reunite to protect their dysfunctional family from the rest of their crew.  Shadow Force is a weird movie because it feels like it should be a Mr. & Mrs. Smith/True Lies style spy comedy, but it never quite settles in on the tone that's at the tip of its tongue.  Humor is in the movie, mostly delivered by Da'Vine Joy Randolph and child actor Jahleel Kamara, but they're the only ones playing with the vibe that this movie probably should have.  By comparison, Washington, Sy, and lead bad guy Mark Strong are all very stoic in this movie, and they commit to that end of the spectrum that is the exact opposite of what Randolph and Kamara are doing.  The dedication is admirable, even if it's ripping the movie in two.  One can't say that the cast and crew didn't put in the work to try and make Shadow Force cohesive, as action is serviceable and Washington and Sy try to give it heart.  The problem is that on a conceptual level the movie is fluff supplementing adrenaline.  The movie is never dramatically engaging nor exciting, though occasionally it is a little funny.  It's unfortunate that they didn't lean into the one thing it had going for it.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater

The Accountant² ⭐️⭐️⭐️

The Amateur ⭐️⭐️1/2

A Minecraft Movie ⭐️⭐️

Pride & Predjudice ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Sinners ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Snow White ⭐️⭐️

The Surfer ⭐️⭐️1/2

Thunderbolts ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Until Dawn ⭐️1/2

Warfare ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Digital

The Luckiest Man in America ⭐️⭐️1/2

Warfare ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Physical

The Seed of a Sacred Fig ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Coming Soon!

Cinema Playground Journal 2025: Week 18 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness

Bonjour Tristesse

⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Drama

Director:  Durga Chew-Bose

Starring:  Lily McInerny, Chloë Sevigny, Clays Bang, Aliocha Schneider, Naïlia Harzoune

There was actually a surprising amount of movies filling up the spare theaters this weekend, but very few of which I've actually heard of.  Usually even the little movies are ducking out of the way of Marvel anda surprise hit like Sinners, so let's find out what these movies are.  The first is an indie adaptation of the novel of the same name, a story of an eighteen-year-old spending the summer in the south of France, lamenting that her time there, and her youth, is almost at an end.  Meanwhile, she also struggles with the evolving nature of her father's love life, which she tries to manipulate back into what she wants it to be.  Bonjour Tristesse is a coming-of-age story that tackles that timely issue of fear of change, though it's inconsistent in how it goes about it.  Director Durga Chew-Bose spends a lot of time lingering on quiet shots, as if she's trying to tell a story without words, then blankets them with awkward ADR of conversations explaining the story out loud, stepping on the visual storytelling's feet.  Then she'll spend other lengthy periods just shooting the characters doing mundane things, like buttering toast or reading a newspaper, over-embelishing what should be establishing shots.  I'm pretty sure I understand the movie's lived-in-the-moment ambitions, but it also succumbs to a lack of efficiency.  And despite the film's meandering nature, some plot points still feel underdeveloped and unearned, which is quite an impressive feat in a bizarre way.  There are times where the film seemingly skips the emotional change of a character, sometimes outbursting with a sudden dynamic shift out of nowhere.  I rather like the story it's trying to tell, enough to say that it's probably worth seeking out in spite of its worst tendencies.  The movie is more frustrating than it is satisfying, though.

Raising the Bar:  The Alma Richards Story

⭐️

Genre:  Drama, Sports

Director:  T.C. Christensen

Starring:  Paul Wuthrich

Earnest, if dimwitted, biopic tells the story of Alma Richards, a farm boy from Utah who went on to win the gold medal in High Jump at the 1912 Olympics.  If only the movie that honored him had Olympic ambitions, but instead shoots for that "participant" trophy.  You get a rough idea of just how good this movie is going to be early on when it portrays Richards as a little boy and depicts him getting into a corral with a cow (that doesn't even have horns) as an act of bravery and ambition, trying to grab his sister's wicker basket.  He then proceeds to antagonize the cow until it chases him like he's a matador, even though if he really did live on a farm like the movie depicts, he would know that cows generally ignore people when they're in the same space, if not outright running from them.  He could have just hopped in and grabbed it without making an ass out of himself.  But the movie wants to be wholesome and life-affirming, not necessarily realistic, even though that seems a disservice to someone who lived in reality.  There's a certain flavor to this movie, like it's stylized itself after the type of sporty filmmaking you'd see in the 1930's, not far removed from when the film takes place.  Some of those films have aged better than others, but filmmaking styles evolve for a reason.  If the only ambition of a film is to be cheese-ball, I'd appreciate it more if it at least had a personality.  It would also benefit from having a main character who wasn't stagnant, only doing things to move the plot because someone tells him to and, in a good-ol'-boy fashion, just says "okie dokie."  Richards is basically the same character at the end of this movie that he is when it begins, learning very little except that he's good at jumping.  He has zero flaws except the people around him, who often resent his existence for no reason.  I suppose the movie is trying to portray him as the element that changes the environment around him and inspires people, but everyone in the movie is so stubborn that character change fails to happen until someone flips a switch and they suddenly decide to be better people because the script says so.

All of this is without mentioning the goofy little details of this movie that keep piling up and making the entire experience just plain weird.  Every time Richards is about to do a big jump, he's accompanied by a music cue that seems stolen from that episode of The Simpsons where Homer is playing baseball and he has a "magic bat" called "Wonderbat."  There is also a lady secretary late in the film and it is implied that she might be a love interest, but she has almost no dialogue and has no conversation with Richards himself other than exchanging dove eyes and being unable to just stop staring at each other.  The actual Olympics sequence is off-putting once you realize the background is full of a bunch of stationary blurry bodies that are obviously inserted by a computer.  Nobody moves in the slightest, until people start cheering, while most of them start clapping without actually looking in the direction of what's going on.  I'm not even sure this movie had the budget for digital mock-ups like this, which leads me to believe that these were either cheap stock CGI figures or there's a very real chance that this movie was completed with A.I.  If it's the latter, that undercuts what should be a story of human achievement and makes the entire movie even worse.  And it was already terrible to begin with.

Rosario

⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Horror

Director:  Felipe Vargas

Starring:  Emeraude Toubia, David Dastmalchian, José Zúñiga, Paul Ben-Victor

The titular Rosario is a successful investment banker whose estranged grandmother has passed away.  She spends the night with the body waiting for the ambulance to take it away, only for supernatural occurrences to happen in the apartment, seemingly revolving around her grandmother's corpse.  It's a little bit Autopsy of Jane Doe but with a Latin America flavor.  The film seems to be a horror movie made by the Latinx community specifically for the Latinx community, though whether or not it will be warmly received there is something I cannot attest to.  As a horror movie, it's not without its effective moments, though the scares tend to be cheap shock edits and just an all-around ick factor.  The movie ramps up some worthwhile creep-value in its third act, but it even loses a little bit of slack for piling on one climax too many.  The movie does make up some ground with some interesting themes, such as familial bonds, the lives of the generations before you, and the sacrifices one makes for their children.  The movie is not bad, and with some fine-tuning, it probably could be something special.  It's a flat experience in its current state, though.

The Surfer

⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Thriller

Director:  Lorcan Finnegan

Starring:  Nicolas Cage, Julian McMahon, Nic Cassim, Miranda Tapsell, Alexander Bertrand, Justin Rosniak

Nicolas Cage just wants to go surfing.  Why won't you let him go surfing?  Pushed off the beach by elitist locals, Cage descends into madness while everything in his life crumbles around him as he stares longingly at the ocean.  The film is a very particular type of psychological thriller, likely designed to play better with some audiences better than others.  Those who just want Cage to get unhinged and seek vengeance on his tormentors are looking at the wrong movie.  Cage gets unhinged, sure enough.  Quite a bit.  The entire focus of the film is just how unhinged he is.  It has little gaze for anything else.  The film plays with interesting themes, such as masculine identity and the fragility of modern convenience, and it's all done in the style of a 70's grindhouse indie thriller.  All of those aspects work in its favor, it just never really gives us a reason for why Cage is here.  I get that he wants to go surfing, I get the unfair circumstances that he doesn't want to cave into, but several of his more extreme problems would be solved if he just went home, at least for a couple of hours, even to just charge his goddamn phone.  But the film wants to get into the psychology of those who feel helpless at the unfair circumstances surrounding them.  To that end, it's a success.  It doesn't really aim all that high in doing so, but it's a minor victory.

Thunderbolts

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Action, Superhero

Director:  Jake Schreier

Starring:  Florence Pugh, Sebastian Stan, Wyatt Russell, David Harbour, Hannah John-Kamen, Lewis Pullman, Olga Kurelenko, Julia-Louis Dreyfus, Geraldine Viswanathan

I know that it's becoming more in-trend to hate on the MCU, though I'm not sure how much of it is because the MCU has been less consistent as of late (which is true) and how much of it is because they now have poorly recieved movies under their belt and now there is blood in the water, which the social media feeding frenzy shows signs of engagement sharks looking for easy click farming.  But it is fair to note that Marvel isn't the brand that it was pre-pandemic.  You can point to Deadpool & Wolverine as a sign that it never really left, but that film was the exception to the rule, as it was more of a nostalgia power play to Deadpool lovers, Hugh Jackman fans, and people with fond memories of Fox's X-Men franchise than an actual MCU movie.  And, to be quite frank, Captain America:  Brave New World was just disheartening to watch and easily voided whatever accomplishment Deadpool & Wolverine had.  Conclusion:  The MCU does need a jolt to the cajones.  Is Thunderbolts it?  Marvel's issues right now are deeper than "Just make a good movie."  If anything, they need to lure wandering eyeballs back.  Just being a good movie might be too humble an accomplishment to do that, but it's a start.  And Thunderbolts is a really good movie.  Hopefully a few eyes will see that it's worth a look.

The comic Thunderbolts were a team of villians and anti-heros, which the film stays true to by casting a bunch of morally shady characters, some of which were antagonistic in previous appearances, but are mostly just down-on-their-luck losers.  Thunderbolts uses this to its thematic advantage to tell a tale of broken people who struggle to find a reason to get out of bed every day.  The team is brought together by a government official who thinks of them as expendable, and they journey from being thrown in the garbage to proving to themselves that maybe there is something worthy inside of them to keep fighting for.  An internal battle, not a physical battle.  That physical battle also happens.  The heroes include Yelana Belova (see:  Black Widow, Hawkeye), adopted sister of Natasha Romanoff and fellow Black Widow; Alexei Shostakov/Red Guardian (see:  Black Widow), the Russian attempt to create their own Captain America; John Walker/U.S. Agent (see:  The Falcon and the Winter Soldier), America's own failed attempt to replace Captain America; and Ava Starr/Ghost (see:  Ant-Man and the Wasp), a lady who can phase her body through solid objects.  Also, MCU mainstay Bucky is here, because we all love Bucky.  They form a unit in the loosest sense of the word, because they all are bitter people stuck with other people who are just as bitter as they are, creating a humorous personality clash.  It becomes more evident that the story of the movie relies on the age-old idea of "misery loves company," as they become unexpectedly reliant on each other by film's end.  Who else is going to have your back if it's not someone who understands what you're going through?

The climax of the movie compounds its themes, and we are thrust in a situation that the main characters can't punch in the face, no matter how much they want to.  The movie takes a cerebral turn, as the characters battle a state-of-mind rather than a physical entity, and it's something that feeds on aggression and grows weaker with outside support.  It's a spectacle in its own way, and those who need top-to-bottom fisticuffs in their action adventures might be disappointed in it.  The right people will understand it.  The right people will identify with it.  A Marvel movie has been made where the solution isn't kicking really hard or blowing something up.  A Marvel movie has been made with a thematic climax of therapeutic embrace and support, promising that one might be the sum of their worst mistakes, but a real hero lives with them and moves forward.  Without spoiling anything, I love the fate of the film's antagonist, because it's such a hopeful outcome for such a dark storyline.

Gripes can only be minor.  The movie's break neck pace is a bit of a disservice to some elements, and the quips sometimes fly at awkward times and fail to land.  Also, one character in particular is done so dirty in this movie, and I am kinda peeved about it.  It doesn't off-set what is a mostly spectacular experience, which is destined to be in a rotation of superhero comfort watches.  It's the most entertaining MCU film since Multiverse of Madness, the most thematically resonate one since Wakanda Forever, and probably my favorite one since Infinity War.  It's presumptuous to say "Marvel is BACK!," but I'm always pleased to know that they can still create a good time.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater

The Accountant² ⭐️⭐️⭐️

The Amateur ⭐️⭐️1/2

The Legend of Ochi ⭐️⭐️

A Minecraft Movie ⭐️⭐️

Pride & Predjudice ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Sinners ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Until Dawn ⭐️1/2

Warfare ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Digital

Day of Reckoning ⭐️⭐️1/2

Death of a Unicorn ⭐️⭐️1/2

Drop ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Physical

Anora ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Last Breath ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Paddington in Peru ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Star Trek:  Section 31 ⭐️1/2

Coming Soon!

Cinema Playground Journal 2025: Week 17 ( My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness

The Accountant²

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Action, Thriller

Director:  Gavin O'Connor

Starring:  Ben Affleck, Jon Bernthal, Cynthia Addai-Robinson, Daniella Pineda, J.K. Simmons

The Accountant is back.  Whether we wanted him back is not something I don't know for certain, since the first movie is nine years old and more of a passive time-waster than something fondly remembered.  But sure enough, Ben Affleck is reprising his role as the accountant/asskicker whose autism is a superpower and he finds himself trying to solve the last case of former F.B.I. associate J.K. Simmons while also bonding with his estranged brother, Jon Bernthal.  I'm not sure what I expected from an Accountant sequel, but the film's u-turn in tone was something of a pleasant surprise.  It's a more entertaining film than the first one, as Affleck is allowed to play off of other characters for longer periods.  Jon Bernthal is a fun foil for him to interplay with, as his no-bullshit persona contrasts Affleck's unique personality in humorous ways.  The movie isn't fully a comedy, though the attempted levity does provide relief from being as dour as the first film could get.  Some of its plot points are goofy, which limits its appeal outside of the demographic who sees most movies like this anyway, but it's an entertaining sit-down for those who do.

The Legend of Ochi

⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Fantasy, Adventure

Director:  Isaiah Saxon

Starting:  Helena Zengel, Willem Dafoe, Emily Watson, Finn Wolfhard

If A24 is going to do a family movie, then it's going to do it the A24 way.  In other words, get ready for a children's movie that no adult in their right mind would take their kids to see.  The Legend of Ochi is a bizarre and quirky homage to that 80's subgenre of E.T. knockoffs, seeing a young girl rescue a young wild creature that is supposedly dangerous, known as an Ochi, which she strikes a friendship with and quests to return it home.  The movie is well-made and ambitiously unconventional in its presentation of a conventional story.  Sadly, the conventional and the unconventional don't offset each other, and the movie never rises beyond just being an idiosyncratic version of Mac and Me.  The movie is just not very fun to watch, in spite of having the vibes of a movie that is only made for the director's own amusement.  I also wonder just how many 80's throwbacks they're going to shove Finn Wolfhard into.  Stranger Things, It, Ghostbusters, Hell of a Summer, and now this.  Is this what we've decided he's destined to do?  Congratulations for getting Willem Dafoe in that medieval armor, though.

On Swift Horses

⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Drama, Romance

Director:  Daniel Minahan

Starring:  Daisy Edgar-Jones, Jacob Elordi, Will Poulter, Diego Calva, Sasha Calle

Love triangles galore in this so-so to acceptable melodrama based on the 2019 novel of the same name, seeing two queer love stories playing out against the repressive backdrop of the 1950's.  The first sees Jocob Elordi begin a risky and frisky relationship with fellow hustler and casino worker Diego Calva.  The second sees the fiancée of Elordi's brother, Daisy Edgar-Jones, questioning her sexuality as she starts a lesbian affair with Sasha Calle.  On Swift Horses is more about inner turmoil than about romance, showing two people who evolve as they're romantic ideals are challenged, showcasing a freedom that comes with it and also a unique fear within it.  The movie hones in on the nuance of Elordi and Edgar-Jones, who are given a tall task in talking with their eyes and not allowing themselves to say their secrets out loud.  One wishes it would stay that way because the more on-the-nose conversations are less compelling.  This is a tricky movie to make because it wants to say a lot and it's not always allowed to do so, so when it allows itself freedom, it gets messier.  The movie is already in a state of mopeyness throughout, so when it cranks it up to eleven, it can be a pain in the ass.  It's not bad, and its ambition is well-intentioned.  It's just not quite hitting all the right notes.

Until Dawn

⭐️1/2

Genre:  Horror

Director:  David F. Sandberg

Starring:  Ella Rubin, Michael Cimino, Odessa A'zion, Ji-young Yoo, Belmont Cameli, Maia Mitchell, Peter Stormare

When is an adaptation no longer an adaptation?  Asking for video game movies.  We're a long way from the day when video game stories were "guy in red hat kicks a turtle" and we're seeing films based on games that have full-blown stories and they're still overthinking how to make them.  Until Dawn, for example, is less of a game and more of a choose-your-own-adventure story.  It's also a bit of a crazy video game to adapt because the idea of the game is that it leans into horror genre tropes and presents themselves as an interactive experience to see how well players/horror fanatics can guide its characters through them, the goal being getting everyone out alive.  Doing a straight adaptation of Until Dawn would just result in a generic horror movie, but Until Dawn also has a very specific storyline and I'm not sure how you can call your movie Until Dawn if you're not going to do Until Dawn.  The only other thing that's a part of Until Dawn's identity is its interactivity, which is something you can't do in a theater.  Similar things have been done before, such as a DVD special presentation of Final Destination 3 or the Netflix Black Mirror special Bandersnatch, but those were home media experimentation pieces.  A theatrical movie is one product, one story, and one presentation.  So, they decided to slingshot us back to a time where they created an original storyline and slapped a video game title on it for IP marketing reasons.

I'd say this bothers me but I was raised on video game movies like Super Mario Bros., Double Dragon, Street Fighter, and Resident Evil.  The most faithful video game adaptation from my generation was Mortal Kombat, while almost every other movie took recognizable aesthetics and character designs and tossed everything else.  I'd be really cross about an Until Dawn movie that does the same, but I don't have the energy.  So, I'm ready to take this movie on its own terms.

For context, the Until Dawn game is a basic "Cabin in the Woods" premise that centers on a group of friends spending the night in a mountain lodge only to have beasties surround the place and terrorize them by doing monster things.  This movie also centers on a group of friends, only they're searching for a friend who has been missing for a year.  Their search leads them to a lodge in the woods, where they find themselves in the middle of horror scenarios that end in their deaths, repeating the night on an endless loop until they either die for good or finally survive the night.  I think the idea behind this movie is based on the fact that Until Dawn is an intensely replayable game that you can go through multipal times in hopes to get a different outcome.  The issue is that even when you replay the game, certain core elements of it are exactly the same.  You might travel down a different scenario and find a new cutscene, but what's out to get you is a constant and doesn't really evolve and while the player retains knowledge of the previous playthrough, the characters they are controlling do not.  The "death loop" would probably be a more apt idea to apply to this if it wasn't constantly shifting to keep the audience on its toes.  But then it would just be a Happy Death Day clone, and Happy Death Day wasn't even the first movie to milk that concept.  A quick rundown of things in the game that are actually present in the movie:  both feature Peter Stormare, the monsters from the game (gamers know what they are) do have a role in the movie, and the film ends implying that the events of the game have happened, will happen, or happen concurrently.  If nothing else, the movie at least wants gamers to think this is one big, unhappy universe, even if the time loop bullshit has nothing to do with Until Dawn.

Even ignoring the constant nagging thought of "Why the hell is this the Until Dawn movie?," Until Dawn just sucks.  The movie is a gauntlet of horror ideas without living in them long enough to generate suspense, have fun with them, or flesh them out.  It's like a tornado of different horror movies sucking the viewer up and spitting them out without really knowing what hit you.  I'm sure this movie is convincing itself that it's a loving homage to the spectrum of horror scenarios but all it became was a series of empty ideas that are dragging the audience into a chaotic experience that doesn't reward the patience it takes to sit through it.  One gains the idea that it is a movie that is more fun to make than it is to watch, as the group of actors get to do a full series of horror movie death scenes, which is probably the dream role for any horror actor.  Unfortunately, few of the death scenes are memorable and the one that does have staying power in your brain, the "drinking the water" bit, is one that is both nonsensical and is shared by everyone.  It's surprising that David F. Sandberg made this movie because his previous horror films, Lights Out and Annabelle:  Creation, showed that he was an excellent craftsman of tension.  Until Dawn isn't nearly as tense as his best work, as the movie's hectic pace and seemingly non-existent stakes prevent him from creating any memorable sequences of slow-building dread.  What Sandberg does achieve, quite well, is that the movie does indeed look like the game that inspired it.  The cinematography and murky mood does replicate a strong visual kinship, ensuring that there is a proper Until Dawn movie in here somewhere.  Unfortunately, this ain't it.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater

The Amateur ⭐️⭐️1/2

Drop ⭐️⭐️⭐️

A Minecraft Movie ⭐️⭐️

Pride & Predjudice ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Sinners ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Star Wars:  Episode III - Revenge of the Sith ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Warfare ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Digital

Ash ⭐️⭐️1/2

Hell of a Summer ⭐️⭐️1/2

Locked ⭐️⭐️⭐️

New To Physical

Lost on a Mountain in Maine ⭐️1/2

Coming Soon!

Cinema Playground Journal 2025: Week 16 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness

Sinners

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Horror, Action

Director:  Ryan Cooglar

Starring:  Michael B. Jordan, Hailee Steinfeld, Miles Caton, Jack O'Donnell, Wunmi Mosaku, Jayme Lawson, Omar Miller, Buddy Guy, Delroy Lindo

After playing around in both the Marvel and Rocky franchises, director Ryan Coogler is in a position where he can make whatever he wants, and he said "I want to make a vampire movie."  That's how you know he's a real one.  Sinners takes place in 1932 Mississippi, where a pair of twins named Smoke and Stack (both played by longtime Coogler collaborator Michael B. Jordan) open a jukebar for minorities to smoke, drink, dance, and mingle in.  Opening night proves problematic when a group of vampires show up at the door and turn the patrons one-by-one.  Sinners is at its best when Coogler is creating grindhouse spectacle, with setpieces that toe the line between grimey and beautiful as the film dips in-and-out of being a horror movie, an action movie, a noir, and even a little bit of a musical.  The crossbreeding is chaotic but inspires great visual marvel.  It's interesting to watch Coogler work the elements in this film, seeing what he pulls back from and what he goes full-throttle on.  It also results in a movie that is a little too busy, with several elements that drift nowhere and certain thematic material that the movie sometimes struggles to connect properly into its carnage.  However, it's hard to blame Coogler for leaning into the stylish dark entertainer that he's creating, who seems to be just going where the night takes him.  Even if Sinners waves off its imperfections, the movie is so electrifying that it makes one eager to see what other original projects Coogler can cook up in the future.

Sneaks

⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Comedy, Adventure

Director:  Rob Edwards, Chris Jenkins

Starring:  Anthony Mackie, Martin Lawrence, Chloe Bailey, Keith David, Lawrence Fishburn

In the tradition of animated movie portraying inanimate objects with sentience that go on adventures, Sneaks is a movie about talking shoes, probably made by people who were traumatized by a certain scene in Who Framed Roger Rabbit and dedicated and entire movie to their therapy.  Anthony Mackie plays an expensive sneaker who is stolen by a collector, only to be separated with his sister and lost on the streets of New York.  The movie seems to be an homage to NYC street culture and brotherhood made by people who want the audience to walk in a character's shoes through the eyes of literal shoes.  Where the movie goes wrong is that it's largely a bunch of tropes and plot points that are stolen from, and, frankly, done better by, the Toy Story franchise.  Very little about the movie is interesting, even if the animation sometimes charms with its influences from stop-motion and graffiti art (the movie's opening credit sequence is a colorful highlight).  The movie's entertainment value is also limited because its comedy isn't clever enough to find inspiration in its premise, with even comedy veteran Martin Lawrence struggling to elevate the script he's given.  It's difficult to say exactly how good this movie could have been, but it's also not the best possible version of itself.

The Ugly Stepsister

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Horror, Drama

Director:  Emilie Blichfeldt

Starring:  Lea Myren, Thea Sofie Loch Næss, Ann Dahl Torp, Flo Fagerli, Isac Calmroth, Malte Gårdinger

One would be forgiven in assuming that The Ugly Stepsister is one of those slasher movies based on public domain properties that have flooded the market as of late.  Those who do would be sorely mistaken, however.  The Ugly Stepsister is certainly a dark retelling of the Cinderella story but the lens it views it through offers a fresh perspective that actually casts a light on the tale that makes it seem less wholesome than a Disney cartoon would have you believe.  Told through the eyes of the titular "Ugly Stepsister" (the actress playing her is actually quite attractive, but let's not dwell on that), this film sees her invited to a ball where a prince is to choose his virgin bride.  As the ball approaches, she indulges in mentally and physically unhealthy lengths to become more beautiful and win his heart, while also facing competition from her fairer stepsister.

The Ugly Stepsister is not so much a fairy tale with a twist, as it's actually interesting at how faithful it is to the traditional story, but rather it recontextualizes it and analyzes certain questionable messages of body image that it puts forth.  To call this movie a dark reinterpretation of Cinderella would be understating it because it's also a deeply cynical satire of beauty standards and the longing of an outsider to meet them.  Very few films this cynical can weild their cynicism this intelligently, though.  The movie is intensely uncomfortable, as almost every character has questionable ethics, with the main character almost turning herself into a Frankenstein's monster in order to be seen the way she wants to be seen.  Meanwhile, the Cinderella character herself isn't free of toxic traits, portrayed as a self-absorbed girl who was denied the privilege of going to the ball not because she outshined her sister, but because the ball was under the presumption of virginity and she was caught screwing a stable boy.  It's also very much implied that she see doesn't see her stepsister as an equal, denying all attempts at bonding with her and constantly looking at her with a glare of pity and loathing.  It's a commentary on the morality at the center of the classic story, where ugly people are seen as awful people and the attractive will always unite to be beautiful together and look down upon them.  The movie even questions the "beauty on the inside" metaphor, concluding that even if it were the truth, such people will constantly be treated as outsiders.  It's a fascinating movie, if deeply depressing.  I can't deny its brilliance, though.

The Wedding Banquet

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Comedy, Drama, Romance

Director:  Andrew Ahn

Starring:  Bowen Yang, Lily Gladstone, Kelly Marie Tran, Han Gi-chan, Joan Chen, Youn Yuh-jung

I've never been one to be bitter and resentful of remakes for the crime of existing.  I think good stories can and should aspire for generational relevance.  I'm also realizing that I'm at the age where I'm seeing more and more movies released within my lifetime getting remakes, thinking "But that movie only came out in..." and suddenly realizing it was over thirty years ago and then being angry at the remake because it made me realize how old I am.  I haven't seen the original Wedding Banquet, mostly because it's not really easy accessible at this point (it's not streaming anywhere and it's last home media release is on third party market for $700), but it seems to be a pillar in LGBTQ cinema, as well as an early film for Ang Lee, the Oscar winning director of arguably the most iconic gay love story in film history, Brokeback Mountain.  The original film was from Taiwan, while this new film is an American production from Korean filmmakers, telling the story of a gay Korean man and a lesbian putting on a sham marriage to placate his disapproving grandparents and stay in America.  The film is updated from its original idea, likely in service to the LGBTQ audience, which is in a different place than it was in the 90's, while adding subplots that contemplate the spectrum of identity and how it goes beyond society labels.  The characters relationships are strong, tender, and familial, backed up with exceptional performances, which include Oscar nominees Lily Gladstone and Kelly Marie Tran, Oscar winner Youn Yuh-jung, and Saturday Night Live performer Bowen Yang.  The movie has a lot of spirit and heart, is often very funny, and a lot of fun to watch.  I'm not sure if it can or should replace the original, but if one is in the neighborhood for a queer love story, it's one that will enchant.

Art Attack

The Ballad of Wallis Island

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Comedy, Drama

Director:  James Griffiths

Starring:  Tom Basden, Tim Key, Carey Mulligan

A pair of movies that have been advertised at my Regal cinemas decided not to play at them at all on the same week. This could partially be because my cineplex is going through remodeling, which means several of their theaters are shut down, but it's probably mostly because Minecraft is sucking the air out of the room.  Unfortunate as it may be, these smaller productions made their way to my arthouse, so I decided to spend money on them rather than use a subscription pass, so they're getting my money and Minecraft did not.  So there.

The first of these movies is a British dramedy about a laid back and offbeat rich man who hires a folk singer for a private event at the island he resides, who also didn't tell him that he also invited his former partner (both professionally and romantically) to play the engagement with him.  It's a quirky idea that plays up with awkward interaction and wry British humor, not only at the expense of the main couple but also at the fact that a famed music duo is stuck in a quaint and remote location with very few people who probably have not heard of them.  The humor is very rich, often coming from a very human center to ground it even at its most eccentric moments.  It doesn't offset how quiet and contemplative the film is, which is centered on people who have lost their passion, are stuck mulling over the past, and rediscovering their spark to help them move forward where hopefully they'll regain it fully in the future.  The movie is wise enough to not jump into the safety net of reliving passion through the past, ensuring that life must move forward, whether it's the outcome you want or not.  Several aspects are left unresolved as a result but it's perfect for the story it's telling.  The conclusion is psychological.  You just need to know where to find it.

Bob Trevino Likes It

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Comedy, Drama

Director:  Tracie Laymon

Starring:  Barbie Ferreira, John Leguizamo, French Stewart

This dramedy is seemingly based on a real experience that happened to director Tracie Laymon, who reached out to a man named Bob on Facebook wondering if they were related only to become close friends.  Whether or not the movie's more heavy subject material is true to her life or not or an inspiration based on the film's theme of chosen family is not something I can say for certain, though Laymon certainly poured her heart into a movie that is overly sentimental but feels perfectly authentic.  The film follows a similar idea, centering on a woman who hails from a neglectful family and is down on her luck, finding a father figure in a stranger on Facebook who engages with her posts.  While her actions may seem over-the-top or obnoxious to some viewers, the film is actually very authentic to that desperation for positive attention and engagement in the life of someone who has been emotionally abused and is antisocial as a result, and the performance by Barbie Ferreira is quite spot-on and sympathetic.  She perfectly encapsulates a desire to rebuild her life from the ground up without an idea as to how and using her relationship with Bob, played by a warm and engaged John Leguizamo, as a foundation for a new life.  If there is something that holds the movie back, it's that it skims over and underdevelops some of its more meaningful supporting players, such as Ferreira's father, played by French Stewart.  We get the idea that he is a selfish jerk, but if there is any reason he is so bitterly resentful of his daughter, we don't get to hear it.  But the primary focus is Ferreira, and she shines in a role that some might find it difficult to understand but the right people will.  And this movie will mean everything to those that do.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater

The Amateur ⭐️⭐️1/2

Drop ⭐️⭐️⭐️

A Minecraft Movie ⭐️⭐️

Pride & Predjudice ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Snow White ⭐️⭐️

Warfare ⭐️⭐️⭐️

The Woman in the Yard ⭐⭐

A Working Man ⭐⭐

New To Digital

Captain America:  Brave New World ⭐️1/2

The Day the Earth Blew Up ⭐️⭐️1/2

The Woman in the Yard ⭐⭐

A Working Man ⭐⭐

New To Physical

Heart Eyes ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Sonic the Hedgehog 3 ⭐️⭐️1/2

Coming Soon!

Cinema Playgroung Journal 2025: Week 15 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness

The Amateur

⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Thriller

Director:  James Hawes

Starring:  Rami Malek, Laurence Fishburn, Rachel Brosnahan, Caitriona Balfe, Michael Stuhlbarg

The second film adaptation of a 1981 spy thriller novel, The Amateur sees C.I.A. computer analyst Rami Malek seeking vengeance after his wife was killed in a terrorist attack.  Without the support of his.government, Malek seeks the individuals responsible and tries to assassinate them, albeit without the training most would-be assassin's would have.  The Amateur is a movie made strictly for those who consume a hearty diet of espionage, thriller, and revenge novels, never missing anything from Robert Ludlam and Tom Clancy while also having a hefty shelf of Jack Reacher and Alex Cross books.  The question is how well it plays up to this audience, and the answer is a soft "good enough."  The primary issue with this movie is how base it is, without going out of its way for detail.  We trust that Malek and wife Rachel Brosnahan have a loving relationship based on fond glances over coffee.  Meanwhile, Brosnahan's death is the purest definition of the writer's term called "fridging," an overused plot point where a person's lover or spouse is murdered and sets the the main character up for a vendetta.  But what really kills it is that Brosnahan's role is so barren, and even her death is only shown in fragments with the actual moment she died never shown.  It's weird framing, because I half-suspected the movie to end with a twist that she was alive the whole time because that's the usual rule of thumb when you never see a body.  Spoiler alert:  that doesn't happen.  The movie is more straightforward than that.  Maybe thankfully, because it doesn't insult the audience by trying to outsmart them.  But as a suspense film, it's pretty okay, even if actual suspense is lacking.  The movie is filmed very neutrally, depicting scenes of thrills so casually that it sucks excitement out of them.  Setpieces happen suddenly and without zest, which means the only thing creating tension are the actors' determined glares.  The Amateur probably would have been more exciting in the 90's when there were quite a few movies like this, but that also might just be optimistic to think it could stand out from the competition.

Drop

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Thriller

Director:  Christopher Landon

Starring:  Meghann Fahy, Brandon Sklenar, Violett Bean, Jeffery Self

Drop marks the first time Christopher Landon hasn't at least co-written the movie he's directing, which may or may not be him jumping into a hired gun project super fast after dropping out of Scream 7 amidst the nuclear fallout of that movie's production woes.  Landon is best known for his tongue-in-cheek genre benders like Happy Death Day and Freaky, while also writing most of the Paranormal Activity sequels (and directing The Marked Ones).  Drop is probably his least comedic movie since playing with the iconic found footage franchise, though that's probably refreshing after the minor misfire of his previous movie, We Have a Ghost, which was a rather tame attempt at a supernatural family comedy.  This time, he's handed a (mostly) single-room Hitchcockian suspense film where a woman is on a date and being pressured through social media notifications to kill her date, with her son being held hostage for leverage.  Landon proves very adept at leaning in a different direction than his usual fare, crafting a taut and exciting pulp mystery out of the script he's handed.  The mystery is a little lax, because while the film introduces an adequate amount of red harrings, the culprit is one of the few people that the movie seems to be actively misdirecting away from and trying to make us not think about by their lack of relevance.  It's probably not something most people will notice, but if you have screenplay brain, the movie's masking is more obvious than it thinks it is.  It doesn't stop the movie's entertainment value.  Despite several instances of strained logic that the movie doesn't keep up with, the film winds up being Landon's most well-rounded, stylish, and interesting movie.  It's a fun date night movie, if only to be glad your date hasn't gone quite as wrong as the one on-screen.

Warfare

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Genre:  War, Thriller

Director:  Ray Mendoza, Alex Garland

Starring:  D'Pharaoh Woon-A-Tai, Will Poulter, Cosmo Jarvis, Kit Connor, Finn Bennett, Joseph Quinn, Charles Melton

Evidently, Alex Garland hammered out a pitch with his military supervisor for last year's Civil War, Ray Mendoza, and the two opted to co-direct a feature offering a realistic look at a pinned down military group during the Iraq War.  The film is based on a first-hand experience that he had during combat, opting to be a genuine depiction of what it's like to be in a seemingly hopeless situation where they're cornered, taking casualties, and with limited options.  As such, Warfare isn't a story.  It's ambitions are heavier, as it wants to throw the viewer into the experience of active warfare.  It's both a simple movie and a complicated movie in that respect, succeeding at its goals even if it never tries to surpass them.  It's admirable that they achieved what is quite possibly the most realistic depiction of military duty I've ever seen on film, but there is also little to say about it except "Oh, wow."

Movies Still Playing At My Theater

Death of a Unicorn ⭐⭐1/2

The Friend ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Hell of a Summer ⭐️⭐️1/2

The Luckiest Man in America ⭐️⭐️1/2

A Minecraft Movie ⭐️⭐️

Snow White ⭐️⭐️

The Woman in the Yard ⭐⭐

A Working Man ⭐⭐

New To Digital

In the Lost Lands ⭐️⭐️

Magazine Dreams ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Mickey 17 ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Novocane ⭐️⭐️1/2

The Rule of Jenny Pen ⭐️⭐️

Coming Soon!

Cinema Playground Journal 2025: Week 14 (My Cinema Playground)

Multiplex Madness

The Friend

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Drama

Director:  Scott McGehee, David Siegel

Starring:  Naomi Watts, Bill Murray, Sarah Pidgeon, Carla Gugino, Constance Wu, Ann Dowd

In this adaptation of a novel of the same name, Naomi Watts plays a writer whose mentor, Bill Murray, commits suicide, and she inherits his rather large Great Dane afterwards.  Together, they both size each other up while also processing their own grief in their own ways.  The Friend is yet another "power of pets" movie about companionship, of which there probably isn't a lot new that can be done in a relationship between human and canine in a movie at this point.  The film's psychological aspect proves more intriguing, as Watts deals with a sudden loss while also learning to live with the one thing he left behind.  The movie is about turmoil as much as friendship, the pondering of a continuing life after another's has ended.  It's more of a poem than a story.  It doesn't even seem certain of what it's saying but taking solace in what is currently happening over what has happened or will happen.  The movie does struggle to settle on a definitive ending, finding itself stretching into an epilogue long past its logical conclusion point, even climaxing with a bit of a prank that makes you think of unfair inevitability.  I don't know how much of a spoiler that is, but it's an interesting moment that it wallows in then pulls back on, almost saying that you can think of the inevitable, but it hasn't happened yet, so don't waste your time.  I kinda like that message, if I'm being honest.

Hell of a Summer

⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Comedy, Horror

Director:  Finn Wolfhard, Billy Bryk

Starring:  Finn Wolfhard, Billy Bryk, Abby Quinn, Fred Hechinger, D'Pharaoh Woon-A-Tai

I sometimes wonder at where the line is before making fun of horror movie tropes becomes a trope in of itself.  But I've never been one to believe that just because a movie attempts to be subversive automatically makes it a good attempt at subversion.  If it did, I would think more highly of movies like Cabin in the Woods and You're Next, movies that show effort on full display but just broke their own movie with a very dimwitted definition of "cleverness."  We might as well just admit Scream did it best and it's probably not going to be topped, even if we do occasionally get a Behind the Mask:  The Rise of Leslie Vernon.  I would encourage any movie to try and have fun with itself, but only something special can outthink its genre and truly get away with it.

Hell of a Summer is a movie that takes the Friday the 13th setting of counselors dying at summer camp and turns it into a goofball subversive comedy made by zoomers for zoomers.  There is very little to the movie with the exception of young actors saying sitcom lines of dialogue during and after tame horror scenes.  If the movie had a laugh track, it would be a Roseanne Halloween special.  It's not about spooking the audience but having a laugh while paying homage to better movies.  It's pretty clear the only reason the movie exists is because Finn Wolfhard made a hell of a lot of money from doing Stranger Things and It and is jumping right into trying to give directing a shot.  I'm happy that he's in a position to expand his horizons and cut his teeth with something fun, but I would probably hope that if he has a future in this department that he would start making movies that don't play out like a self-written ensemble piece for high school drama club.  Every stab at humor is played up to amuse bored teenagers who just happen to be there but really just want to go home.  It's not an unpleasant experience, just not one that's worth going out of its way to see unless your kids are in it and want to offer moral support.

The Luckiest Man in America

⭐️⭐️1/2

Genre:  Drama

Director:  Samir Oliveros

Starring:  Paul Walter Hauser, Walton Goggins, Shamier Anderson, David Strathairn, Masie Williams

Press Your Luck was my favorite game show when I was a kid.  This was mostly for the silly "Whammy" cartoons at the bottom of the screen, but the game itself was always a fun bit of "play to win but risk it all by doing so."  Years later, I watched one of those documentaries someone made about Michael Larson, who at the time had won the most money in the history of game shows by gaming the system (since been beaten, but at the time it was a big deal).  While watching it, I sat up in my seat and went "I've seen that guy!  I've seen this episode!"  I'm not sure if I watched it when it first aired, but I know I definitely watched it in reruns when I switched over to Game Show Network on boring afternoons.  It didn't occur to me at the time that he was maybe cheating the game, even though my OCD mind had noticed the similar patterns in the Press Your Luck wheel that he did, but I never really applied myself into figuring it out.  But in watching the story unfold, everything about his appearance suddenly had a new context that I had found fascinating.

The Luckiest Man in America is Larson's story of this low-level grifter and his appearance on that game show, chronicling how he memorized the board patterns into winning over a hundred thousand dollars on a show that normally only handed out about five to fifteen.  There are certain levels of detail that the film amused me with, right down to his fellow contestants, which included a guy at his right who was just happy to be there and a woman at his left who is getting increasingly pissed off because she's not getting a chance to play.  Even Larson's wardrobe is a kick, because he's dressed for television above the desk, but wearing a simple pair of khaki shorts underneath.  The little details are where this movie shines, as well as a quality central performance by Paul Walter Hauser, who is one of the most underappreciated actors currently working and is, quite frankly, perfectly cast as Larson.

The movie's attempts to spice up the story winds up hurting it.  Granted, Larson's appearance on Press Your Luck was the highlight of his life story, and the movie wants to prolong it as long as possible by making it the primary setting, but the unfolding of the context of who exactly this guy is while the game show is going on stretches credibility.  It's true that there was craziness behind the scenes by people who were trying to figure out what Larson was doing to this simple game show, but some of this is just nonsense.  The movie is at its best when it's not trying anything special and just letting Larson play and beat a bunch of suits at a game they created to give the illusion of Hollywood generosity.  That's also the appeal of this true story in general, despite how slimy an individual Larson was, and the movie does understand that.  That gives it some value even when the drama hits a Whammy.

A Minecraft Movie

⭐️⭐️

Genre:  Comedy, Fantasy, Adventure

Director:  Jared Hess

Starring:  Jack Black, Jason Momoa, Danielle Brooks, Emma Myers, Sabastian Hansen

Based on the popular, and I mean popular, video game, A Minecraft Movie sees a group of misfits sucked up into the blocky universe and are tasked by the legendary warrior Steve to fend off a magic orb that is shaped like a cube from an army of evil pigs.  But the film's story doesn't seem that important, what seems to matter more is the earnest adaptation of the Minecraft world in live action.  Neveryoumind that it looks hideous in live action, but it's the thought that counts.  A Minecraft Movie is a movie that is specifically created to play itself up to the fans of the video game, similarly to The Super Mario Bros. Movie.  The primary difference between the two is that Mario at least found something of a throughline story in its pandering, while A Minecraft Movie is just about Minecraft things happening to people because whatever.  The movie's enthusiasm for itself is almost enough to off-set how uncreative it is.  Unfortunately, the saddest thing a movie based on a video game that rewards creativity can be is to be uncreative.  The movie is all gusto and no heart.  But at least Jack Black looks like he's having the time of his life, because how often does he get to play a legendary fantasy warrior?  But if you want a movie that is practically the same premise but uses Jack Black more consistently than this, I'd recommend Jumanji:  Welcome to the Jungle.

The most telling thing about this movie is that it was home to one of the most curious theater experiences I've had, where the theater was filled with rowdy teenagers who erupted with applause whenever the movie showed off something from the game but just chatted casually (and loudly) when the actual story was in motion, not even stopping to laugh at the jokes.  Granted, they weren't great jokes, but it was an audience that seemed more interest in how many Easter Eggs they received than watching an actual movie.  Oddly, there was also another guy in the front of the theater who was getting increasingly pissed off at them, mocking their applause at random points when the movie was doing nothing, standing up and calling the entire theater "a bunch of virgins," and finally ran out of the theater whilst giving everyone the finger while screaming "MINECRAFT SUCKS!" two minutes before the movie ended.  No, this guy was not me, thanks for asking.  I don't know what was up with him; maybe he was just hoping to watch a movie without dealing with a bunch of rowdy teens that wouldn't shut up.  If anything, it probably points to the difference in audience that A Minecraft Movie is aiming for, because the people who enjoyed it most didn't seem to care that the movie wasn't really about anything.  I encourage fan enthusiasm, but I also haven't played Minecraft.  I've watched people play Minecraft, so I'm not completely blind to what was going on.  I'd also have appreciated it if the movie were more than a bunch of people screaming inside a blocky environment if it wants me to cheer with the rest of them.

Movies Still Playing At My Theater

Captain America:  Brave New World ⭐️1/2

Death of a Unicorn ⭐⭐1/2

Mickey 17 ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Snow White ⭐️⭐️

The Woman in the Yard ⭐⭐

A Working Man ⭐⭐

New To Digital

Black Bag ⭐️⭐️1/2

The Monkey ⭐⭐1/2

Opus ⭐

Paddington in Peru ⭐️⭐️⭐️

The Unbreakable Boy ⭐⭐

New To Physical

Companion ⭐⭐⭐1/2

A Complete Unknown ⭐⭐⭐

Dog Man ⭐⭐⭐

Flight Risk ⭐⭐

Love Hurts ⭐⭐

Mufasa:  The Lion King ⭐️⭐️1/2

Coming Soon!